he doesn’t have ebola

(Louis Abate)

Cleaning Supply Sales Are Up As Americans Freak Out Over Ebola

Ebola is a terrifying disease affecting parts of Western Africa right now, and some health care workers who cared for an infected visitor to Dallas from Liberia without being provided proper infection control equipment are being treated or quarantined for the disease. Naturally, this means that it is time for a nationwide freakout wherein we stock up on disinfectants and treat everyone with suspicion. [More]

(YouTube)

Here’s What It Looks Like After Someone Shouts “I Have Ebola, You’re All Screwed!” On A Plane

You know the saying about how you should never yell “Fire!” in a theater? Let’s bring that maxim up to date, and amend it to add that you should also refrain from shouting, “I have Ebola, you’re all screwed!” on an airplane. Because that will result in the hazardous materials folks showing up and generally spoiling an entire planeful of people’s plans for an uneventful flight. [More]