Motorized Shopping Carts Are Not For Drunken Shoplifting

If you’re going to make a daring escape from a grocery store after a dessert shoplifting spree, it’s probably wise to use something other than one of the store’s own motorized shopping carts. It didn’t end well for an Alaska man who tried to do just that at a Fred Meyer store last week. [More]


English Grocery Store Offers Venison Special: Severed Deer Head At Checkout

You can encounter the weirdest stuff at the grocery store in the wee hours of the morning, but you probably haven’t seen anything weirder than what turned up in the self-checkout aisle of one of UK grocer Tesco’s stores at 1:30 in the morning: the severed head of a deer. [More]

Too Bad You Missed This Amazing Members-Only Sale At Safeway

You missed it? Too bad.

“Man oh man, I’m sure glad that we have a Safeway Club Member loyalty card!” writes reader Richard. Even if you have a card, dearest readers, you’re going to miss out: the sale ended on Saturday. [More]

Fuzzy Math: Why You Should Always Check Unit Prices

Fuzzy Math: Why You Should Always Check Unit Prices

Most of the time, when a vendor understands retail logic and basic math, an item costs less per unit when you buy more of it. Sometimes, due to errors or sale prices, things cost more per unit when you buy more. We call this phenomenon “Fuzzy Math,” and laugh at it. Reader K. found this great example of such fuzziness at a Harris Teeter store, where customers who buy the larger box are seriously missing out. [More]


Publix Feels Really Bad That They Decorated Your Cake With A Bug, Delivers New One

You might have had some nice celebrations this weekend, but we’d guess that none of them had the shocking level of true Above and Beyond customer service that karen experienced at a cookout on Saturday. Something as tiny as an insect can totally ruin the party, when that insect is a dead gnat lodged in the frosting of your birthday carrot cake. [More]


Man Jailed For Rubbing Pepperoni On His Weiner At Grocery Store

Earlier this week, a northern New York man was caught doing a terrible, terrible thing to an innocent stick of pepperoni. He was arrested and put behind bars…not just for lewd behavior in public in a Hannaford store, but because they had to destroy the pepperoni he had defiled afterward. [More]


Kroger Uses Infrared Cameras To Cut Customer Wait Times

My first job was at a mom-and-pop grocery store. We normally had only one checkout line open, but if things backed up, someone would just hop on the other register and the logjam would ease. Seems like a simple enough concept, but apparently too simple for a supermarket chain like Kroger, which has turned to high-tech infrared cameras to improve its customers’ wait times. [More]

Maybe Safeway Has Seceded From The United States


Marc noticed this onion sign at Safeway, which is a grocery chain. So are were these vegetables imported? Are they from the USA? Did Marc secretly pass through a wormhole and end up in an alternate-universe Safeway where his state has seceded from the United States, or just this Safeway? Maybe all Safeways have seceded, and this is how they’re letting us know. [More]

(Northwest dad)

4 Things That Make You Spend Too Much Money At The Grocery Store

Roaming the aisle of the grocery store can sometimes feel like walking around in a big money pit. Sure, everyone needs food to survive, but does it have to end up costing an arm and a leg every time you make a trip to stock up on your weekly necessities? If you’re walking out shaking your head and wondering how it all piles up, you can probably chalk it up to a few reasons. [More]

What is this wonderful, sugary field you speak of?

According To This Sign, Someone Working At Food Lion Needs To Go Back To Biology Class

There are some food groups that are debatable. Eating a pizza? That’s gettin in your dairy and vegetables, sure, we’ll accept that. But there are other designations which we are pretty sure are non-negotiable, and this Food Lion in North Carolina might need to give employees a bit of a brush-up. For example, the biological meaning behind what “fresh” and “field” and growing things means. [More]

Good Cook gift package

Our Dish Brush Breaks, Good Cook Sends Gift Box Of Kitchen Stuff To Apologize

Peet isn’t normally one to share customer experiences, but had such a stunning experience with a company recently that he had no choice. What happened?
Well, his dishwashing brush broke with four refills left, so he contacted the company to ask if replacement handles were available. He was impressed when they promised to send a replacement. Then the box arrived.


What’s In A Name? Express Checkout Lanes Are Actually (Gasp!) A Waste Of Time

Express! That means fast, right? If you make a beeline for the express checkout lane at the grocery store any time you only have a few items, you might want to reconsider. Apparently there are other issues with the express line that can make the whole experience take almost as long as a regular lane, or in some cases, your wait could be even greater. [More]

(CBS 5)

Is 98% Price Accuracy Acceptable For Grocery Stores?

Odds are that you’ve been overcharged at some point in your life. Mistakes happen. The big question is: Is there any acceptable level of overcharging? [More]


Dairy Industry Worried That The Answer To “Got Milk?” These Days Is: “Nope.”

Back in milk’s heyday, the cool thing to do in a commercial was proudly wear a white mustache and smirk, “Got Milk?” The idea being, if you didn’t, you weren’t being healthy, as milk was the reigning drink in the health food arena. All you had to do was drink a glass a day and you could claim that yes, you had milk. But with all the energy drinks and enhanced waters flooding the market these days, dairy farmers are worried they’re losing their audience. [More]


Trying To Get Out Of A Busy Grocery Store Quickly Is Just Tempting Fate

Yesterday, we shared the heartwarming story of a Harris Teeter supermarket that let customers leave with carts full of free groceries and not force them to wait around for the registers to start working again. Yesterday evening, sort of the exact opposite of that happened to Dina when she tried to get through her shopping trip to Giant quickly by using the self-scan station. Trying to get out of a crowded grocery store “quickly” is tempting fate, doesn’t Dina know that?! [More]

This innocent family has NO IDEA their favorite breakfast foods have been moved. None.

Lender’s Introduces The Baker’s Half-Dozen: Five Bagels

Kroger is ever so thoughtful. Maybe a little creepy, too. Michael received an e-mail from the grocer notifying him that a product he’s bought in the past–Lender’s frozen bagels–won’t be available anymore. That’s sad, but we’re sure that he’ll muddle through somehow. “Nice to know they’re concerned about our finding products we’ve shopped for….” he writes. [More]

Perhaps Grocery Store Should Reconsider This Sign's Placement

Perhaps Grocery Store Should Reconsider This Sign's Placement

After all the mislabeled, unfortunately worded, bad math-y and otherwise plain wrong signs we’ve seen, we’re convinced that all retail establishments should hire an official Sign Executive dedicated to making sure these slip-ups don’t happen. [More]

Save Me From The Supermarket Light Pollution Menace

Save Me From The Supermarket Light Pollution Menace

Until a few months ago, Chris didn’t mind sharing a fence with a grocery store. Being able to scoot next door to pick up a few items would be pretty convenient. Then the lights came on. Two terrible, bright, glaring parking lot lights. They shine in his windows, illuminating his bedroom to an extent that even the thickest curtains can’t block. The lights are, of course, on 24/7. The store manager promises to solve the situation, but no solution is in sight. The only things in sight are those parking lot lights. Those bright, bright parking lot lights. What would the Consumerists do? [More]