Consumerist
shake weight
Not content with their stranglehold on the creepily suggestive fitness equipment market for women, the people behind the Shake Weight are now marketing the same product...for men.
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service plans
Does This Potty Seat Need An Extended Warranty?
Kelly just bought a plastic Baby Bjorn potty seat at Babies R Us. When the cashier rang it up, the system told her to ask Kelly if she'd like to pay another 30% of the purchase price for a service plan. More » -
Project mayhem
Fight Club Blu-ray Messes With Viewers
If you bought or rented the new Fight Club blu-ray and brought it back to the store convinced you rented a faulty disc, you've been Punk'd by director David Fincher. When the disc boots up it displays the menu for Never Been Kissed for a few seconds before showing its true Fight Club colors. More » -
sonic boom
Sonic Manager Sends Fake Gunman To Rob His Joint
A Missouri Sonic manager who could only be described as "hardcore" took employee training to Michael Scott levels by hiring a pretend robber to hold up his store and see how his employees would react, Slashfood reports: More » -
male makes it exciting
The Manliest Pants Of All Time
Yes, they're Barracuda pants—the only trousers that remind you, and anyone within eyesight, that you have a penis. More » -
don't buy a macpadd
MacPadd Inventor Drinks With Wife, Brags About Education, Curses, But Does Not Provide Tracking Number
Some people should never go the entrepreneur route. Meet David Free, the man behind QMS, a company that sells and sometimes even ships an aluminum mousepad called the MacPadd. When the guys at TomsHardware.com started asking why theirs hadn't arrived, they discovered that Free does business his own way. Or sometimes not at all:
More »Free then exclaimed, "Get out of my f***ing life!" And hung up on us. By now it was becoming clear to us that we weren't going to receive the product we paid for.
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unsubscribe
Staples Wants To Know If They're Freaking You Out With Their All-Knowing Emails
Apparently Staples is worried that their emails might be too accurate when it comes to marketing office supplies to people—accurate enough to make potential customers paranoid. More » -
higher education
Keep Track Of Which Diploma Mills Will Work Out Best For Your Pet
In this job market, anything you can do to give your cat or dog an edge is worth pursuing. That's why you shouldn't enroll your pet in just any diploma mill—you want one that's a proven scam. Boingboing points out that there's a Wikipedia page to keep track of animals with fraudulent diplomas to make it easier to comparison shop for that next fake certificate.
"List of animals with fraudulent diplomas" [Wikipedia via Boingboing] (Thanks to Trai_Dep!)
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coupon madness
Pizza Hut Coupons Let You Choose To Be An Idiot If You Want
While digging around on the Pizza Hut website's deals section, Jacob found this murderers' row of pizza coupons, which lets you get a large one-topping pizza for $9.99, $10.99 or $11.99 — your choice! He writes: More » -
we all live in a yellow boat
Company Sued For Selling Beatles MP3s Says They're Original Works, So It's Okay
Since the Beatles are notorious for refusing to release their music online, the mere fact that BlueBeat.com was selling them was kind of strange, which probably explains why EMI just sued them for copyright infringement. But BlueBeat has come up with a perfectly reasonable explanation. The songs aren't really Beatles songs, you see, but "psycho-acoustic simulations" and therefore original works. More » -
parody
DirecTV's Dead Guy Advertising Motif Taken To The Extreme
Taking the creepiness of the DirecTV Chris Farley ad and running with it, comedy site Landine TV has parodied the campaign with three ads starring Heath Ledger, JFK and Jesus. More » -
above and beyond
Hyundai Replaces Car Destroyed In BMW Parking Lot Attack
About a week ago, a woman tried to park her BMW X5 in a gym parking lot in Thornhill, Ontario. For some mysterious reason, she instead drove over two other cars and sat on top of them for a few seconds, like a big game cat savoring her kill. Then she drove off.
One of the demolished cars was a 2004 Hyundai Elantra that the owner had just finished paying off, and on Friday Hyundai gave him a new car. More »
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glitches
PayPal Asks Customer To Travel Back In Time To Make $0 Payment
Whenever a financial institution says you've owed them money for nearly 40 years, it's cause for concern. But luckily Justin, who sent us this screenshot of his PayPal line of credit account overview, has a reasonable $0 payment to make. More » -
amazon payphrase
Amazon.com Thinks Reader's Balls Are Splendid
Amazon's new PayPhrase service has its advantages and disadvantages, but one curious feature is that the system generates sample phrases for you. Usually these are pretty innocuous and uplifting—"Laura's Amazing Effort" and the like. But not for Gil. The PayPhrase system took the opportunity to comment on his private parts, and generated the phrase "Gil's Splendid Balls" for him. More » -
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wipeouts
Charmin Rep Shows You How To Wipe (Video)
In this video spotted by the New York Times, a helpful Charmin rep demonstrates a heretofore unknown ability of Charmin Freshmates to wipe toothpaste off the human hand. More » -
funny
HSN Breaks TV, Showing Need To Firmly Attach Your Wii Accessories
This HSN presenter remembered to use his wrist strap when playing with a Wiimote, so good for him! Unfortunately, it turns out you also have to make sure any attachments are firmly attached. More » -
madness
Monster Energy Threatens Actual Movie Monster (We're Not Kidding)
We're back to thinking Hansen Beverage Company is being taken for a ride by its legal counsel, Continental Enterprises, with this latest chapter in their trademark bullying saga. An actor named Trygve Lode has been contacted by Continental Enterprises on behalf of Hansen and told to remove all advertising and sales of Monster Energy from his site. The only reference to Monster Energy is the photo above. More »
