Ok, But When Frankeberry Mooches Money And Steals Your Girlfriend, You Know This Whole Brands As Personalities Thing Has Gone Too Far

Marketers are douchebags and they’re here for breakfast. Copyranter points us to some insipid questions from the confidential online Honey Bunches of Oats survey.

All-State Ad Irks

All-State Ad Irks

This is from a full-page ad in Tuesday’s Wall Street Journal, pointed to us by the inimitable Copyranter. The headline above it reads, “If San Francisco had the same size quake as in 1906, it could cost $400 billion to rebuild.

Big Watch Mocked

Big Watch Mocked

This gaudy watch struck Copyranter ‘s eye. After he got the blood out, he wrote:

Continental’s Tagline Enrages Man, to Comedic Effect

Continental’s Tagline Enrages Man, to Comedic Effect

Continental’s tagline always reminds us off that old jazz standard about heroin addiction, “Straighten Up and Fly Right.”

Gilette
s Fusion Razor Review With Built-In Laser-Ion Cannon

Gilette s Fusion Razor Review With Built-In Laser-Ion Cannon

Copyranter, a disaffected but unbowed copywriter, has a “nice,” i.e. fanged, review of Gilette’s new Fusion razor, which, in keeping with predictions by The Onion and Mad Magazine, features five blades, 10 microfins, a trimmer, a face-goo strip and an intergalactic sub-atomic ray gun.