AOL’s Data Release Bothered People So Much They…

• Wrote some haikus.

EXCLUSIVE: AOL’s John Not Paid Hush Money

EXCLUSIVE: AOL’s John Not Paid Hush Money

Remember John? He was the other man on the phone in the AOL cancellation call heard round the world. Despite his voice being played, without his permission, over the internet, on radio and nightly news, no one’s heard a peep from him.

AOL Just Wanted to Help Out The Elbow-Patch Jacket Set

AOL Just Wanted to Help Out The Elbow-Patch Jacket Set

The AOL user search queries data leaked on the internet were apparently posted by a technician who uploaded the data without vetting it through in-house privacy department, company spokesman Andrew Weinstein told WP.

AOL Apologizes For Splooging Your Searches

AOL Apologizes For Splooging Your Searches

A boon for search engine researches quickly tumbled into a privacy snafu as AOL released search query results for 650,000+ users. AOL expression contrition and dismay in the quotes provided by spokesman Andrew Weinstein who said:

Portait of AOL Search as a Young, Strange, Man

Portait of AOL Search as a Young, Strange, Man

This research paper, authored by the same people listed as authors in the AOL data’s README, reveals what AOL had hoped for people to do with the data.

Why Might AOL’s Data Release Be A Big, Big Problem?

Why Might AOL’s Data Release Be A Big, Big Problem?

TechCrunch thinks there could be privacy breaches as people look up personal info which can then be correlated to their other searches.

AOL User 927 Illuminated

AOL User 927 Illuminated

Aroused by the thought of juicy big piles of AOL user search data? Consumerist does the wading for you and finds a delightful little item, AOL User 927.

AOL Releases 500,000+ User Search Records

AOL Releases 500,000+ User Search Records

Internets are aflame overAOL ‘s publication of the search queries for 650,000+ users . This means that it shows what you typed into the AOL search engine, be it “hardball” or “hardcore.”

Calculate Your AOL Retention Bonus!

Calculate Your AOL Retention Bonus!

An exciting add-on for the World of AOL Retention game, The Bonus Calculator!

Another Corpse Billed by AOL

Another Corpse Billed by AOL

Now that AOL’s dissolved their call centers and gone free, we certainly hope that all billing issues customers have been wrestling with have been resolved. In particular, their habit of continuing to bill the dead.

The Hatchet Man of AOL Retention

The Hatchet Man of AOL Retention

Here’s a little ditty about an AOL hatchet man who took a perverse pleasure in firing retention consultants.

TimeWarner Dissolves AOL Retention Centers

TimeWarner Dissolves AOL Retention Centers

TimeWarner announced yesterday an AOL makeover ot make more money with less subscribers. The profit hinged on $1 billion in cost cuts mainly coming from, “the company’s extensive marketing effort to attract new customers and retain old ones,” NYT reports.

AOL Still Retaining Like A MoFugger

AOL Still Retaining Like A MoFugger

AOL may be free, but that didn’t stop them from calling up Matt W. in Chicago, begging him to come back. The rep offered Matt a “new” version of AOL called, “Security Edition.” After an initial “trial period,” Matt could continue using AOL for $9.95/month.

Further Confessions of Former AOL Retainers

Further Confessions of Former AOL Retainers

In light of today’s news that America Online’s content and services are going free, let’s glance at a polaroid of those halcyon days and Monte Carlo nights of yesteryear.

AOL Hates Hugs.

AOL Hates Hugs.

Although several hundred 14 year old boys lose their virginity to portly displaced man-children pretending to be women in AOL’s chat rooms every day, AOL has bigger fish to fry: the sleazy, nefarious hug. Or “((Hugs))” as it is known in AOL chat parlance, where ‘Hugs’ is replaced with the name of the recipient.

AOL Streamliner: Internet With Splenda

AOL Streamliner: Internet With Splenda

AOL may release a new bundled service, Streamliner, designed to straddle its old and new identities.

Phish Threatens to Cancel AOL Account… Oh No!

Phish Threatens to Cancel AOL Account… Oh No!

A phish sent around this morning threatened to suspend our AOL account if we didn’t update our records (our billing information is apparently out of order). As if.