From the Daily Record:

Samaroo, of Middle River, was employed at the IKEA Direct in Rosedale, which handles phone and mail orders. Between September 2007 and August 2008, Samaroo gave himself refunds for purchases made by customers, Lippe said. He doled out the money to family and friends and bought himself a new car, a motorcycle and several crystal pieces, among other goods, Lippe said.

Kind of makes you wonder how he thought this movie was going to end. Ya know?

IKEA worker pleads guilty to stealing $400K [Daily Record via Inside Charm City]
(Photo: Meg Marco )

Scott's letter to Ikea

Hello.

This weekend I drove 5.5 hours from Green Bay, WI to your Schaumburg, IL store to buy my 3 year old daughter her first big girl bed. We picked out the Tromsnes day bed and bought a princess canopy and a comforter and bedding and a stuffed tiger. Oh and a box of double chocolate crisps and two sodas. Aren't I the PERFECT Ikea customer?

I brought the name of the bed to your info center, they ordered our bed and I was told to pick it up at furniture pick-up.

I picked it up, packed it up and drove back home. Tonight, I broke open the box to put my daughter's new bed together only to discover I don't have all the parts necessary to assemble it. Well, I should say, I have all the parts that were suppose to be in the box, but I need ANOTHER box of parts (Part number 85698810) in order for my daughter to have a sleepable bed.

Why wouldn't your floor person tell me that? Why wouldn't the guy at the info center tell me that? Why wouldn't the girl at the pick up desk tell me that?

Tonight, I spent 45 minutes in a phone loop where I called the Schaumburg store and kept pressing the same series of 1, 3, 3, 2, 2 only to come back around to press 1, again.

So here I sit frustrated and I'm wondering if you have something I can tell my daughter as to why she can't sleep in her big girl bed...

Do I really have to drive another 11 hours to get the bed I thought I bought on Sunday?

Your prompt response would be very much appreciated.

And Ikea's response? Good, Great, not so good, and then Awesome:

The next day I got an email from CustRel saying they'd take care of me (Cool!). Then I got an email from the Schaumburg Ikea asking for more details so they could help (Yay!). Then I got an email from Ikea U.S. CustRel saying I was crap out of luck. That the pieces I was missing are an extra purchase and not available via phone orders. I would, in fact, have to drive back down to Chicago to buy the part (Booo!). THEN I got another email and phone call from the Schaumburg customer relations guy who took my receipt information and mailing address and he assured me that they'd be shipping out the parts via UPS (cautious Woot!). Today: The parts came!!

Another successful EECB, and a just response from Ikea. Glad we could help, Scott.

Top 10 IKEA Furniture Mods [Lifehacker] (Photo: joelgoodman)

(Photo: Ben Popken)

Belinda writes:

In early July my roommates and I visited an IKEA store in Schaumburg, IL. We spent over $1000 on furnishings that day, opting to have much of it shipped to our apartment in a week. On July 13, movers arrived and carried 14 boxes up to our second floor apartment. I arrived on the scene halfway through the delivery process. They carried boxes in and we pointed them either to the living room or my bedroom to set them down. We checked them off as they carried them in the door, not as they set them in the correct room. They hurriedly asked for initials and left. We grabbed lunch and returned an hour later to begin the long assembly process. I asked my friend to put music on in my room. She reappeared with my 60gb iPod Video, completely smashed.

I had purchased an iHome just the day before, and it was sitting on the floor next a lamp I had purchased at IKEA and taken home (rather than having it delivered). The iPod was docked on top of the iHome, and a long heavy box of wood had been dropped on it. It fell onto a wall outlet as well, cracking the casing and completely bending the prongs of the cords plugged into it sideways. I used pliers and fixed the lamp and iHome's electrical plugs, but the iHome was damaged beyond repair. The iPod dock on the top no longer functions at all, and the internal clock is now unable to distinguish between AM and PM, rendering this equipment a 60-dollar paperweight.

I called IKEA that day and presumably filed a case, because I was promised a return call the next day. I received no such call, and on July 15 I sent this message to IKEA through their online feedback form:

My IKEA order was shipped by Encenda on Sunday morning (7/13). I promptly contacted IKEA that day when I found that the movers had dropped a heavy box of wood from my MALM bed frame onto a wall outlet, iPod, and iHome speaker deck, breaking all of them. The outlet is cracked. My landlord assessed that we'd need new plastic casing. The iPod is completely shattered. I bought it for $399. The iHome's top connector the iPod was sitting in no longer functions. The iHome was purchased just the day before for $60. Considering the mass amount of damage done, I need to get in contact with someone who can help me receive some sort of compensation. Surely IKEA has an insurance policy with Ensenda. I called the day of the incident and was promised a return call the next day. I received nothing, so this is my second attempt at getting results. My phone number is [redacted] Thank you.

- Belinda [redacted]

Later that day I received this:

Hello Belinda,

Thank you for taking the time to contact us. We do apologize for any difficulty that you may have experienced.

Please call the Schaumburg store at 847-969-9700, to present a case to management of this matter. If you already have a case please give them the case number.

We do apologize for any inconvenience, and we thank you for your inquiry.

Best Regards, Beldian
IKEA Customer Care Center

I promptly did just that, and after being transferred to enough different people that I had no idea who I was talking to, I finally spoke to someone who could possibly help me. She asked for a detailed account of what happened, which I relayed to her. She repeated it all back to me slowly and typed furiously, leading me to believe she was filing some sort of report on my behalf. Once we finished, she promised I'd be contacted "in a few weeks." I waited three weeks, received no response, and decided it was time to call to check on the status of my complaint. On August 12, I began my foray into IKEA's customer service yet again.

The first call was spent trying to locate my case. I gave my name, address, and phone number in every way shape and form, to no avail. I explained that I'd never been given a case number, but explained the situation in detail to other representatives. I said I didn't know if I was talking to IKEA or Encenda (the moving company), to which she hastily replied, "Oh no, whoever would have sent you to them was wrong. This is an IKEA issue, not the moving company's. They have nothing to do with it."

She put me on hold to 'check on something,' and after waiting 3 or 4 minutes, I heard a dialtone. She'd hung up on me. I called again and explained that I was trying to locate my case and was unaware of whether my property damage case should be taken up with IKEA or the moving company. She assured me that it was the moving company's issue and said she'd put me on hold to get a hold of the moving company. She hung up on me.

I called again and got a man who seemed genuinely concerned with my situation. I explained that I had just called two other times trying to locate a case that obviously did not exist, and insisted on filing a new one and starting fresh. He kept saying we'd "take care of this situation" and that everything would get resolved. I sat on the line with him in silence for about 5 straight minutes before he cut back in, making sure I was still there. When I affirmed this, he asked if he could put me on hold to contact the Schaumburg store (isn't that who I called?!) to which I loudly responded no before he put me on hold anyway a second later. I sat on hold for 45 minutes before I hung up and called the IKEA customer service line the fourth time. This woman checked and found a case that had been filed that evening (presumably by the man before he put me on hold for 45 minutes), and I asked for a phone number to the moving company. She got it for me and gave me a case number (finally!) before hanging up. She'd promised I'd hear something in 24 hours.

Sure enough, this time I got a response. I received a voicemail from a woman in IKEA's claims department informing me that she put a claim in with the delivery company because "they really don't have anything to do with property claims." I crossed my fingers and hoped that I'd hear from the movers, seeing as IKEA was the middleman in this situation and they hadn't done so well in getting my message across. Amazingly, I received a voicemail from a woman representing what I assume is the moving company. Cindy [redacted] from Veteran's Messenger service claim department... "just to follow up on this after investigating and pulling paperwork, there was no documentation on any paperwork that any items were damaged during this delivery, therefore we are denying the claim. If you have any questions, feel free to contact IKEA."

So I'm not supposed to contact the movers, I'm supposed to contact IKEA. Again. I promptly called her back and asked who exactly I should be talking to in order to receive compensation for the $500-worth of damage done to my personal belongings. She said there was something missing in the documentation, therefore the movers were entitled to deny any wrongdoing.

I opted to not contact IKEA. Long story short, movers dropped a heavy box on my electronics, obviously breaking them, then picked up the box and scurried out without mention of damage. I called IKEA that day to file a claim, was ignored, called 5 more times before finally getting a real case filed, was told that IKEA isn't responsible, was sent to the moving company's claims department, then was denied any wrongdoing by the moving company because IKEA hadn't filed some sort of paperwork.

This is just blatant passing of the blame back and forth, not to mention a slew of customer service representatives who seemed to be confused. Half of them assured me it was the moving company's fault, half of them assured me it was an IKEA issue completely. Now I have an apartment completely furnished by IKEA that I wish I never would have purchased. The furniture itself was a little under a thousand dollars, but adding in delivery charges and the damage, I spent around $1600 on this stuff. Pay close attention to your deliveries. It's been a few months and I've spent hours on the phone, but now understand I'll never be compensated for this disaster delivery. I have every piece of paper & receipt along with my shattered iPod and outlet casing prominently displayed so that I never forget the price of all this furniture. It's also served as a great segue into a heated explanation of my hatred for IKEA whenever a passer-by asks what happened.

We think that since you have a business relationship with IKEA and IKEA only, you should deal with them. Now, obviously that hasn't worked too well, but we recommend taking the following steps.

Write a very concise EECB (Executive Email Carpet Bomb) detailing the chain of events that you describe here. For more information about launching an EECB, click here. You need to reach someone at IKEA who actually knows what to do in this situation, and is able to file accurate paperwork.

If that doesn't work, and it may not, consider filing a small claims lawsuit against IKEA. It's easy and inexpensive, and it will make you feel better about your furniture if you win. Also, IKEA might not even show up, and you may get a default judgment.

Here are some email addresses to try, and some information about small claims court. Good luck.

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• The Fruit Company: 25% off everything coupon

Marc writes:

I've never written to your site before, but this story was so over-the-top ridiculous I had to share it.

In furnishing my new apartment, I recently bought a leather love seat from Ikea. For some reason, you can go in person to the store and order it for next day delivery, but you can't do the same action over the phone. Calling-in routes you to Ikea Direct that draws its stock from a distant warehouse and takes much longer to deliver. Makes perfect sense!

My couch arrived the next morning wrapped in plastic and cardboard. I could still make out its vague chocolate-brown shape, which is why I was surprised to see a large blotch of white beneath the layers of plastic. I confirmed that it was the right couch with the driver and shrugged my shoulders when he said it was.

After an hour or two of building some of the other pieces that had arrived alongside the couch, I was ready to tackle it. I began to tear off the plastic and toss it aside like a yuppie on Christmas morning. Once all was torn away and done, I was presented with one leather couch that was lacking the seat cushion cover. Just a naked white cushion. I called the driver and asked him if it was still in the back of the truck. He said no and that it "came with the couch", a phrase I would come to hear often over the following 72 hours. He said I should call the store. I dug through the packaging several more times in search of the wayward cushion cover to no avail. I called the store, but was routed to Ikea Direct, who told me that it would be no problem to send me out a new one. I told her I didn't want to wait a week or however long it took, I was impatient and wanted it now! She said I would also have no problem walking into the store with my receipt for another one. I asked her if she could notate somewhere that I would be doing that so that they wouldn't think I was some sort of thief. She chuckled that idea away and I added the task to my to-do list absentmindedly. This was Friday afternoon.

I didn't make it to Ikea in Burbank until Sunday. I was told I would have to wait in the Returns & Exchanges line. When my number was called, I went up to the teenage clerk and asked for the various screws that Ikea always seem to forget and then explained the cushion situation. He nodded and disappeared to the back for a few minutes. He returned and gave me a handful of screws and smiled trimphantly. I reminded him about the cushion. He disappeared to the back for a few minutes and then returned and pulled up the product record on the screen. "It comes with the couch" he said definitively. I agreed, but told him that in this case it hadn't. He seemed puzzled and disappeared to the back again. He came back and, turning the computer screen towards me for my benefit, he repeated that it "came with the couch". After some back and forth, he disappeared to the back.

More than a few minutes passed. I saw him come out of another door a few feet away and begin helping another customer. Someone new popped up in front of me and asked how he could help me. I absolutely hate it when retail employees just pass you off without a word, without an introduction thus forcing you to repeat your story yet again. I explained myself to this Manager, and he said it "comes with the couch". I clenched my teeth and tried not to scream. I recounted the timeline of the delivery. He said they would need to setup a home inspection or need photographic evidence. My jaw dropped. I told him I already had the expensive part of the couch and all I wanted was the cover. He asked if anyone could backup my story. I got the number from my cell history and he disappeared into the back to call it.

Ten or fifteen minutes later, he comes out from the back and hands my paperwork to yet another employee and walks right by me. I stop him and ask the outcome. He said they were going to take care of it. Immaturely, I asked if the driver corroborated my story, which he confirmed and walked away. The third employee told me to take a seat as it would be awhile.

It was awhile. An hour had passed since I first walked up. Manager returned finally and explained that another customer who had bought the same couch had needed a new cushion cover because theirs was torn, so an employee had yanked it off of the couch I would later buy. Manager said they were going to order me another one. I nodded and refrained from yelling "I told you so".

Another couple minutes went by, Manager sent me over to the delivery desk to arrange the delivery of an entirely new couch. I objected saying it was a waste of fuel and time when all I needed was a cushion that could fit in a backpack. This was apparently impossible. At this point, now approaching two hours, I lost it. I told him that I wanted my initial delivery fee completely refunded as they had delivered a nightmare instead of a couch and that as Manager, he really should've done his homework and researched the issue before tacitly accusing a customer of wrongdoing with the implication that inspections and photographic evidence would be needed. I also pointed out that I had noticed the white cushion upon first glance but had assumed the cover was elsewhere in the packaging whereas an employee should've picked up on this immediately. All of a sudden, the Manager got all up in my face gangbanger-style and grunted that he hadn't accused me of anything. I realized that he probably didn't know what "tacitly" meant. Oops. I repeated that I wanted a refund. He exclaimed that he wasn't charging me for the re-delivery. My jaw dropped a second time causing me to yank it up quick enough to fire back that it would be ludicrous to charge a customer for the store's mistake.

The next morning, a new set of delivery guys came with the new couch. Before they could unload it though, I explained to them what had happened. They seemed puzzled. I told them that all we needed to do was swap out the seats, which we did. They were amazed at the store's incompetence, which made three of us. As they pulled away, they yelled a hearty "thank you" for saving them (and their backs) the unnecessary loading.

It took a week of phone calls to Ikea Direct before I got my money refunded. Each time, the representative told me to wait for the Burbank store to call me for resolution, but to call back if they failed to do so. They finally did call me but were only willing to refund part of the fee, which I told them was unnacceptable. They called back and agreed to a full refund. I win!

This is exemplary of a common virus infecting corporate customer service. It is never good business to treat your customer like a criminal and to make an assumption without fact to back it up. The returns process is a tricky one in that it requires a good deal of actual skill, something that big box stores feel is unnecessary to endow their employees with. If you perform a return correctly, you retain a customer and their future purchases beyond the momentary loss of stock. If you don't, you lose not just the money for the returned item, but potentially all the future purchases of an angry customer.

(Photo: Orin Optiglot)

At Ikea, we were interested in a $20, natural wood step stool, until we found a bright blue floor model for $15. We couldn't find anything but the natural finish in the warehouse, so we spoke to a manager, who told us that the blue one must have been from last year (it was kicking around in one of those "Look at how much Ikea furniture I can fit in my 200 square foot apartment!" displays) and the price had gone up. She happily wrote us out a price override, which allowed us to buy the step stool for $15 instead of $20.

We tried to buy a cheap drill at Home Depot, but when we brought home the drill that was advertised as coming with 26 bits, we were surprised to find only Phillips and flathead bits. We went back to Home Depot and returned the item, thinking we had grabbed the wrong one off the shelf. Then we noticed that they were advertising one model but stocking and selling a different one that only came with two bits. We pointed this out to a manager and suggested he give us a separate bit package for free, and he ended up giving us a package with more bits and lowering the price of the drill. Unfortunately, he didn't seem very interested in removing the misleading sign.

The next day, we went to Bed Bath and Beyond to look at towels, and picked some nice towels that rang up at twice the price. It turned out that all of the bath towels that were advertised were actually extra large bath sheets, which cost twice as much. The employee we talked to suggested coming back the next day and seeing if they had any towels, but we instead went to a manager, who rang up the sheets at the same price as the towels.

At the end of it all, we got a drill for a reduced price and a better bit package, a 25% discount on a stool we were going to buy anyway, and two bigger towels for the same price as the smaller ones. We did this by speaking with someone who has the authority to change the price of an item—each time the corrected price rang up, the cashier selected an option called "customer satisfaction." That such a menu item exists shows this is not an uncommon procedure; we didn't have to argue with any of the managers, and they all seemed happy to oblige, but if we hadn't sought them out and complained, we would have been stuck with overpriced, mislabeled items. We have friends who wouldn't bother complaining; they'd either keep an item they're not satisfied with, or return it and buy something more expensive. We doubt we have to tell our readers this, but just in case: don't be afraid to complain.

(Photo: Getty)

Pictured above is the triple hook, although there's a whole series. For instance, the toilet paper holder:
Are we reading too much into this? Regardless, we're buying the whole set, along with the signed Vonnegut print, and making the best bathroom ever.

An update… A few days after my EECB and post on Consumerist, I received an email from Stephan [redacted], the After Sales Manager at my local IKEA in West Chester, Ohio. His email was:

Mr. [redacted],

Thank you so much for taking the time to share your concerns with us. My name is Stephen [redacted], and I am the After Sales Manager at IKEA, West Chester. It is my responsibility to ensure that your experience with IKEA... before, during, and after your visit is everything you expected and more.

I was forwarded, and after reviewing your e-mail, I would like to extend my utmost apologies for your experience in our store. It is obvious to me that we failed in our efforts to exceed or even meet your expectations. It is our ambition to address and resolve your concerns regarding the return of your merchandise in an expedient and courteous manner.

By your e-mail, I can see the effort you and your wife extended in order to assemble your IKEA piece, and I apologize for the frustration this caused due to the defect in the bookcase's fit and finish. Periodically there are abnormalities in the prefabrication process, which could be the culprit in this situation. In the case of a non-defective product, our return policy applies to products that have not been assembled. In your case, you would not have known your bookcase was defective until you assembled it. Again, I am sincerely sorry for any inconvenience that this caused you and your wife.

If I could get you to do something for me, I can get this resolved right away. If you could contact my resolution team (513) 779-7100 ext 1450, and give them your transaction information, we will refund the remaining $60 back onto your credit card. Along with that, I would like to get your address and contact information, where I will send you out a gift card in hopes you will give us another chance. I only have your e-mail address.

I would like to thank you for bringing your concerns to our attention. It is through customer feedback like yours that enable us to take action to do a better job in the future. Please accept my apology, and trust that I have discussed your experience with all parties involved in order for us to better serve our customers. If you do give us another chance, please contact me at your next visit at the below number. I would like the opportunity to apologize in person.

Sincerely,

Stephen

I called at his request and gave him the requested information. A few days later, I received the following note in the mail with a receipt for the refund (of $63.75) and a $25 gift card.

Dear Andrew,

Enclosed you will find the transaction receipt for your refund. We refunded $60 back onto your credit card ($63.75 including tax). I have also enclosed a $25 gift card for your trouble. I hope you received my e-mail expressing my apologies to you and your wife for your experience at our store. I hope this resolution is to your satisfaction.

If you have any questions for further concerns, please feel free to contact me at the store.

I am satisfied with the outcome of this experience.

The EECB got IKEA's attention, for more information about launching your own EECB, click here.

(Photo: yarnzombie )

Drew writes:

My wife and I were very excited that a new IKEA store opened near our house. After a lot of planning, measuring, and consideration, we decided to purchase several bookshelves (from the Buddy line) and a large bookcase (from the Expedit line) for our home. We purchased nearly $600 worth of shelves, $200 of which was the Expedit bookcase.

I've assembled knock-down furniture before — Sauder, IKEA, etc — and I know from experience that it is important to carefully inventory (to make sure nothing is missing) and read the directions (to make sure you're using the right piece at the right time) before starting assembly, which I did.

It wasn't until one of the last steps in the (long) assembly process that it became clear that there was a problem with the materials — the pieces simply did not line up to allow finishing of the assembly. The top piece and side piece simply did not match up in one of the final steps. So, I carefully UN-assembled everything, re-read the directions, and verified that I was using the pieces appropriately. I was, so we started to re-assemble the bookcase. Near the end of the SECOND assembly, the problem was still there. It was apparent that this particular bookcase was defective. We also decided that it was too large for the space we'd intended (we'd measured the space and the model bookcase before purchasing it). While it FIT, it didn't look right to us, so we decided we wanted to get our money back.

My wife & I unassembled the piece (again) and loaded it into her car with the original boxes. This evening (1 day after purchasing the item), I drove to IKEA to return the item.

That's when the trouble started.

I loaded the pieces of the bookcase onto one of their carts and wheeled it into the returns department. I told them the piece was defective. They asked if I wanted an exchange. I said no, that it was larger than we wanted; we'd just like our money back.

They said that because the piece had been assembled (I'd left the little wooden connection pegs installed), and that the piece wasn't IN the original boxes (it was ON the original boxes — I was not interested in using my time to repack it in the boxes), and that the hardware (screws and stuff) were in a ziplock baggie and not their original packaging that they would have to charge me a 30% restocking fee. I asked if that held true even though the piece was defective and the clerk at the counter indicated that it was. I asked to speak with the manager on duty, and shortly, Marcie came over.

I explained that the piece was defective, that we didn't want it anymore, and that we wanted our money back. She looked at the piece and said that because I'd built it, they had to charge me the restocking fee because "they couldn't sell it like that". I asked her what other way besides building it she suggested to determine that the item was defective, and she had no good answer for that. I suggested that they assemble the piece there in the returns department, but she said no. They held their line firmly — I walked out with $140 of the $200 item we'd purchased.

So, I spent lots of time building this thing (twice) only to find out it was defective, and for my patience, sore back, and time spent loading and unloading it in our car, I am rewarded with a $60 charge.

The refund policy (the one featuring the graphic of the heart-shaped red pillow with outstretched arms) doesn't specify anything about defective merchandise nor does it indicate the restocking fee.

I feel like IKEA should at least refund my $60 since their product was defective. I'd like to do a corporate email carpet bomb. Any tips for locating IKEA management's email addresses?

A 30% restocking fee on a defective item seems like the sort of thing that should be disclosed in big bold letters.

What do you think? Should IKEA have waived the fee because the item was defective? Or was the fee fair because Drew didn't want the bookcase anyway?

(Photo:Sun Dazed)

fast forward 4 months - no word, so i call customer service. i get bounced to the national handling and they said they cannot find my report. (of course). and then they said they would need to "document" my case, so they were going to forward me to someone else. i got forwarded to anthony who said my problem was a "quality issue" which they do not handle over the phone. and he said i had to go back into the store to resolve it. i asked to be transfered to the store, so i could call them and not have to drive myself all the way over there to find out it is not in stock again. he said he could not connect me to the store because the store does not take calls from customers - that their purpose was to help in store customers only. i asked if i could get my case documented by him since that was why i was transfered to him in the first place and he said no, because it was a quality issue. so then i asked what kinds of cases does he document, and he said "not quality issues." wow, thank you for being so helpful. so i asked again if he could document anything for me so i at least had a record and he said my case was too old since i bought my sofa more than 90 days ago and he only handles cases that where purchase was within 90 days. so i asked, ok, if i had purchased my sofa within 90 days, then he would be able to handle it? and again he said no cause he handled purchases made within 90 days except for quality issues.

so i gave up on trying to understand what his job was and asked again if I could be connected to the person who had forwarded me to him. and he said no. i asked why not, and he said he didnt know who forwarded me to him. i asked him if he could query my name since i had given all my information to the person i had spoken to previously and he said that they do not track customer service calls, they only record them (what the...? huh? i dont believe that for a second especially since ikea is a multi-national behemoth. they must have a well developed call tracking system) so i asked if he could transfer me to anyone else and he said no, that i had to go into the store because it was a "quality issue" and no one in his call center handles "quality issues". i just do not understand how they could not call for me to even find out if my initial file was still there? is that too much to ask?

ikea sucks [Joyce Lan Kim]
(Photo: acshepard)

The result of this stunt is a website featuring short videos of Mark's adventures inside the IKEA that we felt were just little too irritating to actually watch, but maybe you'll like them.

Living in IKEA does sound sort of fun, though, we have to admit. That's probably why they're selling houses in Europe.

Man Lives At IKEA [CNN]
(Photo:CNN)

We often hear about people who are reluctant to purchase CFLs because they worry about having to dispose of them when they burn out (in about 7 years,) so we thought we'd mention this as an option for those of you who live near an IKEA.

If you have some laying around right now that you don't know what to do with, give them to IKEA!

IKEA
LampRecycle.org
(Photo:Shodts)

Swedish Math [One-Sided War]

(Photo:Thanks, Matt!)

A week after we moved and put the new covers on, our IKEA LILLBERG sofa broke. Right in half. The main support beam gave out right at the dovetail joint, and even split a board in the process. We were devastated, but figured that we'd be able to wrangle something out of it. Standard customer service would replace the couch, right?

My fianc e and I purchased a sofa from IKEA in August of 2006 for our new apartment in Bloomington, IN. We purchased it from the Bolingbrook, IL store because it was near her parents house, where she was staying until the move. It's a wood frame model with separate cushions, almost like a futon, but we appreciated it's minimalistic design and size - long and deep. The cushions also had removable covers, which was a feature that we liked. Fast forward to a year later, after we decide to move across town to a rental house. There's no way we can get the couch out of the door and we're afraid of damaging it, so I take it apart using the instructions that came with it. We assembled it in our new living room according to the same instructions and decided that when we took a trip back to Chicago that weekend, we'd spend all the IKEA giftcards we'd been saving up. We blew all $300 we had in giftcards on new furniture and then decided that as a treat we'd buy $60 worth of new covers for our sofa. Which was a mistake.

After calling about a bad zipper in a sofa cushion, I learned that IKEA's policy for returns and exchanges relies on going back to the original store that you bought the item from. So I called the Bolingbrook store and spoke with a standard customer service representative. This girl said that we'd have to bring it into the store, no other way to go about it, and once in the store, they'd be able to do a quality inspection of the item to make sure it wasn't just regular wear and tear. It was a bit frustrating, but prospects looked good. The main hurdle seemed to be to convince IKEA to ship us a replacement so that we wouldn't spend $150 in gas money to replace what is a $150 sofa frame - money that we didn't have to begin with.

I called back the next day and after getting the same spiel, I asked to speak with a supervisor. I told the supervisor the issue that we had, and how it was a near impossibility for us to get to the store. She agreed to let us send in photographs of the break, and asked us for the receipt information while informing us that the warranty was only good for thirty or ninety days (I don't remember which one it was). Which was our first problem. We didn't have the receipt. We're not sure if we threw it out after keeping it for a year, or if it just got mixed up in the move. We're assuming the latter since we're normally really responsible for this sort of thing.

I sent the supervisor photographs of the couch, and she responded asking for the receipt information. I asked her if she'd be able to look up the receipt information based on the credit card we used to purchase it and the date of the purchase - we had the bank statement since it was purchased with a debit/check card and we were able to see that information. She responded that she was unable to do this and would not be able to help us along any further without this information.

I should mention that throughout this whole process, I was formulating a Plan B. An Executive Email Carpet Bomb. With the help of countless Instant Messenger conversations with Ben Popken, I was getting closer and closer to developing a list of executives who might hear my plea. I had the basic email formula from when I emailed the customer service representative and submitted it to the Consumerist - good thing I did, because it turns out that the formula isn't used by higher ups. The day I decided to try and track down the names of IKEA executives was the day that The Consumerist broke the story of the corporate email addresses. So I formulated a letter and sent it off to the higher powers that be:

Dear IKEA,

I have been a very loyal customer. When I moved into my first apartment in Chicago, I spent four hundred dollars furnishing it with IKEA furniture. When I got engaged and my fianc e and I decided to move to Bloomington, IN, we spent at least four hundred more. We asked only for IKEA giftcards as Christmas presents and saved up for a year, so when we finally took a trip back to Chicago to visit her parents, we bought three hundred more dollars of IKEA furniture and products to furnish the house we moved into.

In the last purchase, we bought $60 worth of new cushion covers for the Lillberg model sofa. We have loved this sofa and had it for just about a year, when about two weeks ago it cracked. The main support beam underneath the cushions along the front of the couch broke in half down the dovetail joint and split one of the main support boards in the process. I've included thumbnail pictures of this break from all angles. We purchased this couch at the Bolingbrook, IL store in August of 2006, and were distraught because it is the only couch we own and we loved it so much that we spent sixty more dollars on cushion covers in order to preserve the couch for years to come.

I have been in contact with customer service at Bolingbrook, and was recently told that the only solution would be to bring the couch into the store with the original receipt. After asking to speak with a supervisor and explaining that I do not live near the Bolingbrook store anymore, I was told that I would be able to send in photos of the couch in an email and she would try to help us out. But since we have just moved again, we haven't been able to locate the original receipt. We contact the same customer service representative and asked if she would be able to look up our receipt information based on the card that we used to purchase it with, and she said that we had to have the original receipt or there was nothing that she could do for us.

By looking at the pictures, it's fairly obvious that it was a basic structural failure of the product. We did not abuse the couch or engage in any rough use. I even took it apart and gingerly transported the pieces separately when we moved in order to avoid any breakage. We were hoping that we could get a replacement sofa frame shipped to us, but have been unable to contact anyone who could help us. A couch that is advertised for every day use should not break in just a year of every day use.

We would gladly try to bring the couch to the store if we lived in the area. But as it stands, our house is located 249 miles from the Bolinbrook store, and to transport it there we would be spending about two hundred dollars in gas for a round trip in order to replace a two hundred dollar couch. If we had the four hundred dollars to spare, we would have just tried to replace the sofa on our own dime.

I am very happy with the IKEA products that we have purchased. The quality and the value have allowed us to furnish a home for a fraction of the cost at a traditional furniture store. At the same time, we appreciate the values that IKEA holds. That is why we have been returning customers after all of these years. It makes me worried, though, that we have been able to get this situation rectified. One of the reasons we felt safe in buying only IKEA furniture has been the helpful customer service that we've received in the past. We simply cannot afford to replace this sofa on our own at this moment, and if this situation is not resolved, we will have to think twice about the next furniture purchase we make.

I have included many different photos of the break, but can provide larger images if you are interested. I would also like to be contacted about this issue by August 28th. It has been weeks now since we haven't had a couch to sit on, and the sooner we can get this issue resolved, the better.

My phone number is _____________. I can also be contacted at jesse.raub@gmail.com.

Thank you for your patience and consideration,

Jesse Raub
____________
Bloomington, IN 47401
____________
jesse.raub@gmail.com

I tried to follow the basic tips I got from the last story about an IKEA EECB and from the posts about the book Unscrewed - I wanted to let them know that they'd be losing a lot of money from me as a customer. As I stated earlier, we spent $350 on our last trip, and at least $500-$800 in trips before that. Our tiny house resembles an IKEA shrine.

And a day later, I received a phone call from the Bolingbrook store manager. She asked me to recount my story and I did. And as soon as I had mentioned that I had moved to a new house in Bloomington, she insinuated that I may have damaged the couch in the move since they've never had any quality issues with the sofa before in the past. I reassured her that I took the couch apart and that I followed directions. She then implied that I must have put the couch together wrong and that it was my fault that it broke. She said that she would refuse to replace the couch, even if we took it into the store, even if we managed to dig up the receipt.

This was a shock. In our point of view, the entire time we were being told that the main issue was the distance from us and the store. We were fairly sure that replacement was inevitable, just not the free shipping. And to be honest, it was a bit insulting for her to tell me that it was my fault that the couch broke.

I was dejected, but got a letter from the IKEA corporate customer service branch a day later. This letter said that they would forward my information on to Bolingbrook and someone would contact me. The address was hand written, and the letter was personally signed. I thought, "Oh, this is great! These people actually care and will definitely care about how rudely I was treated!" I even had a documented case number and everything. On the letter was a phone number, 610- 834-0180 - the line that will connect you the IKEA corporate Customer Relations Managers.

Again, wrong. From what I've discovered, IKEA operates mainly as a franchise. All the stores function individually and almost independently from IKEA corporate, especially when it comes to customer service. I talked with one of the managers who pulled up my case information. I was ready to spew my whole story at her when she was able to re-cap it to me. All of my information was stored in the case and documented, and she was well briefed. She told me exactly what the Bolingbrook manager told me - they wouldn't replace the couch, however this lady was much sweeter in telling me so. She explained that it was basically up to the stores discretion on whether or not they would replace the couch, and how there was nothing she could do. She also explained that there have never been similar complaints about the couch, and that if there ever were, they'd open up my case again and contact me. I asked if we could purchase a new couch and get free shipping. She informed me that the store could not ship this far, and that IKEA corporate wouldn't be able to ship anything out either. And thus I was defeated. But not after spending 30 minutes on the phone repeating myself and trying to get her to budge an inch.

So what came out of this whole event? My advice to you if you ever need to contact IKEA customer service:

- Try calling the basic store. Start out easy - it might work

- Ask to speak to a supervisor. The supervisors are trained to be helpful - in fact, the call center supervisor was the only one who treated me with any sort of sympathy and attempted to help me.

- Try speaking to the Customer Relations manager.

- If none of that works, use the EECB. It will get their attention and somebody will contact you. At least you can get your case heard.

- ONLY TELL THEM THE BASIC FACTS. If I never said that I moved, they wouldn't be able to blame it on the move. However, I do believe they would have tried to blame it on something else, but I didn't need to offer that information before I was asked.

- If none of that works, try calling US Customer Relations and speak to an IKEA Corporate Customer Relations Manager, reached at 610-834-0180. They will create a case file for you, and it's their job to make sure that all customer service inquiries are resolved in some way, shape, or form.

- Be persistent. It might not work in the end, but at least you can't say that you never tried. I went all the way to the top and was denied. At least I know there was more than likely nothing else I could do.

After this debacle, I highly doubt I will be purchasing any other IKEA furniture. I've never had serious quality issues with the stuff in the past, but now I know that if I do, I'll be screwed out of my money and left couchless. As for the broken frame? My dad's coming down to visit us this Friday, and he's bringing a power drill. Let's see what sort of furniture hacking we can do.

Jesse did almost everything right, but In telling IKEA about his move, he gave them an excuse to deny his claim. Captured POWs need only give name, rank and serial number. The same principle applies in doing battle with customer service. Anything extra you give them can and will be used against you.

Also, he failed to at any point make it more costly for the original store to ignore you than to solve your problem. Consider the technique behind Company Ignoring You? Fax 'Em To Death, or How To Kick A Scammy Car Dealer In The Nuts. They work by making a simple argument any business owner can understand.

Then again, perhaps Jesse's next idea, getting a powerdrill and bolting the brace back together (bracing the brace is also an option), is the best, and one most in the IKEA spirit he enjoys so much.

Connect to IKEA US Customer Relations Manager Office and also pull up a company directory that goes off of the first three letters of the last name: 610-834-0180
Email addresses for US top management. The four letter system may work for other employees, or firstname.lastname@memo.ikea.com. Try both.

(Photo: jgodsey)

prenille lopez - President - opez@memo.ikea.com
hilde abbeloos - US Deputy - ilde@memo.ikea.com
lars ridoff - US Deputy - roff@memo.ikea.com
Frank Briel - Manager IKEA Stoughton - nkbr@memo.ikea.com
Gail Franc - Manager IKEA New Haven - ggf@memo.ikea.com
Mark E Mccaslin - Manager Ikea Canton - sacc@memo.ikea.com
Lars Meyer - Manager Ikea Long Island - lmww@memo.ikea.com
Max Urban Hedberg - Manager Ikea Bloomington - urba@memo.ikea.com
Patricia M Lobell - Manager Ikea Paramus - gips@memo.ikea.com
Robert Kay - Manager Ikea Elizabeth - bobk@memo.ikea.com
Heine Roikjer - IKEA West Sacramento - hnrj@memo.ikea.com
Jill Matherson - Manager IKEA East Palo Alto - jima@memo.ikea.com
Kenneth Bodeen - Manager IKEA Portland - kbod@memo.ikea.com
Laurie Helm - Manager IKEA Seattle - pelh@memo.ikea.com
Michael La Cour - Manager IKEA Orlando - MILC@memo.ikea.com
Michael O'Rourke - Manager IKEA East Bay - mor@memo.ikea.com
Peter Steinweg - Manager IKEA Sunrise - pweg@memo.ikea.com
Jenifer Woods - Legal: Service Office USA - erds@memo.ikea.com
Tracey Kelly - US Leadership Service Office USA - trak@memo.ikea.com

(Photo: Odhran)

firstname.lastname@memo.ikea.com

RELATED: Executive E-Mail Carpet Bomb Scores Direct Hit On IKEA
(Photo: Nick2588)

Dear IKEA:

I would like to preface this letter by saying that I am normally not a difficult customer. Having worked in retail and customer service for several years, and now being employed as a professional marketer for a multi-national manufacturing company, I understand the challenges that face stores and staff when dealing with the public.

However, the customer service that I have received of late from IKEA has warranted this unfortunate letter.

I have almost entirely furnished my house with IKEA products. My wife and I enjoy them very much. On top of the high quality and great look of your furniture, we find it to be a fun and bonding experience every time we assemble a set of drawers or a shelf. Our bedroom set is all Hemnes. The only thing we are missing are two bedside tables, which is the purpose of this letter. The ones we have not been able to get are the black-brown tables which cost $69.99.

About two months ago, my wife and I went to the North York store to browse for a bedroom set. Having settled on Hemnes, we were told that the entire bedroom set was available, except for the two bedside tables. We were told they would be in stock in "about two weeks". So we decided to wait on everything and come back with a friend's truck to buy the entire set.

When we came back a month later, on July 6, we were again told that the bedside tables were not in stock. They would be here next week, we were told. We took everything else, except for the set of six drawers, which also suddenly were not in stock.

We returned to the store on July 13 to buy the bedside tables and set of six drawers. Again, the bedside tables were not in stock, but the set of six drawers was. However, the store staff would not sell us the drawers, because they were "too high" - meaning the staff refused to get the product down from a shelf for us to buy them. (I know that this is either a safety precaution, or the drawers were simply not in inventory yet. Regardless, we should have been sold the drawers.) We were told to come back the next day. We did, and though we were allowed to purchase the drawers, the tables were still out of stock. We were told, after expressing slight displeasure to one of the store staff, that we shouldn't worry; the tables will be in stock in a few days.

Now, I'm not sure why we were being told incorrect information about the bedside tables. The internet indicated that the stores did not have them in stock, but we assumed that the store staff would have accurate information, even if it contradicted the inventory finder on the website. Perhaps we should have checked further, but I gave the store staff the benefit of the doubt. I decided to call before coming into the store again, on July 20, and I was told that the tables were not in stock, and I should keep waiting.

On July 23, I decided to call IKEA customer service. My feeling was, and still is, that we have tried several times to purchase the bedside tables in the store, and since we have been unable to do so, we should be exempt from paying the shipping charges, especially considering the amount of aggravation we have experienced so far. I waited on hold for nearly fifteen minutes before I was transferred to a real person. Obviously, the front-line staff are not able to discount shipping, so I asked to speak with a manager. I waited five additional minutes, and when the person came back, I was told that a manager would call me back within 24 hours. I left my phone number and waited.

I did not get a call back. I called again on July 26 and was put on hold without speaking to anyone. I waited on hold for twelve minutes and hung up - I had another matter to attend.

I called on July 31 and waited to speak with someone. When a person did answer the phone after about ten minutes, I was told a manager would call me back. I told the person that I had already waited, but I was reassured that this time, someone would call me back. No one did.

I called again today. I waited for another fifteen minutes to speak to someone. I immediately asked to speak with a manager, and the person on the phone said that someone would call me back in 24-48 hours. I refused this, and demanded to speak to a manager immediately. The person did argue, to try to get me off the phone, but I was insistent that I speak to someone today. Finally a "manager" picked up the phone, however, she began the conversation by indicating that she is a "customer service" manager and not a "sales" manager. I'm sure this is a significant distinction in your organization, but when I ask to speak with a manager, I assume that the person would be able to affect change. This was not the case.

The "customer service" manager - I'm sorry, I did not get her name - reiterated company policy as if reading from a book. I now know that you do not negotiate on shipping. I know that the store inventory has nothing to do with the phone/internet inventory. I was also told that I should have checked the internet for stock status, and when I told her that I did, I was told that I should call to confirm, and when I told her that I did, she said that the internet was not always 100% accurate. I was so confused by this, I dropped that line of conversation - it just didn't make any sense.

As far as I am concerned, I know that the bedside tables are in Canada, though not in the stores. As far as I am concerned, I have traveled to the stores and checked the website more than enough times. As far as I am concerned, IKEA is IKEA whether ordering in the store or by phone or internet.

I'm not asking for a lot. I'm asking that you send me the two bedside tables, to my house, without charging me shipping. It's the only fair thing to do. I would like the escalation of this situation to end here.

I would like to receive a phone call by Tuesday, August 7. I will provide you with my credit card number for the total retail price of the two tables ($69.99 x 2 plus taxes), and you will ship them to me, excluding the shipping charges.

With all of the business that my wife and I have given IKEA over the years, I do expect this matter to be resolved to my satisfaction in a timely fashion. I estimate that we have spent in excess of $10,000 on IKEA products over the years. This is a small amount of money to you; it is significant to us.

You are welcome to phone me or email me for additional information. However, my request to have the two products delivered to me without shipping charges will stand.

Please do what's right.

Kind regards,

Inderjit

....
Within thirty minutes of sending that email, three people phoned me back from IKEA:

• Debbie, the Corporate Communications Manager and Assistant to the President. She also emailed me to follow up on her phone call
• Renata, the Customer Service Manager at the Call Centre in Montreal.
• Marlon, the Assistant Manager of Customer Service at the local store at which I normally shop.
• 
  After speaking to Debbie, Renata, and Marlon, a resolution has been found. I will be receiving the products in question on Sunday, and I was not charged for shipping. It's all I've asked for all along. Also, my wife and I will continue shopping at IKEA.

• Wrote clearly and directly
• Exhausted normal avenues of resolution
• Made specific, reasonable, demands linked to specific service deficiencies
• Set a deadline for action
• 
  For a bomb, the EECB is remarkably simple to construct and launch. Directions can be found in our handy guide, How To Launch An Executive Email Carpet Bomb.
  (Photo: Getty)

IKEA is opening up a "hostel" for shoppers who need to stay and extra day to finish their shopping. There will even be a bridal suite. From the Guardian:

"It will be like an alternative hostel," said company spokesman Frode Ullebust.

"There will be the regular dormitory with lots of beds stacked up together. We will also have a bridal suite, with a round bed and a hanging chandelier, and the luxury suite, where customers can enjoy breakfast in bed," he said. Family rooms will also be available for parents and children to join into the Ikea fun. None of the guests will be charged for their stay.
...
"The shop opens at 10am so if they are lazy, people might get woken up by shoppers testing out their mattresses," said Mr Ullebust.

Customers will also be able to take their bedsheets home afterwards. "It's a nice souvenir," he added, "We will also give them bathrobes with the Ikea Hostel logo on, and some slippers, so they won't get cold at night."

Check in to the Ikea bridal suite for a flat-pack honeymoon [Guardian via BoingBoing]
(Photo:Ben Popken)

Reader Amara was trying to buy a couch. The couch was out of stock. IKEA said they'd order the couch from another store. So Amara waited. And waited. And waited.

Amara writes:

Question: What recourse do you ask for in a formal written complaint when you have not had a monetary loss? We're going through a customer service ordeal with IKEA and - had we gotten the correct information at the time - we would have just gone to the Target down the street to get our couch.

Should we return the couch in protest? Keep the couch and demand a discount? Demand store credit? Or is an apology all we can hope for?

The Story: During the 4th of July weekend, my husband and I went to IKEA to buy our long-awaited couch. We had sold our old one when we moved apartments and went to North Africa before we could get around to buying another one. Back from our globe-trotting, we though the Saturday holiday would be a great time to go our normally packed South Philly store.

We picked out the Mysinge loveseat ($340 frame + cover) and then went to the customer service island to place our order. In hindsight, I should've known it was all a bad idea. The guy was young and looked as if he wished he were down at the shore.

He woke up enough to tell us our couch was out of stock but we could place an order and have it shipped to the store. He told us it would arrive by the 19th at the latest. We decided we could handle sitting on the floor of our living room for 12 days or less. He said they would give us a call when the couch arrived and asked for day and evening contact information. We paid for everything and left.

By the 17th, sitting on the floor was starting to feel not so Zen anymore so I called IKEA South Philly. The woman happily assured me, without feeling the need to check the order, the couch would be there by the 19th but they might need a day or two to sort out the shipment. And then she hung up.

By the 21st, our collective backsides were killing us so I called IKEA South Philly and asked why I hadn't gotten a call yet about our couch. This time the woman looked up my order and said it wasn't there. Then she told me that the 19th was just the estimated delivery date and that the original customer service guy should have told us that our order could take two to three weeks OR MORE. Had we known that, we wouldn't have bought the couch there.

I escalated to the manager who was apologetic but explained that there was nothing they could do. They were shipping our couch all the way from New Jersey! He reassured me that I would get a call when it did arrive.

On the 27th, I wanted to find out if we would spend yet another weekend on the floor waiting for THE CALL. The IKEA South Philly guy checked my order and told me our couch was, in fact, at their location. I asked 1) how long it had been there and 2) why I hadn't been called. He checked with the South Philly store manager and replied 1) they had no idea and 2) because they don't call people unless the customer specifically asks them to on the order form and our order form had no such notation. The order form does have my phone numbers on it but that's apparently beside the point.

I escalated to the store manager who told me that calling a customer was "just a courtesy" and since I didn't request be called I wasn't called. I explained again that the original customer service person said we were going to get our couch in 12 day and they would call us when it arrrived.

I expressed my frustration that I'd had four different interactions with four different explanations. During the second call, both a representative and a manager looked at the account and told me I was going to be called when the couch eventually arrived. Why didn't they notice I didn't have the apparently necessary "call me" note if it's so important? The store manager was apologetic and seemed genuinely surprised when I asked for the address to make a formal complaint.

IKEA Attn: Customer Service Department 9930 Franklin Square Drive Baltimore, MD 21236

Now what? What form of recourse should I ask for in my complaint? What can I reasonably expect from this kind of situation?

Philosophy #1) By buying from discount places, you take the risk of getting crappy customer service. Sometimes you will save money and you will be happy. Other times you will be annoyed and mad. This is the price you pay for being a cheapskate and shopping at places that don't give a crap about you, don't offer health care to their workers, cut costs at every opportunity, and/or otherwise do not offer "customer service." This is also known as the "Greater Walmart F*ckwad Theory."

Philosophy #2) IKEA should compensate you because they save boatloads of money by cutting customer service costs. If they screw up really badly, they should be able to throw you a gift card or something after they're done rolling in their ill-gotten gains.

Here's what you're guaranteed to get from writing a complaint letter—peace of mind. You'll feel a lot better.

And you just might get something more out of it. Maybe a gift card. We think it's not a wasted effort to write a letter just because you're mad.

All you can lose is the cost of paper and a stamp. Ask IKEA what they are willing to do to keep you as a customer. If the answer is "nothing," then you'll know to take your business elsewhere.

What do you think would be fair compensation for Amara's troubles?

(Photo:scentzilla)

• AKURUM kitchen wall cabinets into a sideboard.
• Electroluminescent wire as stairway light.
• Sliding wardrobe doors into a small apartment room divider.
• BJ RNUM shelves as minimalist cat furniture.
• SNACK boxes into power cord/battery charger hider.
• SMYCKA dried plants into a garden gate.
• RAMBERG bedside table and a spare board into a coffee table.

Items for the bathroom like Apskar (a wash basin), Toftbo (a bathroom mat), and Sanni (a bath sheet) are named after Scandanavian lakes, rivers and bays—that seems appropriate.

Stuff for kids is named after mammals, birds, and adjectives. So if you buy your children a Smyg, they're getting a lamp named for a wren. And a child's desk is Fartful, which of course means "speedy" in Swedish.

For the full run-down, Wikipedia has all the answers.

Unraveling the IKEA product naming mystery [a hundred moneys] (Thanks to c-side!)

IKEA hacker has laptop desks or holders created from a sawed-off stool, a paper towel holder (weird), and a kitchen shelf. We like the stool one, personally. It costs $19. The one he was copying cost $150. Win.

need a laptop desk? diy your own stand [IKEA hacker]
(Photo: IKEA hacker)

1. IKEA lives on add-on sales, and where they make their money. The stores are designed to get you though every department, but there are shortcuts. Use them liberally; ask for the fastest way to where you need to go. There's a ton of cheap stuff along the way for you to grab, and it adds up fast. Before you check out, evaluate what's in your cart and if you really need/ want it and you'll save a good chunk of cash. Also, in the first showroom area, avoid what's called the 'open the wallet' area- tons of small, cool, cheap stuff you can grab- it gets you in the buying mood, and 'opens your wallet'. Everything there is duplicated later on, so if you see something really cool, write it down and look for it later.

2. The 30-day return policy is (sort of) a lie. IKEA will generally return stuff like wal-mart (but should not be confused with that evil place), so keep receipts if at all possible. And if anything is wrong with the product, take it apart and bring it backw. Be sure to check the boxes for damage before you check out.

3. Go midweek, even in the evening. Particularly if you're buying a lot of stuff. It's slower, and coworkers are going to be more available and willing to help.

4. IKEA sells tons of cheap crap, but the higher priced stuff is well worth the money, lasts for a long time and usually carries a warranty.

5. Just because something isn't on the shelf doesn't mean it's not in stock. Note the article number shown on the tag, and find someone at an info station (or walking around) and have them look it up. If it's out of stock, there is usually info on when it's coming in. Note: most peons won't know all of this, so if they don't know or are confused, seek the almighty duty manager. They can find out (and might give you free stuff. Ask). If the item is truly out of stock, and there is no delivery info (which means it's 4-6 weeks out, minimum), they can sell you the floor model, BUT at full retail price. At this point, be on your best behavior, and ask if there's any way at all it can be discounted, because of that scratch or whatever (remember: be nice. If you're a dick, they won't help you after this). What can be done if you play your cards right is this: They'll send you, item on flat cart, to the as-is department. While you're on your way down, they'll call and tell them Jane Doe is on her way with article 503.243.22 from the sales floor, and can you give them an as-is price on it? Once there, they'll mark it down some for you and you're good to go. NOTE: Once something becomes as-is, it's just that- you can't return it, no matter what, so make sure you want it.

6. If you're buying lots of stuff (e.g., kitchens, home office, furnishing whole house): buy in stages. This way you can use your (friend's) truck, instead of delivery (which is by the piece). Also, when pieces come up with missing parts or damaged, you're already going back, so you don't have to get all upset about making another trip. Also, when doing this, talk to a few people in (workIKEA, kitchens, whichever department) to get to know them and their knowledge of the product, so when you come back, you know who to talk to (when I worked in kitchens, a few customers asked my schedule for the next week so they'd come in when I was there. Not that I'm so great, it just meant I knew their order, what they were doing, and they wouldn't explain every time they came in. It always turned out well for them).

7. Missing parts are the bane of everyone's IKEA experience. The following steps are the best way to resolve this: A) Know what you need. Each screw, peg, etc, has a part number. This is found on the first page of the instructions. Also, each item has an 8 article number, printed right next to the bar code. Knowing these two numbers will save you tons of time.
B) call your local store. Do NOT speak with the operator; they usually won't do you any good. Ask for either the department it's from (Living rooms, kitchens, etc) or the recovery department.
C) Tell them the article number and they'll look up the product, and can pull up its instructions (if you're missing the instructions, they can also print them out and mail them to you), and the part number you need. They can then mail it to you.

8. If you're having problems with a CSR ('coworker') politely ask to speak with the duty manager. They have to call them. Managers at IKEA usually live and breathe IKEA and will do anything to keep you happy. So get the manager, explain your situation, and they'll bend over backwards for you.

(Photo: Ben Popken)

I had originally asked the IKEA in Paramus, N.J., to deliver my kitchen cabinets on a Saturday. I later found out that my Manhattan co-op building prohibited large deliveries on the weekend, so when the truck arrived on the designated day, the crew couldn't unload their cargo. IKEA billed me for the delivery. Totally fair—I goofed.

That's when I slipped off IKEA's radar. After checking with my contractor's schedule, I called the store and asked them to deliver my cabinets about a week later, on a Tuesday. No problem, they said.

Tuesday came and went. No delivery was made.

This is our favorite part of his story:

A customer-service representative said she'd check and put me on hold.

After 10 minutes, I hung up and tried to reach another customer service rep. This time I demanded to be transferred to the home delivery department. The rep refused, insisting that, "I'm trained to assist you with your problem." The unintentional hilarity of her comment eased the tension, so I took a deep breath and explained my situation to her. But she, too, put me on hold.

Another several minutes went by before I hung up and gave it another shot. This time I managed to snag a customer-service supervisor. Through gritted teeth, I recounted my delivery woes yet again. She looked up my order and found no record of the Monday delivery request. I choked the handset.

The IKEA representative said that IKEA is "always looking at our systems to see what's working and what's not working,'' Liss says. "If it's not working, it's certainly our responsibility to make it work. It's our goal to not only meet but exceed our customers' expectations." She asked consumers to call 1-800-434-IKEA and tell them how they're doing. —MEGHANN MARCO

Waiting (And Waiting) For IKEA [Forbes]

(Photo: Ben Popken)

RELATED: IKEA's Inventory System Has Problems
IKEA Won't Sell "In-Stock" Mattress Because It Requires The Forklift?

angelique's pretty storage chests [IKEA Hacker]
Aoneko's (Angelique) Blog
(Photo: Aoneko)

I hired a guy off of craigslist to help me assemble all of the furniture, given the fact that we had 3 rooms to assemble. This turns into a 2 day ordeal, with a ton of missing parts and us having to document it to call Ikea later. We get to several items such as the desk, which is missing so many parts it's un-assemblable.

We have 8 foot tall cabinets that are a bit rickety and missing hinges, 3 solid bookshelves and a number of missing parts for the desk, kitchen table and sofa.

December brought several parts, but still no legs for the desk. Oz's girlfriend also noticed that the curved desk, which sat unassembled, was not the right-handed desk they had ordered, but a left-handed desk.

Oz's email, below.

My girlfriend and I placed a sizable order for Ikea furniture in Early September 2005. I'm not sure if you're aware of how this works, but typically you spend 30 - 50 minutes on the phone with a somewhat lingustically challenged sales representative to file your order. After selecting a desk, 3 large clothes cabinets, a sofa, kitchen tables, chairs, bookshelves, organizational stuff and some kitchen items we are given a total of ~$1800 with $400 in shipping. Satisfied, we are told that a delivery company will call us within 2 - 3 weeks to schedule. I ask for a fax of the order which doesn't come through. Salesperson: Belinda

The next day I call again for a fax of the order - which I am assured will be sent in 15 - 30 minutes of my call. When I arrive home - it's not there. I assume they're a bit backwards and chalk it up to corporate ineptitude.

Two weeks later we call to check on the order, since we haven't heard from the delivery company.. Ikea cannot find the order and we are passed through a series of beligerent CSRs who actually yell at me and tell me I'm lying (about the order).We finally get to a supervisor after 15 minutes on the phone, at which point my girlfriend is in tears (and still without furniture).

The supervisor "finds" the original order but says it cannot be reprocessed and has to be resubmitted. We spend another 25 minutes on the phone going through each piece, continually asking to confirm if we need hinge kits, assembly screws, etc. At several points we are reassured that their "system" adds the required assembly hardware and adds it to the cost. After completing the order and waiting on the phone for a total call time of 65 minutes we get a credit card confirmation and order number. "All of your pieces are in stock except for the kitchen chairs" we're then told - which requires a seperate order number and additional wait. We figure all is well.

Mind you - delivery time is 2 - 3 weeks from the date of order. 3 weeks later we get a call and the furniture is delivered in late October.

I hired a guy off of craigslist to help me assemble all of the furniture, given the fact that we had 3 rooms to assemble. This turns into a 2 day ordeal, with a ton of missing parts and us having to document it to call Ikea later. We get to several items such as the desk, which is missing so many parts it's un-assemblable.

We have 8 foot tall cabinets that are a bit rickety and missing hinges, 3 solid bookshelves and a number of missing parts for the desk, kitchen table and sofa.

I call Ikea and lodge a complaint. I'm transferred to aftersales and they ensure me all parts will be fedexed within a week. A shipment arrives in mid-november, however I'm still missing assembly parts for the desk and kitchen table.

I call again the third week in November and Ikea assures us that the legs and other parts will be shipped. A curt apology is given.

Early December: the parts arrive - but I am still missing the proper number of legs required to assemble the desk. My girlfriend also notices (she wasn't party to assembly anytime prior) that the desk curves the wrong way - basically Ikea shipped us a left hand desk when we needed a right hand desk.

I call Ikea the following Monday ( I should mention that aftersales is only open Monday through Friday) and spoke with a man in aftersales who said that the proper tabletop would be shipped out in 2 - 3 weeks. He also re-entered the legs as missing and noted that the legs would be shipped UPS and the tabletop would come freight ( 2 - 3 weeks).

Jan 5, 2007: I called Ikea to inquire about the tabletop. I am transferred to 2 departments (35 minute hold) before being transferred to Adrian in aftersales. I explain my situation to her and she cannot find any record of the re-order. I am given a lecture on Ikeas 30 day response policy on damaged and missing parts. I inform her that the table wasn't shipped and get a second lecture where I'm yelled at about their policies and procedures. Unable to get a word in edgewise, I ask if the legs were shipped. Adrian confirms a UPS shipment for which I ask for a signature confirmation. (we never recieved the legs) She starts to belittle me and again yells. I tell her to calm down and ask for a supervisor. She responds that she "is" a supervisor, so I ask for an escalation point. She responds that I have to write a letter to corporate and puts me on hold to get the address.

I am on hold for 10 minutes, during which I google Ikea; find the CEO's information in Sweden; locate their customer relations address and sit and wait...

Adrian comes back apologizing for the wait and says that the offices have just "moved" and gives me the same addresss I found online.

I ask if there is an ombudsman in the US, to which Adrian responds "what's his name". I explain what an ombudsman is and she says no - not here....

I ask again about the legs and get a loud rhetoric on what ikeas policies are, she also informs me that since it's past 30 days from the original order they will not exchange the tabletop. I tell her to calm down, which gets her into a tirade - unable to ask anything I say can you give me the UPS number.. she continues to evade, yells at me and hangs up.

I now have to write a letter and try and reverse charges with my credit card company,

HELP!

We asked around the unloading dock if anyone had jumpers but nobody piped up. An employee directed us to a customer service reception area. We handed them our license and they gave us a portable car jumper kit.

As we trudged through the snow to go do the job ourselves, we thought with a grin, "This is so IKEA."

Don't get us wrong, we enjoyed jumping the car, it's just amusing that the ethos behind the self-assembly business model trickles all the way down to the parking lot.

— BEN POPKEN
(Photo)