This Basket Of Flowers Is Okay, But Not What I Ordered

This Basket Of Flowers Is Okay, But Not What I Ordered

Someone Cathy is close to is in the hospital with a shattered femur, which sounds extremely unpleasant. To cheer this person up, cathy sent some flowers through FTD. The flowers are pretty enough, but Cathy doesn’t think they’re what she ordered. [More]

ProFlowers Reaches Out Before I Complain About Missed Valentine’s Day Delivery

ProFlowers Reaches Out Before I Complain About Missed Valentine’s Day Delivery

We’ve criticized ProFlowers a lot over the years, even dedicating an entire post to the company’s screwups last Valentine’s Day and inflicting the classic Margaret Saga on the world. It’s only fair that we give the company credit when they do well, though, and this year they captured at least one customer’s heart by apologizing before customers spent an hour on hold or tweeted the company. [More]

We Don’t Want To Hear About Your Disappointing Flowers This Valentine’s Day

"Crap" was not an option.

Well, Consumerist readers, the time is near. There’s a month to go until Valentine’s Day, and we have a goal. We do not want to publish any disappointing wire service flower photos on Tuesday, February 18. None. Zero. Because everyone reading this right now who plans to order flowers will proceed to the friendliest, best-reviewed local florist they can find and order directly. [More]

Does The Garden Of Discontent Still Bloom In The Off-Season?

Does The Garden Of Discontent Still Bloom In The Off-Season?

Daniel ordered what’s called a “country bundle” from 1-800-Flowers for his girlfriend. When we have flowers delivered, we’re not buying dead plant stems. If that were the case, there wouldn’t be such a large industry built around flower delivery. What we’re buying is the experience of dazzling our partner when they see the flowers. Daniel’s girlfriend received this arrangement, but she wasn’t dazzled. Should she have been? [More]

This Year’s Mother’s Day Garden of Discontent Is Wonderfully Small

This Year’s Mother’s Day Garden of Discontent Is Wonderfully Small

A few weeks ago, we asked our readers not to send us any Mother’s Day floral disasters. That’s because you weren’t going to have any floral disasters. Reader R. really did her best: she located a florist near her mom’s home, placed her order directly with them, and even discussed it with the shop. She was still disappointed with the end result––though her mom probably loved it, because that’s how moms are. [More]

Watch Out For The Customer Appreciation Price Penalty At FTD

Watch Out For The Customer Appreciation Price Penalty At FTD

Longtime readers know that we recommend going directly to your favorite independent local florist, but we won’t fault Rebecca for placing an order through the national FTD site. We’re cool like that, and the flowers her friend got were probably great. We do want to share her experience, though, to point out something interesting about FTD and many other retailers. Sometimes it pays to clear your Web browser’s cookies while browsing. It “pays” in a very literal sense. [More]

We Don’t Want To Hear About Your Disappointing Flowers This Mother’s Day

We Don’t Want To Hear About Your Disappointing Flowers This Mother’s Day

There’s only a week and a half until Mother’s Day, and we have a goal. We do not want to publish any disappointing wire service flower photos on Monday, May 13. None. Because everyone reading this right now who plans to order flowers will proceed to the friendliest, best-reviewed local florist they can find and order directly. [More]

(Karen_Chappell)

FTD Salvages Fiancée’s Birthday Present After Florist Tries To Kill Her With Lilies

Sometimes, it doesn’t matter all that much when a florist substitutes in a different flower from the one you ordered, and sometimes it matters very much. In the case of Andy’s fiancée, it’s actually kind of important for her to not get a certain kind of flower, because she’s allergic to it. It’s no fun to get flowers for your birthday if you can’t be in the same room as them. [More]

This 1-800-Flowers ‘Deluxe Fruit And Gourmet Basket’ Is Some Bruised Fruit, Beef Jerky, And Cheese Nips

Looks tasty.

It’s not that David expected earth-shattering things from a 1-800-Flowers gift basket. He didn’t expect it to look exactly like the photo at left, especially since he ordered a smaller size. He was expecting something that didn’t look like your what lazy bachelor(ette) friend who can’t cook dredged up in the back of their kitchen cabinets to bring to your Super Bowl Party. [More]

FTD Thinks ‘A Different Vase Is OK’ And ‘Change The Flowers Entirely’ Mean The Same Thing

The same thing. Right?

At high-volume times like Valentine’s Day, and at any other time, really, flower-delivery services like FTD reserve the right to substitute something similar if they don’t have the exact item in stock that you want. Mark was upset shortly after Valentine’s Day because he ordered an arrangement that had a purple container, purple flowers, and some white lilies in it. Purple is her favorite color, you see, and lilies are her favorite flower. Isn’t Mark thoughtful? Speaking for the ladies of America, he is. He’s also really mad. [More]

"Crap" was not an option.

More Valentine’s Day Mishaps From Proflowers

Mykel picked out a lovely bouquet for his fiancée from Proflowers, but the lovely and lush bouquet isn’t what showed up on her desk. What she got had a lot fewer flowers than it had looked like on the site. [More]

One of these things is not like the other

The 2013 Valentine’s Day Garden Of Discontent

This year, the major national flower-distribution networks were just as busy as usual on Valentine’s Day. Busy being terrible at their jobs. Maybe the vast majority of flower arrangements ended up where they were supposed to and looked more or less correct, but it’s the outliers that make both senders and recipients feel like crap. When the vast floral-industrial complex markets to us with the message that the quality of the flowers we send or receive is a proxy for the quality of our love, then they should go out of their way not to screw that up for us. Right? [More]

1-800 Flowers is doing a lot of apologizing today.

Twitter Feeds For 1-800 Flowers, FTD Are Apologizing More Than Boyfriends Who Screwed Up Valentine’s Day

We’ve shown you some Valentine’s Day disasters from one floral delivery service, and we’re sorting through the many photos sent in by angry customers of other companies. But if you want to see just how peeved customers are, look no further than the Twitter feeds for FTD and 1-800 Flowers. [More]

Valentine’s Day Garden Of Discontent: The 2013 Entries From Proflowers

Valentine’s Day Garden Of Discontent: The 2013 Entries From Proflowers

When Proflowers isn’t accusing people of bigamy, Proflowers is apparently busy really, really disappointing girlfriends. So far today we’ve received two reports of the company dispatching really subpar roses. What the recipients actually got is nice and all, but not what the sender paid for. [More]

One of these things is greener than the other.

FTD Kicks Off The Valentine’s Day Disappointment Season With Subpar Roses On February 11th

Alex tried to beat the rush. He had a dozen roses delivered to his lady’s workplace on Monday, February 11th, paying $96 for the privilege. Whatever he expected, it was not what appears in the photo that he sent: even properly lit, there’s a lot more green and a lot less luscious red rose in that picture than there should be. [More]

(MZ)

Florist Added Pretty Purple Ribbon, Subtracted Actual Attractive Flowers

Maybe MZ should have just picked up some flowers from Walmart or the grocery store instead. FTD sent the order to a local florist, but not a competent local florist. Maybe FTD should learn to search Yelp first. [More]

FTD.com Vs. Reality: Enjoy Your Mother's Day Chargeback

FTD.com Vs. Reality: Enjoy Your Mother's Day Chargeback

It’s not a major flower-giving holiday here at The Consumerist without an installment of the Garden of Discontent. Laura (not me, a different one) sent along this disappointing diptych of the lush bouquet that she ordered for her mom from FTD.com and the meager handful of plant matter that was actually delivered, a day late. [More]

1800Flowers.com Doesn't Deliver Mom's Flowers, Conveniently Forgets To Tell You

1800Flowers.com Doesn't Deliver Mom's Flowers, Conveniently Forgets To Tell You

Here’s the thing with sending gifts, particularly gifts of flowers. You generally don’t call up the recipient ahead of time and say, “hey, expect some flowers on Saturday.” A big part of the gift is the delight and element of surprise. Aaron ordered some Mother’s Day flowers for his mom from 1800Flowers.com, and only learned that his order hadn’t showed up later in the week when he noticed she hadn’t mentioned them. Okay, they hadn’t delivered the flowers, but why didn’t they notify him, and why did they keep the money? [More]