([F]oxymoron)

A Guide To Figuring Out Executives’ E-Mail Addresses

So you’ve exhausted all the standard customer service and complaint-resolution routes and decided it’s time to unleash your issue via an Executive E-mail Carpet Bomb. Only problem is, you can’t find any contact info for these executives. What to do? [More]

EECB To Sony Turns Lemon Laptop Into New Laptop

EECB To Sony Turns Lemon Laptop Into New Laptop

Aaron’s Sony VAIO has failed a few times too many. He faithfully sent it back for repair or had a technician visit his home four times, believing Sony’s promise that the repairs would fix the issue. The last time, it failed during finals week at his college on the East Coast. Sony’s repair depot kept the machine for a month, yet the issue still wasn’t fixed for good. The laptop is now out of warranty, but Aaron had the law on his side. He launched an executive e-mail carpet bomb to some Sony contacts, copying Consumerist. The next day, he heard back from two different people at Sony, offering him a new machine comparable to the one that had failed him. [More]

Email To IKEA Results In Free Delivery Of Functioning Closet Doors

Email To IKEA Results In Free Delivery Of Functioning Closet Doors

The ever-popular EECB (Executive Email Carpet Bomb) scored another direct hit with reader “Generic_Username.” He and his wife bought some closet doors from IKEA, but didn’t install them until some renovations were complete. When it turned out the doors were defective, G.U. and his wife were told they’d have to pay to have new doors shipped to their house. Ugh! [More]

E.E.C.B. Forces Best Buy To Finally Replace Defective TV

E.E.C.B. Forces Best Buy To Finally Replace Defective TV

It took an Executive Email Carpet Bomb to convince Best Buy to replace Bryan’s Panasonic LiFi LCD Projection TV after it ate through four lamps. Bryan had purchased Best Buy’s extended warranty, which contains a no lemon clause that promises a replacement after three failed repairs. Best Buy conveniently insisted that replacing the broken lamp did not count as a “qualified repair.” Bryan first escalated his complaint through normal channels; when he had no other choice, he launched the mighty EECB.

Bank Of America Refunds $315 In Overdraft Fees Thanks To EECB

Bank Of America Refunds $315 In Overdraft Fees Thanks To EECB

Ryan convinced Bank of America to drop their demand for $315 from nine overdraft fees by sending a well-crafted Executive Email Carpet Bomb. Ryan admitted that he was wrong to expect his checks to clear so quickly, but gently reminded the bank that nine overdraft fees was excessive, and explained that he would consider taking his business elsewhere if they thought this was an acceptable way to treat a long-time customer. Two days later, the fees were gone.

No, You Should Not Launch An E.E.C.B. Against Your Own Employer

No, You Should Not Launch An E.E.C.B. Against Your Own Employer

Do not launch an Executive Email Carpet Bomb against your own company or it will explode in your face. Reader E discovered this the hard way when he tried to use an E.E.C.B. to convince the bank where he worked to reverse $300 worth of overdraft fees.

EECB Scores Direct Hit On Duke Energy

EECB Scores Direct Hit On Duke Energy

Josh chopped down Duke Energy‘s thicket of phone trees by launching the mighty Executive Email Carpet Bomb. He had a simple request: turn on the power to his construction site. Calling the main customer support number led to a series of thirty-minute waits while listening to Duke’s cheerful computer voice promise that he would hold “for no longer than one minute.” He also sent six emails to Duke’s customer service inbox, all of which were ignored. Finally, after three weeks without power, Josh tracked down executive contact info for Duke’s executives and fired off an EECB. Five minutes later, his problem was solved.

Enterprise EECB Saves Man From Unjustly Paying $560 For Bumper Scratch

Enterprise EECB Saves Man From Unjustly Paying $560 For Bumper Scratch

Enterprise Car Rental charged Mike $560 for a scratch on the bumper he felt was unfair, but after he followed The Consumerist’s instructions on sending an Executive Email Carpet Bomb (EECB), all that changed. “Long story short,” he writes, “Within ONE DAY, that email was forward with highlights , such as URGENT -PLEASE RESOLVE, and ultimately reached the northeast manager, who called me and apologized profusely for their poor handling of the situation, and WAIVED ALL charges ($560 for repairs). done..all wiped… GONE!!! THANK you for publishing that thread.. it absolutely positively works!!!”

Office Max Apologizes, Actually Apologizes, For Snooty Manager

Office Max Apologizes, Actually Apologizes, For Snooty Manager

The condescending store-manager, irked that your request for them to fulfill their contractual agreement has forced them away from a high-scoring session of Snood. Long have consumers suffered under his reign of caprice and indifference. No longer. A weakness has been discovered. The EECB, a modern version of “taking it to the top.” Jim used it and got not only the rare and magnificent personal apology, but a $30 gift card and he was allowed to make the return he wanted to do in the first place. His story follows.

13 Email Addresses For An Office Max EECB

13 Email Addresses For An Office Max EECB

In case your efforts to deal with Office Max customer service fail, and you’ve escalated to a supervisor, here are 13 working email addresses you can use to send off an EECB.

Andrew's Epic Comcast Debacle

Andrew's Epic Comcast Debacle

UPDATE: After he sent an EECB, all of Andrew’s billing errors have been resolved.

This Repaired Acer Laptop Needs More Screen Smudge

This Repaired Acer Laptop Needs More Screen Smudge

Joelle expected Acer to repair her chronically overheating laptop, not coat the inside of its screen with “a sort of brown dripping.” Acer insists that their shipping company caused the internal screen damage, and won’t repair the laptop unless Joelle pays up.

Warn Comcast You're Moving, Lose Your Internet Access

Warn Comcast You're Moving, Lose Your Internet Access

Chris gave Comcast a heads up that he was moving and wanted to arrange a transfer date ahead of time, and they disconnected his present internet access instead. Gahhhhhhh! Ahhhh!!! When he made various calls to various Comcast departments, various employees agreed it was messed up, but all refused to actually solve the problem. So Chris, using some email addresses we posted, sent out a well-crafted executive email carpet bomb…

Home Depot's Extraordinary Service Leads To Free $800 Appliance Upgrade

Home Depot's Extraordinary Service Leads To Free $800 Appliance Upgrade

Michael launched an Executive Email Carpet Bomb after Home Depot twice failed to deliver an undamaged washer and dryer. Home Depot’s CEO Frank Blake quickly thanked Michael for his even-handed letter, and promised that the local store manager would make him a happy customer…

Thanks, Northwest, For Flying Me To Chicago Because I Asked Nicely!

Thanks, Northwest, For Flying Me To Chicago Because I Asked Nicely!

Contrary to published rumors, I did not spend last weekend trafficking Canadian drugs or performing “community service.” No, I enjoyed a gluttonous weekend in Chicago thanks to Northwest’s generosity. In the age or rising fees, reduced frequent flier miles, and general travel hell, it’s still possible to extract favors from airlines, if you know which levers to push…

FTD.com Delivers The Bill, Forgets The Flowers

FTD.com Delivers The Bill, Forgets The Flowers

FTD.com forgot to deliver flowers to Tip’s girlfriend on Valentine’s Day, but that didn’t stop them from delivering the bill. When calls to FTD.com didn’t go through, Tip launched the fearsome Executive Email Carpet Bomb. He wrote:

Perhaps $75 is not a lot to you. Perhaps the happiness of your customers does not mean a lot to you either. Perhaps, for a company that’s been around for nearly 100 years, you simply forgot to mark your calendar that yesterday was Valentine’s Day.

Launch A Virgin Atlantic EECB

Launch A Virgin Atlantic EECB

Here are email addresses you can use to launch an executive email carpet bomb against Virgin Atlantic Airlines. Good for when you’ve made multiple attempts to resolve an issue with regular customer service but for some reason they just can’t get it right.

Email Addresses For 19 Dell Executives

Email Addresses For 19 Dell Executives

Computer on fire? Video card ruined? Don’t let Dell’s Indian CSRs tell you it’s your fault. When escalating fails and all normal channels of recourse are exhausted, send an email to Dell’s top executives. After the jump, 19 email addresses for Dell executives that you can use to launch the mighty and feared Executive Email Carpet Bomb.

  • Michael Dell
    Chairman and CEO
    michael_dell@dell.com
  • Donald Carty
    Vice Chairman and CFO
    donald_carty@dell.com
  • [More]