JPMorgan Chase To Pay $2 Billion For Failing To Notice Madoff Was Giant Scheming Schemer

JPMorgan Chase To Pay $2 Billion For Failing To Notice Madoff Was Giant Scheming Schemer

It’s only the first week of January and already it’s an expensive year for giant bank JPMorgan Chase. Just blame Bernie Madoff. [More]

Fellow Prisoners Wanted Madoff To Teach Investment Classes

Fellow Prisoners Wanted Madoff To Teach Investment Classes

If you had unparalleled access to one of the biggest names in investing, wouldn’t you ask that person for some advice? That’s the logic that some prisoners at the federal prison in Butner, N.C. are using. Their financially savvy neighbor is Bernie Madoff, mastermind of the biggest Ponzi scheme in history. Yes, he knows something about investing. [More]

Madoff Victims Will Start Getting Refunds This Week

Madoff Victims Will Start Getting Refunds This Week

Those who lost money investing with jailed shyster Bernie Madoff will be getting some of their ill-advised expenditures back this week, thanks to the bankruptcy court-mandated liquidation of his estate. [More]

Judge Tells Madoff Investors They Won't Get All Their Fake Money Back

Judge Tells Madoff Investors They Won't Get All Their Fake Money Back

A federal judge shot down an appeal from Madoff investors who didn’t just want the money they’d invested back, they wanted the amount of money Madoff said they were worth on paper. The judge said that Madoff’s financial statements were “fictitious” and thus can’t be used as a basis for claims by investors. [More]

Mets To Sell Stake To Hedge Fund Manager For $200 Million

Mets To Sell Stake To Hedge Fund Manager For $200 Million

New York Mets owners Fred and Jeff Wilpon and Saul Katz will sell a minority stake in the troubled team to hedge fund manager David Einhorn for $200 million. The cash will allow the team to remain solvent, and presumably avoid a Dodgers-style takeover by Major League Baseball. [More]

Madoff: Chase Execs Were Aware Of Ponzi Scheme

Madoff: Chase Execs Were Aware Of Ponzi Scheme

Despite evidence to the contrary, the folks at JPMorgan Chase have denied knowing anything at all about Bernie Madoff’s multi-billion dollar Ponzi scheme. But in a new interview, the scam artist says that senior Chase execs weren’t exactly in the dark about what he was doing. [More]

Madoff Bragged That He Gave Away $9B To Friends Before Being Arrested

Madoff Bragged That He Gave Away $9B To Friends Before Being Arrested

The NY Post says that a fellow inmate of Bernie Madoff told them that the ponzi-schemer bragged about giving away $9 billion to three people before he was caught. [More]

SEC Soaking Up To Their Eyeballs In Porn, Can't See Fraud

SEC Soaking Up To Their Eyeballs In Porn, Can't See Fraud

ABCNews is reporting that “a new government report reveals that some high-level regulators have spent more time looking at porn than policing Wall Street.” It seems that the report, obtained by ABC News, says senior employees of the SEC spent hours on the commission’s computers looking at sites like naughty.com, skankwire, youporn, and others, thus clearly removing their only defense, the fact that “X” is right next to “C” on the keyboard. [More]

Madoff Gets S*** Kicked Out Of Him In Prison

Madoff Gets S*** Kicked Out Of Him In Prison

A fellow inmate at Butner federal prison brutually fulfilled the fantasy of millions by brutally beating the piss out of ponzi schemer Bernie Madoff, reports WSJ. [More]

Some Madoff Victims May Have To Give Money Back

Some Madoff Victims May Have To Give Money Back

Some of Madoff’s investors took money out of the scheme — not knowing it was a scheme. Now it seems those people might be out of luck — and will have to pay the money back, says Reuters. [More]

Inspector General Admits SEC Pretty Much Sucks At Its Job

Inspector General Admits SEC Pretty Much Sucks At Its Job

The SEC’s inspector general has released a jailhouse interview in which his royal Ponziness, Bernie Madoff himself, explains that he got away with his scheme because the SEC basically sucks.

Madoff Victims Receive First Repayment Of $534 Million

Madoff Victims Receive First Repayment Of $534 Million

The trustee who’s liquidating Bernie Madoff’s firm has released $534.2 million in repayments to some of his victims, reports Bloomberg. The half-billion is a drop in the bucket of total verified losses, which are now more than $21 billion. But hey, those 1,558 victims whose claims were approved for this partial payout are probaby pretty happy—which is more than you can say for the 2,500+ Madoff customers who may be sued to return fake profits.

Guy Who Made More Than $7 Billion Off Madoff Found At Bottom Of Pool

Guy Who Made More Than $7 Billion Off Madoff Found At Bottom Of Pool

Jeffry Picower, the only Madoff investor to wind up on the Forbes list of the 400 richest Americans, was found dead at the bottom of his pool Sunday, says the AP. He is accused of making more than $7 billion off of Madoff’s ponzi scheme.

Super-Rich People Have $300 Billion Less

Super-Rich People Have $300 Billion Less

Forbes says that the collective worth of the 400 richest people fell by $300 billion or 19% to $1.27 trillion. The top reasons for the decline were market turmoil, plummeting real estate prices, fraud and divorce.

Half of Madoff "Victims" Didn't Actually Lose Money

Half of Madoff "Victims" Didn't Actually Lose Money

Most investors who put money into Bernard Madoff’s funds over the decades he was in business came up losers when the house of cards collapsed. Some, however, lost more than others. According to a new court filing, about half of the investors who had accounts in Madoff’s Ponzi scheme at the time it was shut down didn’t actually lose any of the original principal they put into the funds.

Bernie Madoff's Beach House Sells For $8.75 Million

Bernie Madoff's Beach House Sells For $8.75 Million

An unidentified person has offered $8.75 million cash–more than the asking price–for Bernie Madoff’s beachfront home in Long Island. Bidders made sealed offers for the property, and the realtors say they won’t reveal any more details until after the deal closes. The house is supposedly very fancy, but if we lived there we’d just tear it up looking for hidden piles of cash. This is why we can never have anything nice.

Party Crazy Wells Fargo Banker Fired

Party Crazy Wells Fargo Banker Fired

The Wells Fargo banker who turned a foreclosed Malibu beach house into his her summer party pad has been fired. The couple who originally owned the place were victims of Bernie Madoff, and lost the $12 million house in May. Wells says the banker acted alone, and added, “We deeply regret the activities that have taken place as they do not reflect the conduct we expect of our team members.”

Bernard Madoff's Penthouse Now On Sale For $7.5 Million

Bernard Madoff's Penthouse Now On Sale For $7.5 Million

If you’ve ever wanted to live like the King of Ponzi Schemes, now’s your chance. Bernard Madoff’s penthouse at 133 East 64th Street in New York is on the market, and can be yours for a mere $7.5 million. The U.S. Marshal Service, which is liquidating Madoff’s assets, gave a guided tour, and The New York Post captured it on video. Inside, a shoe closet to make Imelda Marcos jealous, Ruth and Bernie’s separate bedrooms, the shelves that once held monogrammed “BLM” shirts, and Deputy Marshal Roland Ubaldo doing his best Chad Rogers impression.