Shrimp Shoplifter Stuffs Shellfish Down Pants, Up Shirt

Shrimp Shoplifter Stuffs Shellfish Down Pants, Up Shirt

We always like to keep an eye on the latest incidents where shoplifters are caught in the act of stuffing meat down their pants. The usual choices of criminals against meat, steak and lobster make sense: they’re pricey, for people who want to resell the meats, and they’re tasty high-status foods, for those who would prefer to eat them. It’s been a while, though, since we’ve heard of anyone stuffing shrimp down their pants, which happened recently in Connecticut. [More]

Man Accused Of Stuffing $80 Worth Of Steak Down His Pants

Man Accused Of Stuffing $80 Worth Of Steak Down His Pants

People love steak. We love steak so much that people who want to eat steak but can’t afford it will steal, it, and do so by stuffing it down their pants. Why pants? Why steak? We can answer the second half of that question, at least. [More]

West Virginia Supermarkets Dealing With Spike In Meat Thefts

West Virginia Supermarkets Dealing With Spike In Meat Thefts

Here at Consumerist, we have a slight obsession with stories in the news about people attempting to steal meat by shoving it down their pants, a crime that is simultaneously sad and hilarious. Now there’s a report out of Charleston, West Virginia that the city is experiencing a meat-theft epidemic, with supermarket employees patrolling the shelves. [More]

(Ernesto Andrade)

Here’s another story from the meat-down-pants beat: last week, a man was caught at a Wisconsin co-op grocery store with a pork tenderloin and two sandwiches stuffed down his pants. He told police that he shoplifted the items because he was homeless and hungry. He received a citation for retail theft and, one hopes, a referral to a place that could provide him with something to eat. [La Crosse Tribune]

The suspects' likely plan for later in the day. (ken fager)

Shoplifters Spotted Shoving Hamburgers Down Pants

Two men in Texas California were sort of shuffling around a supermarket without purchasing anything. One of the men was wearing very baggy pants, and store employees later told police that it was obvious something had been shoved inside his trousers. When the staff confronted him, his pants fell down, revealing ill-gotten hamburgers. [More]


Shoplifter Arrested After Shoving Steak Down His Pants

A 53-year-old man in Arkansas was arrested last week for shoplifting. His crime was one that has long fascinated us here at Consumerist: he is accused of trying to steal steaks from a Food Giant grocery store by shoving them down his pants. While this might seem like a logical and delicious enough crime, it’s also kind of a noticeable one. Also, no one will want to eat the meat. [More]


Walmart Shopper Thinks No One Will Notice 6.5 Pounds Of Cow Tongue Shoved In His Pants

We understand that the very act of wearing pants is kind of like adorning your legs in potential pockets — as long as nothing falls out the bottom, you’ve got fabric fit for carrying stuff. But just because you’ve got room in your pants to spare doesn’t mean it’s okay to shove stolen meat (or seafood) down there, as yet another bad consumer has shown us this week. [More]


Man Jailed For Rubbing Pepperoni On His Weiner At Grocery Store

Earlier this week, a northern New York man was caught doing a terrible, terrible thing to an innocent stick of pepperoni. He was arrested and put behind bars…not just for lewd behavior in public in a Hannaford store, but because they had to destroy the pepperoni he had defiled afterward. [More]