Consumerist: Ken Lay

Anybody Wanna Buy An Enron CEO's Desk?

Meg Marco — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 11:12:48 EDT

Desks belonging to Ken Lay and Jeffrey Skilling are up for auction on eBay with the proceeds going to help a Houston-area animal charity. From CNNMoney:

Lay and Skilling, who also served as CEO, were convicted in May 2006 for their role in the accounting fraud that led to the collapse of Enron in 2001. The bankruptcy erased billions in investors' money and wiped out the pensions of thousands of Enron employees.
The custom-made desks with "an elegant Makore Pommelle veneer" have a minimum bid of $25,000 each, which so far has not been met. The auction began Friday and runs for 10 days.

Skilling is currently serving a 24- year prison term. Lay passed away last July. The desks were donated by the firm that bought Enron's former headquarters.—MEGHANN MARCO

Enron Founder & CEO Ken Lay's Custom Office Desk [eBay]
Ken Lay's desk goes up for grabs [CNNMoney]

The News; Enron Curses All Who Penetrate Its Tomb

Ben Popken — Thu, 13 Jul 2006 11:54:53 EDT

• Bizzare, inexplicable, random act of violence. [NYT] "Man Tied to Enron Case Found Dead in London Park"
• They don't call fashion superficial for nothing. [LAT] "Illusions on Sale in Shanghai"
• In the future, you can have any cellphone company you like, as long as it's black. [LAT] "AT&T, Verizon Mergers Face Competition Concerns"
• "Ken Lay was neither black nor poor, but he was a victim of a lynching." Yeah, and Pol Pot was a civil rights activist. [CT] "Dignitaries Turn Out To Memorialize Man Who Founded Enron"
• A day after McDonald's pulls theirs, Wendy's announces plan to offer an even spicier chicken sandwich than ever before. Sluts. [CT] "Wendy's spices up chicken sandwich"
• Personally, we're a slut for love. [NYT] "The Taming of the Slur"

The News

Ben Popken — Tue, 11 Jul 2006 13:46:34 EDT

• You know "Anarchy goes better with Coke," is the headline they really wanted. [NYT] "Even Statelessness Goes Better With Coke. Or Does It?"
• Hardly what you would call a splintered ruler. [LAT] "AT&T to Pay $550,000 to Settle Privacy Cases"
• Every swipe buys another bullet for Chairman Mao! [NYT] "Borrowing Rises as Credit Card Use Jump"
• Boring complainers elicit smaller sympathies, study we just made up shows. [NYT] "They Sure Beat the Airlines, but Hotels Could Still..."
• There's danger beyond the mere ignominy of driving a focus-group tested toaster oven. [CT] "Scion 'moonroofs' subject of safety probe"
• If you can't have Lay, there's always other chips to go with the fish. [CT] "Enron-related case means test for new treaty"

All The News That's Fit To Self-Immolate

Ben Popken — Mon, 10 Jul 2006 12:05:14 EDT

• Grocers hate it when their loss leaders have no followers. [NYT] "Sale Shoppers Annoy Grocers as They Save"
• Burning smell noticed by large newspaper. [NYT] "Dell's Exploding Computer and Other Image Problems"
• People noticing distinctive fish smell from Lay's coffin are noticed by large newspaper. [NYT] "A Sense of Something Rotten in Aspen"
• 100 years after its first publication, does The Jungle suffer from misleading packagaing? Perhaps a lack of oxygen to make it look more Red? [Slate] "Welcome to The Jungle"
• It's like that children's game, would you rather have your hip disintegrate, or your jaw? [CT] "Lawyers gear up to attack Fosamax"

Best Posts Ever, This Week

Ben Popken — Fri, 07 Jul 2006 13:27:25 EDT

Our most popular posts this week that had nothing to do with retention policies or call centers.

• Best Buy: "Oh Yeah, Tetris Breaks All The Time." Really...we've seen Nintendo games propelled out of cannons that still worked after you blew into the cartridge slot a few times.
• Sony PSP: Racist? It's not so much lynch ropes and bedsheets, more like that funny yin-yang tattoo over that girl's coin slot.
• Party Girl Gets Great Snort Sack from Beatnik Bags! Talk about user-generated content.
• Ken Lay Predicted His Own Death. The blogorama demands blood.
• Reader Flexes Consumer Powers. This is what consumer blogs were made for, being the Solomon of ice tea service.

Ken Lay Predicted His Own Death

Ben Popken — Wed, 05 Jul 2006 22:40:58 EDT

The official Ken Lay info page, besides being a prime example of Web 1.0 brochureware, has a letter to visitors penned shortly after the trial's conclusion. In it, he expresses surprise and shock (twice) at the outcome, some blah blah blah, and then, his belief that this is all part of God's plan. In light of Ken's recent "demise," the concluding paragraph runs rife with irony and foreboding.

You were too good for life in prison, Kenny-boy. God loves you back, so much so that he couldn't wait to look down and see you dancing on the devil's pitchfork!

(Thanks to Chris!)

We Demand Kenny Boy's Blood

Ben Popken — Wed, 05 Jul 2006 17:37:29 EDT

So, it seems that some people don't think Ken Lay is actually dead.

Somehow, a man who raped and pillaged and twisted every conceivable transaction into a lucrative financial instrument and defrauded billions, seems capable of faking his own death to avoid a life sentence! For shame. Let the man rest in peace and accept the lack of details as part of the family's request for privacy and circumspection in this tragic event.

Although, suspiciously enough, he does have a new blog...

The News; Bury My Lump of Coal Under the Old Apple Tree

Ben Popken — Wed, 05 Jul 2006 11:43:40 EDT

• Saying it was due to a broken heart would require he had one in the first place. [NYT] "Kenneth L. Lay, Ex-Chairman of Enron, Dies"
• Half speculative litigation, half, "why don't you just stop making shit that disintegrates people's jaws?" [LAT] "Another Merck Drug Is Under Legal Attack"
• If you have a box containing thousands of your co-worker's social security numbers, it's increasingly becoming a bad idea to bring it home. [LAT] "Employees Sue Railroad Over Social Security Number Theft"
• BP oil contains black soylent green. [CT] "Jackson Leads Anti-BP March Near Refinery"

The News: All The Fat That's Fit To Print

popkin — Fri, 26 May 2006 10:45:14 EDT

• Ken Lay: "This is not the outcome we ~~paid for~~ expected." [LAT]
• McDonald's milkshake foams at the mouth over mounting outcry, plans to fight criticism over deceptive marketing with stronger, even more deceptive marketing. [Tribune]
• Flames burns brightly in the eyes of devoted Weber Grill fans. [LAT]
• FCC to examine TV station's use of PR reels as news. Due to backlog, the first questionable story to be looked is one touting the benefits of "Agent Orange Juice." [LAT]
• Hasbro cancels plans for line of racy dolls based around 'Pussycat Dolls,' switches focus to My First Little Lolita rollout. [NYT]