(net_efekt)

Welsh Pub Fined For Discrimination After Job Ad Says “Being British” Could Help You Get Hired

It doesn’t matter if you’re just trying to inject some cheeky humor into a want ad, the Human Rights Commission takes discrimination very seriously. New York City’s only Welsh pub found that out the hard way, after posting an ad on Craigslist last year looking for bartenders and noting, “Being British definitely works in your favor.” [More]

Sprint Isn’t Sure Whether They Can Unlock My iPhone Or Not

Sprint Isn’t Sure Whether They Can Unlock My iPhone Or Not

In a few months, Jessica and her fiancé will move to his native London. This wasn’t in her long-term plans when she bought an iPhone 4S and signed a contract with Sprint. Life happens. At least she will be able to keep her newish iPhone after unlocking it and swapping in a UK SIM card…right? Well, no. Maybe. No. Yes, but for $300. Nobody, including Sprint employees, seems to know what Sprint’s actual policy is. [More]

Would You Like Some Gold-Infused Cheese?

Would You Like Some Gold-Infused Cheese?

Fancy artisanal cheeses are all very well and good, but what if you want your dairy products to sparkle? If you enjoy sparkly foods and flaunting your wealth, perhaps Clawson Stilton Gold is for you. The cheese costs £60 per 100-gram slice, or around $95 for about 3.5 ounces. It’s a white Stilton cheese with generous helpings of gold-cinnamon schnapps and edible gold leaf. [More]

Schwarzenegger Asked To Close Prostitution Ratings Website

Schwarzenegger Asked To Close Prostitution Ratings Website

At Punternet.com you can rate UK prostitutes, find out about British massage parlors, and participate in a bulletin board about all things prostitutey. (“Punter” = “john” in British slang.) Yesterday a British government minister asked Arnold Schwarzenegger to shut it down, because although it concerns the British sex industry—where prostitution isn’t illegal—it’s based in California.

British Theme Park Attempts To Ban B.O.

British Theme Park Attempts To Ban B.O.

You know how when you go to an amusement park and ride roller coasters, you raise your arms in the air and scream like a bloody fool? Well, a theme park in Britain wants to ban that. Not the roller coasters or the screaming, just the raising of arms.

Consumers No Longer Forking Out For Knives

Consumers No Longer Forking Out For Knives

Culturally bankrupt shoppers are now buying twice as many forks as knives, according to a British department store. The Brits blame the erosion of their cherished culture on “the American habit of using a single fork.” And that’s not all. Apparently we’re also ruining their understanding and respect for the elegant tradition of proper place settings.

Impoverished Consumers Overwhelm British Site That Sells Expired Food

Impoverished Consumers Overwhelm British Site That Sells Expired Food

Impoverished and hungry Britons can’t get enough of Approved Food, a site that sells expired but still edible food for up to half off. Even after shutting down for two days to grapple with a ten-fold rise in traffic, the site warns that they still have to process 12 days worth of backorders. But can’t expired food give you salmonella or herpes, you ask? Nope! FDA regulations don’t require most foods to carry expiration dates, and selling expired food isn’t a violation of federal law.

Woman Barricades Repairman Until He Fixes Her Washer

Woman Barricades Repairman Until He Fixes Her Washer

A British woman locked a repairman in her washer room and said she wouldn’t let him out until he fixed her washer.

Chevron Depot Blows Up Man's House, He Gets Nothing

Chevron Depot Blows Up Man's House, He Gets Nothing

3 years ago, an oil depot owned by Chevron and Total exploded, ruining Ian Silverstein’s house and destroying everything inside. It was Britain’s largest peacetime explosion and he’s lucky to be alive. To date, he has not received a dime in compensation. So he can get his story out there and put pressure on the unresponsive oil companies, a documentary about his story is set to launch December 11, 2008.

Grocery Shrink Ray Hits UK

Grocery Shrink Ray Hits UK

The Grocery Shrink Ray has expanded its range and is no longer just hitting the US. Pint-sized woe has befallen the the UK snack section. For one, the Dairylea triangle is shrinking from 180 to 160g per cheese wheel. Other shrunken products include Rolo, Palmolive, Olvatine, Dairy Milk, Mars bars, Yorkie chocolate bars, and Pringles.Check out the company double-talk as they tried to explain away the changes, sometimes with verbal softshoe, others with oddly pugilistic rebuttals:

Procter & Gamble: Pringles Are Not Potato Chips

Procter & Gamble: Pringles Are Not Potato Chips

Seeking to evade a 17.5% sales tax, lawyers for Procter & Gamble successfully argued that Pringles aren’t actually potato chips. Even though all Pringles containers are clearly marked “Potato Crisps,” Procter & Gamble’s lawyers argued that “Pringles don’t look like a chip, don’t feel like a chip, and don’t taste like a chip.”

Put Down the Bag of Chips, and Drink From the Bottle of Oil

Put Down the Bag of Chips, and Drink From the Bottle of Oil

We’re not sure what’s more horrifying: The fact that half of British schoolchildren eat a pack of potato chips (or crisps, if you prefer) every single day, or the fact that such a rate of chip consumption means you’re ingesting more than a gallon of vegetable oil every year.

KFC Takeaway Added to UK Miranda Rights

KFC Takeaway Added to UK Miranda Rights

As an Irishman, I am for all intents and purposes British. I eat crisps, not chips. I dress head-to-toe in vinyl Adidas tracksuits with my bangs greased in a straight line down my forehead. I refer to people I don’t like as “muppets” and “knackers.” My teeth are jagged brown daggers that stick out of my face at implausible angles. But even I have no idea what a ‘YOB’ is.

Ice Cream Man Convicted for Pirating Videogames

Ice Cream Man Convicted for Pirating Videogames

100,000 or $174,345.29 in unilateral decision making money.