UPDATE: Tenant's Surprise Nudist Colony Will Now Be Limited To Pool, Tenant Still Can't Break Lease

UPDATE: Tenant's Surprise Nudist Colony Will Now Be Limited To Pool, Tenant Still Can't Break Lease

Last week, we wrote about Sam’s surprising discovery that his apartment complex was to be converted into a “European style” nudieland. The apartment complex apparently hadn’t notified its tenants, and Sam learned about it from a newspaper. Last weekend, Sam wrote in with an update.

"So Apparently They Decided To Turn Our Apartment Complex Into A Nudist Colony"

"So Apparently They Decided To Turn Our Apartment Complex Into A Nudist Colony"

Reader Sam writes in to let us know that his apartment complex is being converted into a “clothing optional” paradise. Tenants of The Arbors at Branch Creek, you are now the hedonistic residents of Eden!

Geek Squad Hatched Plot To Harvest Porn From Pornstar Jasmine Grey's HardDrive, Days Before She Died In Car Crash

“I worked for Best Buy 285 several years ago (2003-2005) and was both a Blackshirt and an Agent once the Geek Squad rolled out.

T-Mobile Sells New Phone Loaded With Porn

T-Mobile Sells New Phone Loaded With Porn

Taking a page from Comcast, T-Mobile sold Shelby Hinds a phone containing 60 images from an online porn gallery associated with another user’s account. Shelby purchased the phone from a T-Mobile kiosk at Walmart, where she “watched the salesman take the wrapping off two new phones and program them. ” T-Mobile said the porn was Shelby’s fault:

…the representative on the phone told her the only way the phone could have those images was if she took the photos herself or if the pictures were sent to her in a text message.

Shelby brought the smut phone to a T-Mobile store, where the employees said they had “never seen a problem like this before.” T-Mobile is now attributing the porn to a “technical glitch,” and will replace the phone free of charge and waive Shelby’s activation fees. — CAREY GREENBERG-BERGER

Lara Is Not A Porn Star

Lara Is Not A Porn Star

When Lara placed a self-portrait taken at age fourteen on deviantART, she never expected it to be stolen by TVX Films and placed on the cover of the DVD porno “Body Magic.” Lara asked the President of TVX Films to remove her photo and compensate her for the theft. He responded with the following email:

I’M SURE BY THE END OF THE MONTH YOUR FACE WILL BE HISTORY. WE HAVE STOPPED SELLING THE DVD UNTIL COVER IS REPLACED. WE HAVE FURTHER CHECKED OUT YOUR NAME AND ITS NOT LIKE IT’S A HOUSE WHOLE NAME. ACTUALLY, REMOVING YOUR IMAGE WILL HELP IMPROVE THE SELL OF THE DVD….. SO FAR IT BOMBED.

Cool Whip Is Lube

Cool Whip Is Lube

Polysorbates are made by polymerizing ethylene oxide (a precursor to antifreeze) with a sugar alcohol derivative. The result can be a detergent, an emulsifier, or, in the case of polysorbate 60, a major ingredient in some sexual lubricants.

Shame we never got to hear Charlton Heston exclaim: “Cool Whip is Lube!” — CAREY GREENBERG-BERGER

Walmart and Target Sell Anime Porn

Walmart and Target Sell Anime Porn

UPDATE: Walmart Apologizes

Walmart Sells Gay Porn Filled Zune To Little Girl

Walmart Sells Gay Porn Filled Zune To Little Girl

Chanell Martin bought her 12-year old daughter a Zune from Walmart, pre-loaded with gay porn.

Fleshbot’s Guide to Valentine’s Sexy Gift Guides

Fleshbot’s Guide to Valentine’s Sexy Gift Guides

Our sexy sister site Fleshbot—yes, she’s easy; no, we don’t mind—has put together their ‘Horny Valentine’s Gift Guide Guide.’ In case you need help dissecting the title, please let us assist you before you click the link.