Pike Place Roast Coffee:

Chris: "I like the old "burnt" coffee just fine."

Ben: "This tastes like 'coffee.' Like 'acme brand coffee.'" Meg: "Like from Looney Toons?" Ben: "Yes, exactly."

Carey: "Easily overwhelmed by the milk."

Meg: "If you told me this was Dunkin' Donuts coffee I wouldn't punch you in the face and call you a liar."

Apple Bran Muffin:

The Apple Bran Muffin has 330 calories and costs $1.75

Ben: "This muffin is the sh*t. It has a lot of sugar, though."

Carey: "It tastes like Frosted Flakes in muffin form. It's Grrrrrrrrreat."

Meg: "I can get behind this muffin." Chris: "Don't you pretty much just love muffins, though?" Meg: "Ok, well. Yes. Shut up."

Perfect Oatmeal:

Perfect Oatmeal has 140-390 calories depending on the toppings you choose. It costs $2.45.

Chris: "I just don't get it. It's nothing you wouldn't do at home with instant oatmeal. There's no Starbucks touch to it. People who eat oatmeal eat it at home or microwave it at work. It tasted fine, but I don't get it."

Carey: "I'm offended by the term 'perfect oatmeal.' It wasn't perfect. It was all right. And it costs $2.45."

Meg: "The nuts are good. I don't know about $2.45 good, but good."

Ben: "Once you add the nuts, there's something to talk about."

Captain Duvel Moneycat:"NOM NOM NOM NOM GET OUT OF THE WAY NOM MOVE OVER NOM"

Power Protein Plate:

The Power Protein Plate has 330 calories and costs $4.95. It contains a hard-boiled egg, peanut butter, a small bagel, grapes, apples and cheese.

Chris: "This is a good package, but I don't like hard boiled eggs."

Ben: "Good portion size. I like it."

Carey: "This is an airplane breakfast."

Meg: "I would buy this at the airport and take it on United Airlines because it doesn't cost 9 %#%@-ing dollars."

Which of these options, if any, would you personally buy? Any final thoughts?

Chris: "I have already bought the "Stella" (280 calories, $1.75) and will again. It's a "not unhealthy" choice. I'm impressed with the changes Starbucks has made overall. It's true that the breakfast sandwiches stink up the place. It was not a good smell. Regularly brewing the coffee makes a difference as well."

Ben: "I'd have to have a reason to eat at Starbucks, but if I did, I'd get the protein pack. That's your 4 food groups right there, and its a sensible portion. It's convenient. And there's pepper. For the egg. They even peel it for you. That's great."

Carey: "If Starbucks showed up every morning with a breakfast like this, there are some days when I would open the door."

Meg: "The oatmeal was a little pricey for what it was, but it did taste good, especially once you added the nuts. I would eat that muffin again. Damn, I love muffins."

Captain Duvel Moneycat: "I love this oatmeal more than anything I have ever known. It has opened my eyes and given my life purpose. Never again will I take for granted the miracle of God's finest creation — the oat. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to lick the floor where someone accidentally dropped some."

Alex writes:

This morning, my girlfriend made a quick run through her local Marysville, CA, McDonald's drive-thru to get a McGriddle Happy Meal for her three-year old. When pulling away from the restaurant, she heard a cry from the back seat. Her son's McGriddle, it appeared, was missing its sausage patty. Annoyed that yet another drive-thru order was bungled, she went into the restaurant to retrieve the missing meat. When she told the manager of the meat-less McGriddle, the manager replied that the McGriddles in the Happy Meals do not come with sausage, just two syrupy buns wrapped in paper. Seriously. Despite charging regular McGriddle prices, their kids' McGriddles arrive sans meat. SANS MEAT! So, my gf complained obviously, but this manager wouldn't budge, not even for the sake of the most base customer service, not even in the face of common sense, not even with a wailing three-year old in her store. She flat-out refused to hand over a a slice of meat that probably cost McD's pennies to pump out of their patty making plant.

I get that shoddy service at mammoth chains like McDs is pretty much the norm, but I'm absolutely perplexed as to why this store would turn logic on its head by packing two buns into a wrapper and call it a McGriddle, then refuse a customer's reasonable request for a tiny slab of cheap-ass meat.

We looked at McDonald's website to try to find a meatless McGriddle meal — but couldn't find nutritional information for such a thing. We asked Alex for some more info:

I believe the McGriddle Happy Meals are only available at certain locations. For example, the closest McDonald's to me in Rancho Cucamonga, CA, has had the meals since the McGriddles were introduced in 2003. (Comes with the usual: choice of drink, toy, hashbrowns, and sausage-enhanced sandwich.) However, the Gorman, CA, McDonald's doesn't carry them at all.

The Marysville location does indeed carry the item on their menu. On the drive-thru menu, it notes the meal comes with "two griddle cakes," but I can't imagine anyone assuming that the sandwich they were purchasing for their kids would solely consist of two syrup-drenched "cakes" without a slice of meat. It's tons misleading, and mind-bogglingly stupid to even make this a Happy Meal-exclusive menu item [and while the sausage McGriddles are a quick find on mcdonalds.com, the nutritional info. for these "cakes" only appears as part of the sausage mcgriddle sandwich. Here's the description from the site: "McGriddles® breakfast sandwiches provide an innovative way for customers to eat warm golden griddle cakes (with the sweet taste of maple syrup baked right in), and different combinations of savory sausage, crispy bacon, fluffy eggs and melted cheese in a convenient sandwich."]

Seriously, who orders a McGriddle without expecting meat?

Yeah, why wouldn't you just order Hotcakes?

From the Chicago Tribune:

McDonald's Southern-style items are simple affairs. The sandwich, which has a suggested retail price of $2.89, comes on plain steamed bun, with butter and two pickles its sole condiments. The biscuit, which goes for $1.89, comes adorned only with butter.

Both arrived in stores nationwide within the past two weeks, and a national ad campaign began last week. On Thursday, customers who buy any medium or large drink at McDonald's 14,000 U.S. restaurants can receive a free Southern-style sandwich or breakfast biscuit.

In the South, chicken for breakfast has long been popular, as have simple-but-hearty fried chicken sandwiches like Chick-fil-A's, said West of Stifel Nicolaus. "People in the South love this stuff. The wild card is, will this do as well in the North, in Chicago or Michigan?"

McDonald's says it has extensively tested its Southern-style items in the North, as well as the South, and that both went over well. For those who think chicken for breakfast might sound bizarre, McDonald's Thoma pointed to the McGriddle.

Launched in 2003, the McGriddle—eggs and/or meat sandwiched between two pancakes—was seen by some as bizarre, he said. But it became a big hit and a staple of McDonald's breakfast menu.

"People are venturing outside of their comfort zones," Thoma said.

What say you, Northerners? Are you going to eat a chicken biscuit for breakfast?

No Beef With Chicken Sales [Chicago Tribune]

Rachael writes:

Long story short, McDonalds is the only place near to my home or office that's convenient to grab a quick bite or drink. Not good... but convenient.

I tend to pop in in the mornings for a small breakfast and always order a large coke since it's really the only time during the day that I will be out... and it will last until it's time for me to go home so again, convenient...

Anyway, I always order a large coke... Always get a large coke.

Today, I order a breakfast meal with a large coke. They give me a medium cup. I look at my receipt. It clearly says "large coke 1.59", which is the price of the large. I think the medium is $1.35.

I tell her I ordered a large and she says no, that's the "breakfast large - at breakfast, a large is a medium, a medium is a small and a small is a child's cup"

Now, I used to work at McDonalds in the not so recent past... But recent enough to know how this works. When you order orange juice, that applies. A large orange juice is served in a medium cup. It's the way they have always (at least around here) sized their orange juice. If you order a large soda, you get an actual large. I think the thinking is that orange juice is more expensive so they're basically charging more for it.

But now, all of a sudden, if I order a large soda and pay at the large soda price, I get a medium - simply because of the time of day??? I'm in a really shitty mood anyway this morning and the manager wasn't available and I really didn't feel like arguing with her and being in an even worse mood for a stupid soda... But dammit - everybody's feeling the credit crunch and there they all go basically reaching into my pockets to pad their profits...

ARGH. Could the extra $0.24 mean so much to them? The kicker is.... you know how the movie "supersize Me" made McDonalds discontinue the supersize line? Well.... wanting a large soda (and I mean a real large, not medium - breakfast large), I asked for a supersize soda. Thinking they would downsize it to the real large that I wanted. Nope. I was told they no longer offer supersize. No shit, I just wanted a large soda.

It shouldn't be so hard to get a large soda at breakfast time....

Is McDonald's pinching pennies or was the the work of one rogue agent?

Through our extensive research and development, we believe we have hit the mark with the protein and fruit-blended beverage we have developed, which is made from simple ingredients that provide the benefit of sustained energy that our customers want.

This new beverage will initially be available in two flavors and will include fresh fruit and a proprietary whey protein, with no artificial sweeteners, delivering 15 or more grams of protein with no more than 270 calories.

On a recent trip to Italy, we found a unique beverage platform that we believe to be a perfect complement to our overall beverage business. This exclusive, proprietary opportunity was developed through a partnership with our Italian supplier and represents a brand new category of beverage, which is both refreshing, low calorie, and indulgent at the same time. It offers a unique frozen, smooth texture, distinctive taste profiles and options ranging from fruit-based to dairy-based to yogurt-based ingredients...

And we believe customer acceptance of this new distinctive beverage category will create a new demand, drive incremental traffic to our stores much like Frappuccino did 10 years ago.

So even if Starbucks rolled out literally the best smoothies available in America, wiping Jamba Juice off the face of the earth and converting every last one of their customers, that would still increase revenue by just 11 percent. And the reality, of course, will be far more modest.

Not only is the impact of the new beverages likely to be minimal, but they also seem at odds with C.E.O. Howard Schultz's stated intention to bring the focus at Starbucks back to coffee.

The labor intensity of making the drinks, the added blender noise, and the new task of sourcing fruit all add up to distractions from that core concern.

No Smoothie Sailing For Starbucks [Portfolio]
Starbucks F2Q08 (Qtr End 3/30/08) Earnings Call Transcript [Seeking Alpha]
(Photo: artnchicken )

Here's how Sabrina tells the story:

So there I was....eating a bowl of Cranberry Granola cereal a couple nights ago when I chomp down on a hard mass. The cereal is rather chunky and nutty, like most granola is, so i figured it was just a shell of a nut that snuck in there....WRONG!!

I proceeded to pull it out of my mouth only to find something that resembled a bone of sorts. I turned it over and discovered it had TEETH! A lot of them. Too small big to be mouse teeth. I am thinking rat, chipmunk or squirrel!

I started dry heaving immediately! I can't believe this was happening. I think I am still in shock! Thank goodness I didn't crack my back molar. I did cut a portion of my gum line...but nothing major. My jaw hurt for the rest of the night....and my stomach turned for the rest of the night and into the next day.

I cannot believe I was biting down on the head/jaw bone and teeth of a nasty rodent!
What do you do in a situation like this! I was not hurt...so I am not sure I even have a case. This is just so awful though! I am nauseous just thinking about it!

The company is "Bakery on Main" natural gourment. The cereal was nutty cranberry maple granola. This is an organic company out of connecticut.

Yesterday I brought the the bone and packaging to Hannaford ( the grocery store where i bought it). I was very polite and explained to them what happened. I didnt want to give the bone to anyone just yet...but they said as part of their "process" they needed the package and bone to seal up and send to headquarters. I was uneasy about it at first...but realized that everything was going to be properly documented. She doubled my money back.

When i got home...I called "Bakery on Main" and spoke to them. They were very apologetic and offered me TONS of free cereal products...BUT....I declined. I think I will be very weary about eating cereal for quite a while and the thought of eating any at this point makes me nauseous. He then offered me a hannaford gift card. I said that was kind of him...and whatever he felt he should do is fine. I was very polite with him...it wasn't his fault what happened. He said the farmers he gets grains from is what was most likely the issue. The scanning systems pick up metal and such, and bone is harder to find I guess. I told him I am fine aside from a cut on my gum line. Either way this is terribly disturbing. I chewed on remains of a rodent head!!! I told him that Hannaford will be contacting him as well. I asked if he wanted to see pictures..and emailed them to him.

So that is the action I have taken. I am still in shock by what i found. It is too bad...I really liked their products!

RELATED: Dancing Deer And The Metal Spear

CEO Howard Shultz also announced that breakfast sandwiches were on the way out. From Starbucks Gossip:

** The warm sandwiches "are going to be out by year's end." In the meantime, they will be "de-emphasized."

** Serving sandwiches got in the way of employees' "ability to make the perfect shot of espresso." In other words, spending time on sandwiches took away from the focus on coffee.

** The sandwiches will be replaced with "a breakfast menu that delivers what our customers are asking for."

Starbucks to get rid of warm breakfast sandwiches [Starbucks Gossip]
(Photo:cleverclaire)

Could it be true? It is, here's photographic evidence. We don't know about you people, but Wendy's breakfast sounds kinda good to us. Anyone tried it?

Wendy's joins scramble to lure morning diners [Daily Southtown]
(Photo: Growl Roar)

Excited? It's only available in certain test markets for now, but if the people in Omaha, NE like it... Taco Bell Breakfast could be coming to you. Didn't they already try this, only to fail miserably?

If anyone actually tries anything off the menu, send photos of the food to our Flickr pool. We're curious. —MEGHANN MARCO

Omaha Gets To Try Taco Bell's Breakfasts [KETV]
(Photo: nevrlndtink)

Animal rights advocates praised Burger King for its new commitment to begin buying eggs and pork from suppliers that do not keep their animals in cages or crates.

''We certainly hope that people will order the BK Veggie Burger when they go into Burger King,'' said Matt Prescott, spokesman for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. ''But the fact that Burger King has made positive changes for some of the animals killed for its restaurants will send a ripple effect through the fast food industry and show other companies that animal welfare cannot be ignored.''

PETA has been critical of the fast food giant in the past

Burger King Pledges Cage - Free Food [NYT]
(Photot: MortonFox)

The company is asking franchisees to spend about $10,000 to reconfigure their kitchens and install new equipment, such as holding cabinets for McGriddles and hotcakes, to shave precious seconds off breakfast assembly time.
That request makes sense given the heightened competition, but some franchisees see an unspoken motive behind the program. Their suspicions arise from remarks McDonald's CEO James Skinner made in September, when he told investors that all-day breakfast could be possible with a new cooking system under development in the company's innovation center in Romeoville. After his comments, McDonald's representatives quickly told the press that Mr. Skinner was merely "painting a picture of what is possible" and that all-day breakfast might never happen.

But now, some operators believe it could. "You put two and two together and it looks like this could be a step toward accomplishing breakfast all day," says a franchisee in the Southwest who spoke on condition of anonymity.

McD's franchisees foresee all-day breakfast [Crain's Chicago Business]
(Photo:The Consumerist)

Burger King Adding Breakfast Menu Items [Forbes]

Ever notice how they don't make ads with cute characters frolicking through the jungle, screaming, "Hey! Who stole my Fiber One?" No? (pre-emptive comments joke: cereal killers).

However, he's dissatisfied with the flavor and would like a refund.

....I think perhaps it was a substance much like this nutty nugget paste that the Navajo Indians used to make their adobe huts down in the Southwestern portion of the United States...

Paypal is available as a means of transaction.

We sympathize, being unable to go a day without a bowlful of our Crispy Hexagons.

Dave's letter appears after the jump...

"Dear Inter-American Products,

I went to Fred Meyer, a local grocery store, to buy some Grape Nuts a month ago, and I was wooed away from that purchase by your 'Nutty Nuggets' brand cereal. Only now a month later, do I realize how extremely poor of a judgment I made by going with 'Nutty Nuggets'.

Recently, I've noticed my bank account average balance somewhere around about 3 dollars, so cash definitely was a contributing factor to the decision. When I was a kid my dad would say "Dave....the generic brand is just as good as the name brand, only cheaper". Well....maybe that was true when he was a child, but I think here in the 21st century, 'Nutty Nuggets' presents tangible evidence to the contrary.

I'm still kicking myself because I thought I had learned this lesson a few years back. I was shopping down at the same Fred Meyer when I made the fateful decision to buy a generic version of Q-tips brand ear cotton swabs. Q-tips were far and away the most expensive product of their kind on the shelf. In case you didn't know, here's an interesting factoid so I can save you the potential emotional distress. With Q-tips, you get more cotton on the end than with the generic brand. The generic brand reminds me of sticking a plastic stick in my ear. With cotton swabs, you definitely are making a serious commitment with the 500 pack, it takes the better part of two years to clean your ears that many times! My ear has been wishing for the last three years that I had not made that money-saving, painful purchase. Last Christmas my ear actually tried to steal Santa's beard at the local shopping mall because it was jealous of the plethora of cotton hanging off of that jovial man's chin.

I was kind of side tracking there for a moment....Getting back to your 'Nutty Nuggets', sure they look like grape nuts, hell...even the box looks like a grape nuts box...but buying this bag of Nutty Nuggets reminded me of waking up on Christmas, unwrapping your big present, finding an empty box and realizing your whole family is behind you laughing and pointing at you. In my bag of 'Nutty Nuggets', a very fine wheat powder is prevalent throughout the entire box. The last time I went to pour a bowl of Nutty Nuggets, it looked like I was pouring dust into my bowl. There is nothing more disappointing then looking out my window on an inclement Seattle day, followed by stumbling downstairs to discover...yet another heaping bowl full of sawdust waiting to be consumed. After I pour milk onto it, It turns into this very wheaty, pasty, tasting mud....I think perhaps it was a substance much like this nutty nugget paste that the Navajo Indians used to make their adobe huts down in the Southwestern portion of the United States. Is it nutritious?

I don't doubt it's probably one of the most nutritious substances known to man, is it tasty...?

I think not.

I saw on the box that if I wanted a refund I had to send you the box back. If you'd like your bag of Nutty Dust back, I'd be more than happy to ship it back to Cincinnati....the smarter half of me is thinking the guy opening the envelope will be just about as disappointed to rise on a cold Cincinnati morning and open packages of dusty Nuggets. How about we save both of us the trouble and I just set it outside for the pigeons so at least someone will be 'coo-coo-ing' with delight.

Let me know, I'd like a refund if possible. I don't have the price, but it's worth a dollar maybe a dollar and a quarter to me. I've included my contact information above. I have a pay pal account at dave[redacted]@[redacted].com, so....if you wanted to send it there, that's an option too.

Thanks,

Dave"

[pic]

A positive correlation seems to exists between MSG presence and McDonald's sausage-based items.

Two other non-breakfast items, Chicken Selects Premium Breast Strips and Creamy Ranch Sauce are listed as containing the glutamic acid.

A small portion of the population is MSG intolerant and can develop one or more of the following symptoms: burning sensations, rapid heartbeat, headache, nausea, numbness in the back of the neck, radiating to the arms and back, violent dreams, etc. etc.

And with the dollar menu, getting high with The Ronald is cheaper than ever!

"Food Allergen & Sensitivity Info" [McDonald's] (Thanks to Courtney!)

"You'll have to use your imagination here. Think of the Cereal as if it were to "come to life" as a person. Consider everything you know about the Cereal, including the product's packaging, marketing and advertising.

Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you're viewing this in an RSS reader, click through to view in your Javascript-enabled web browser.

Now that you've turned your breakfast cereal into a companion, seek help. After that,

Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you're viewing this in an RSS reader, click through to view in your Javascript-enabled web browser.

We clicked on the "Dozens Fall Ill at IHOP in Arkansas" story almost as a lark. I mean, no kidding, right? The real story at 11 might be "Dozens eat at IHOP, leave with stomachs full, throbbing with robust vigor."

Nevertheless, the story surprised us. It wasn't leaden pancakes soaked in lard and brown-dyed sugar water that sent the customers to their toilets. It was a consumerist terrorist attack!

Apparently, someone surreptitiously sprayed the inside of the IHOP with tear gas. So not only did the customers leave the restaurant with squirting sphincters and leaden stomachs, but with serious respiratory problems to boot.

Still, it could have been worse. They could have eaten at Bickfords.

comment on this post

Dozens Fall Ill at IHOP in Arkansas [Breitbart.com]

What's the problem? Through years of inbreeding, the banana's nethers have completely withered, making it impossible to grow one without taking cuttings. The banana's genetic base has collapsed, making it impossible for the plant to produce sexually. This inbreeding has also made the banan highly susceptible to the black sigatoka fungus, to the point where the farmed banana may die out in a global epidemic.

Worse yet, in the dark jungles of India where the wild bananas grow, massive foresting is driving the species to extinction. And New Scientist warns "it could take a massive global effort to save the banana."

What's interesting about news like this is that the banana is a good example of the advantages of genetically modifying foods. In this case, gene splicing may be the only way to guarantee cold golden wedges in your cornflakes in the morning. Unfortunately, many of the wild banana plants with the genes that could make the consumer banana healthy and disease-impervious again have already been lost. For example, one variety that contains genes that resist black sigatoka survives as a single plant in the botanical gardens of Calcutta.

A Future With No Bananas? [New Scientist]

In 1961, FCC chairman Newton R. Minnow declared television a "vast wasteland." Twinkles was part of a trend that followed that tried to use animation and cartoons for educational purposes.

Seems like a much better idea than those asinine games and jumbles.

Sources: Exquisitely Bored in Nacogdoches, TV ACRES, Austin Chronicle.

Under the old guidelines, bottlers could slap Vermont on the label even if the syrup wasn t completely from the 14th state, so long as the name appeared only in the bottom third of the label.

It was discovered that people looking at a maple syrup label with a company name with Vermont in it on lower part of label thought that was Vermont maple syrup," said Henry Marckres, Vermont s chief of consumer protection.

One affected bottler, Maple Grove of Vermont, may have to either devise a new logo or list the origins on its bottle. That would make for a difficult read as it purchases syrup in Canada, New Hampshire, Maine, New York and Vermont.

Steve Jones, general manager for Maple Grove is concerned about the adverse affect on his marketing. "Most people, as long as it has sufficient contact with Vermont," he said, "they consider it Vermont syrup. They don't care where the tree is."

Tell us, do you like your Vermont syrup from Vermont or are you fine with a cocktail? Also, we know there s more stuff like this where products aren't from where they say they are, let us know your favorites. Bear in mind that your responses need to be better than 'french fries don t come from France.' Everyone knows those fried taters come from freedom.

New Rules for Maple Syrup Labels [Burlington Free Press]