(Ben Schumin)

Hating Lines Isn’t A Good Enough Excuse To Shoplift $300 In Liquor, Other Goods From Walmart

Long lines are a pain, but they’re part of the deal when you shop at major retail stores. If you don’t like to wait you can always fulfill your grocery list during off-hours, but you can’t just walk out the door without paying. [More]

(FOX Baltimore on Twitter)

No, This Isn’t The iPhone 6 Line; It’s The Ray Rice Jersey Exchange Line

All eyes are on long lines today, and it’s not just the arrival of the iPhone 6/6 Plus in stores that have queues snaking along for what would seem like all eternity: The line to exchange Ray Rice jerseys for another Baltimore Ravens player is reportedly half a mile long. [More]

(KRQE)

Yep, Shoppers Started Camping Out For Black Friday This Wednesday

Yes, it’s advantageous to line up for an irresistible sale early. A duo of California shoppers were a little too early to this year’s Black Friday sale at their local Best Buy, though, camping outside of the store more than a week ahead of time. Security staff booted them off the property, asking them to return on Thanksgiving. Thank Providence someone in this scenario is sane. [More]

Your Complaint Is Not Important At Kmart If You're 'Just A Customer'

Your Complaint Is Not Important At Kmart If You're 'Just A Customer'

Terrie finished up her shopping at her local Kmart and headed for the checkout. She was horrified to see that each open checkout had at least dozen customers in line, and the store had no intention of opening any more. When she inquired about making her purchase at the jewelry counter or opening some more registers, she learned exactly how important customers are to this particular store. [More]

Disney World Deploys Massive Underground Lair To Combat Lines

Disney World Deploys Massive Underground Lair To Combat Lines

Disney has developed a new subterranean nerve center to combat lines as they happen. Pirates of the Caribbean too slow? Launch more boats and deploy a Jack Sparrow actor to distract customers. Fantasyland overflowing but Tomorrowland bare? Send out a mini-parade to lure guests over. Sounds like the basis for a fun new real-time strategy game. [More]

TRON Preview Screening Marred By Line-Jumpers, Mean Staff

TRON Preview Screening Marred By Line-Jumpers, Mean Staff

Tavie shares her first-person experience of waiting for hours in 20 degree weather to see the new TRON screening, and her run-ins with the professional line-jumpers and surly event staff. [More]

Wait On Line To Show Your Costco Receipt Or You Will Be Assaulted

Wait On Line To Show Your Costco Receipt Or You Will Be Assaulted

Let’s say you’re in a rush after buying a fan at Costco. You look past the line packed with people and carts and spy a lone employee standing by the exit. Do you walk over and show your receipt? What’s the worst that could happen? Let’s ask Reader Shay. [More]

Pondering Consumerism: Which Is The Stupider Line To Be In?

Pondering Consumerism: Which Is The Stupider Line To Be In?

Over at reddit they are pondering these two photos, and asking themselves which line is more pathetic. They don’t really have an organized poll going on so we thought we’d help. [More]

Groceries Stores Turning To Single Checkout Lines

Groceries Stores Turning To Single Checkout Lines

Rich, poor, Slimfast or Milky Way, one thing grocery store customers can usually agree on is that they hate waiting in line. Retailers have sought out a number of solutions over the years – from self-checkout terminals to entertaining distractions and ambient fragrances – but, according to the Wall Street Journal, the latest trend is single-line queues.

Dear Kroger, Please Make Self Check-Out Suck Less

Dear Kroger, Please Make Self Check-Out Suck Less

Self check-out is great if, say, you’ve got one of those supermarkets where the teenaged clerks hate you for choosing their lane and spend more time talking to each other than scanning your items. It’s not so great if you force all of your customers to use the system because you’ve decided to close down every other human-powered lane but one.

Going to KFC For Free Chicken? You've Got A Long Wait

Going to KFC For Free Chicken? You've Got A Long Wait

It’s the first lunch period since the Oprah-promoted KFC grilled chicken giveaway started. Lines are predictably long.

The Word 'Free' Makes People Lose Their Minds

The Word 'Free' Makes People Lose Their Minds

Seriously? It’s stay-indoors weather, we keep seeing that our food safety system is fundamentally broken, and people still lined up outside Denny’s today like soup kitchen hoboes for the chance to nosh on some flour+watermilk discs, HFCS syrup, and a little pig meat? (And also eggs, a reader points out.) We hope you left a tip, at least. As Naomi, who took photos of her local Denny’s, reminds us, “If ever there were a day where Denny’s employees have to work hard, this is it.”

Fry's Employees Sell Opportunity To Cut Black Friday Line

Fry's Employees Sell Opportunity To Cut Black Friday Line

Fry’s employees in Renton, Washington sold Black Friday aspirants the chance to cut to the front of the pre-dawn line for between $108.79 and $200, including tax. Puzzled shoppers were assured that the money went to Fry’s, not the employees. A Fry’s worker explained the situation with disarming naiveté:

When KING 5 asked about this at the customer service desk, one employee said: “Oh they stopped doing that. They weren’t supposed to.” The employee said the store manager put a stop to it.

Anyone who paid the advancement fee will receive a full refund. The rogue salesmen will be sent to the back of the unemployment line.

Tomato Juice Spill Causes Massive Delays At LaGuardia

Tomato Juice Spill Causes Massive Delays At LaGuardia

Lines the length of city blocks filled New York’s LaGuardia airport Saturday morning after a careless worker spilled tomato juice onto one of the five x-ray machines in the American Airlines terminal. A TSA spokesman cast the tomato juice’s victory over the machines as a failure of science, saying: “That’s the risk you take when you deal with technology.” Passengers were understandably pissed.

When CBS 2 HD told one woman the reason for the delays, she asked if we were “kidding,” but it was no joke. The Transportation Safety Administration confirmed the spill knocked out one of the five units that screen thousands of passengers here each day.

Menards: No Waiting For Savings

Menards: No Waiting For Savings

Reader jpac sent us this photo, and we thought about it while waiting in the world’s longest line at an understaffed Target the other day. Say what you will about that mother@#$!@!-ing Menards jingle that they endlessly…endlessly repeat over the loud speakers…

Police Called After Walmart Changes Mind About Selling Wii

Wii fans in Washington state queued up for the Wii at 10pm last night, only to be told they weren’t going on sale until eight this morning. A dispatch from the front lines:

Skip Black Friday Lines

If you’re not going for a door-buster or a super-limited item, this trick could save you a lot of time when shopping on Black Friday.