How Robots Are Killing Customer Service

I spotted a tote bag for Bear Stearns, the investment bank that recently nearly collapsed and JP Morgan Chase purchased, on sale outside a used goods store here in Brookyln. No doubt it was pawned off by one of the many recently liquidated Bear Stearns employees in the New York area (hey, that Tivo doesn't pay for itself). I didn't check the price tag, but it was probably more than $10, which is more than can be said for a share of Bear Stearns stock. Note the new Chase bank sign reflected into the store window.

(Photo: Ben Popken)

How To Become A "Brand Strategist"

Don't Believe The Hypebeast gives a mock tutorial on how to become a "brand strategist," basically some white douche who figures out how to make brands and products appeal to that fabled white unicorn, youth culture endowed with ungodly amounts of disposable income.

1. To be an influential and successful youth culture brand strategist, you're going to need to be a White male, preferably with an affluent upbringing, but with a penchant for rap music and 80's punk. Don't have that particular penchant? Wikipedia that shit!

So You Wanna Be A Brand Strategist? [Don't Believe The Hypebeast]
(Photo: TheeErin)

Protesters Taunt Goldman Sachs Employees By Singing "Frosty The Goldman" Outside Company Christmas Party

Slumlord Dermot Company Finally Installs Boiler

Huzzah! Dan's quest to not live in an icecube has succeeded. He writes:

The boiler's been replaced and I've had consistent heat and hot water since xmas. Now i just have this unholy clanking coming from the steam pipe every morning b/t 3 and 5 am which jolts me from my bed in fear that its about to explode and take me with it. The super says hopefully it will get resolved this week.

And despite the fact that I'm fairly certain that, for my troublemaking, Dermot will either price me out of my apartment or fail to renew my lease come august, I can take some solace in the fact that the elderly people in my building now treat me like a local hero for getting Dermot to cave in a way they had never been able to.

Last we checked, Daniel's NYC apartment didn't have any heat and he had to call his supervisor whenever he wanted to take a shower. Now there's been some developments as the powerful love of Consumerist exposure melts the heart of the Dermot Company, aka, Snowmiser. Dan writes:

Dec 13th
On Monday, I returned home from work to discover an unexpected message from the city building inspector tucked under my door, stating that he had come to check on my heat and hot water, but that, since I wasn't home, he'd check things out in a neighboring apartment.

I had no idea what would come of this notice, but then two days later (this evening to be precise), another notice appeared under my door announcing that Dermot will be replacing our now infamously busted boiler next Monday...

Wipe Your Butt With Designer Toilet Paper By Renova

Renova is selling the first "fashionable" toilet paper, available in four designer colors: Black, Red, Orange, and Green. Their catalog copy reads, "A voluptuous texture. Colors for an outstanding style. A warm mystery in every single olfactive moment. Soft and glamorous...A paper full of pleasure."

Trendwatching says it's part of the consumer trend of "premiumization," whereby every product is available in "upgraded" form. Think premium vodkas, where you pay $10 more just to have a fancy backstory in a pretty bottle, and apply that mentality to every consumer good.

Renova... now you can talk out of your ass and wipe it at the same time!

Maybe Landlord Will Fix Ceiling After It Collapses?

After cleaning black mold off the ceiling daily with bleach for about two months and pleading with the new landlord, he sent the pseudo-super, who barely speaks English, to fix the leak in my bathroom.

After ripping down the almost collapsed ceiling and the neighbor's kitchen floor, the guy discovered at least three different leaks, all converging on my ceiling.

Coldest Day Of Year. No Heat On. Thanks, Slumlord Dermot Company.

The roach situation has improved, but Daniel still has to call the super every time he wants to take a shower. Also, on Sunday, when it was 21 degrees in New York, he didn't have any heat until 6pm.

At the end of October, Daniel wrote us about the troubles he, and all the other tenants, were having with their building's shady management company, Dermot Company. After his story posted here, Dermot called him, "jumping through hoops to kiss my ass," as Daniel put it. He asked us to refrain from posting the news to make sure that they weren't just making kissy kissy nice nice to put out the bad PR. We agreed, and Daniel's instincts proved correct.

His update, inside...

I lost my 30 day unlimited MetroCard over the holiday weekend. Happily, a friend told me the MTA will replace it if it was purchased with a credit or debit card, which it was. However, since calling the handy replacement number on the MTA's web site for THREE DAYS IN A ROW and holding anywhere from 100-150 minutes each time, I'm not so sure. Have other people in New York dealt with this? I understand the MTA is probably like your average DMV when it comes to efficiency, but this is just plain ridiculous. My lunch money is dwindling with each $2.00 trip to—and from—work.

Stuck With Dermot Management, A Modern-Day Slumlord

A reader writes:

A major NYC real estate corp [Dermot Management] is seriously fucking its tenants, myself included, and I just signed my lease a week ago and am now stuck with these bastards.

I just moved into an apartment at 121 Seaman Ave., in the Inwood neighborhood of Manhattan.

The property is managed by the Dermot Company, which has been snatching up properties all around New York City and providing broker free rentals through sites like Rent-Direct.com, which is where I found my apartment.

The apartment seemed like a steal: A lot of space, a pretty nice building, a decent neighborhood (if far as hell from all civilization) and a reasonable rent. However, upon moving in to my new apartment, I made a few alarming discoveries: My kitchen is infested with cockroaches, I have only intermittent hot water, and there are no smoke detectors in my apartment.

DS-MAX Tries To Shut Down Our IDT-Energy Investigation

Consumerist Undercover At IDT Energy: The Confession

Consumerist Undercover At IDT Energy: The Meltdown