AT&T Announces First Two Locations For Tests Of Internet-Based Landlines

AT&T Announces First Two Locations For Tests Of Internet-Based Landlines

In January, the FCC gave landline telecom providers the go-ahead to begin tests of Internet-based phone service intended to replace existing copper-line phone networks. Today, AT&T finally revealed the two locations in which it would like to kick off its testing. [More]

Alabama Post Office Evacuated Due To Personal Lubricant Spill

Alabama Post Office Evacuated Due To Personal Lubricant Spill

KY Intense Arousal gel is relatively new to the market. It’s billed as a product that can “heighten sensitivity and satisfaction.” Unfortunately, when some of the product spilled in an Alabama post office on Tuesday morning, employees didn’t know what the substance was. All it heightened was a safety alert. The building was evacuated and a hazardous materials team came in to dispose of the mysterious liquid. [More]

(WHNT-TV)

Condo Association Taking Heat For Telling Soldier To Take Down American Flag

The property manager of a condo complex in Alabama is learning that maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to demand that a resident, a Staff Sergeant, take down the American flag hanging outside of his home. [More]

(Passenger Kaitlyn Robertson)

Carnival Triumph Tow Rope Breaks, Prolongs Passengers’ Misery

The passengers of the Carnival Triumph (probably) never imagined that they’d get to extend their trip by several days. They certainly didn’t picture themselves living like 19th-century steerage passengers, if 19th-century steerage passengers had cans of Pringles and defecated in plastic bags. [More]

Lawsuit: Walmart Had Me Arrested, Made Me Lose Job, Had Husband Deported… Over $2.90 Worth Of Chicken Necks

Lawsuit: Walmart Had Me Arrested, Made Me Lose Job, Had Husband Deported… Over $2.90 Worth Of Chicken Necks

A former Walmart employee in Alabama has filed a lawsuit against the retail behemoth, alleging that she and her husband were wrongly accused of stealing $2.90 in chicken neck bones, an accusation the plaintiff says led to her losing her job and having her husband deported. [More]

Adult Store Allows Customers To Swap Guns For Sex Toys

Adult Store Allows Customers To Swap Guns For Sex Toys

Remember the adult video and toy shop in Alabama with the drive-thru window? Well, it’s once again making news with its Valentine’s Day promotion that allows customers to turn in their firearms and get sex toys in return. [More]

Are Drive-Thru Adult Stores The Wave Of The Future?

Are Drive-Thru Adult Stores The Wave Of The Future?

Like it or not, adult videos and sexual aids are a multi-billion dollar business. And while many who purchase these items are more than happy to do so over the internet, some still like the immediate satisfaction of picking up their x-rated goods at the local adult emporium. One such store in Alabama has found a way to make those customers happy without them ever having to leave their cars. [More]

Alabama Schools Paddle Kids With No Way For Parents To Opt-Out

Alabama Schools Paddle Kids With No Way For Parents To Opt-Out

Here’s an type of opt-out list we don’t often write about: Corporal punishment in schools is legal in lots of states, but if you assumed parents could always opt-out, you’d be mistaken. According to a report from WHNT in Alabama, one student was beaten until he was bruised because he failed a science test. [More]

Why A Live Twitter Feed On Your Billboard Might Not Work Out

Why A Live Twitter Feed On Your Billboard Might Not Work Out

The folks at WPMI-TV in Alabama had an idea. They decided to rent an electronic billboard and stream the station’s live Twitter feed to it. What could possibly go wrong? [More]

Alabama Bans Wine Bottle For Giving It The Vapors

Alabama Bans Wine Bottle For Giving It The Vapors

I swan! [Fans face.] Sweet magnolia breeze! I do declare! [Clutches petticoat in pre-swoon anticipation.] Alabama is in a dither over a drawing of a nude nymph on a wine bottle label, so they’ve banned the product from being sold. Their liquor regulations forbid the display of “a person posed in an immoral or sensuous manner” on any alcohol packaging. We have to side with Alabama on this one—after all, we’re not sure you can ride a bike naked without eventually doing something immoral, whether you mean to or not.

The Inmates Get Thinner And The Sheriff's Bank Account Gets Fatter

The Inmates Get Thinner And The Sheriff's Bank Account Gets Fatter

Here’s a grim economics lesson: In Alabama, there’s a law that allows the Sheriff to keep any money that’s left over after feeding the prisoners in the county jail. Can you guess what the result of this conflict of interest might be?

NBC Stations Will Ditch Time Warner Cable Unless They See Some Cash

NBC Stations Will Ditch Time Warner Cable Unless They See Some Cash

Cable companies compensate most of the channels they offer, sharing a portion of the money they get from subscribers with the individual stations– but apparently Time Warner Cable doesn’t share the wealth with broadcast networks — and Austin, TX NBC affiliate KXAN is having none of it. They want some money!

Passengers Watch With Disbelief As Their Allegiant Air Flight Leaves Without Them

Passengers Watch With Disbelief As Their Allegiant Air Flight Leaves Without Them

Over 20 passengers watched in horror as their Allegiant Air flight from Huntsville to Fort Lauderdale took off without them. The passengers had lined up at the gate, tickets in hand, when the plane pushed back. Apparently, the single ticketing agent had struggled to handle everyone on time and didn’t tell the plane to wait. Passengers called the airline once they realized they were stranded as kids shouted, “We want to go to Disney World!”

“So, everybody calls Allegiant Air,” Rigas said. “Three people got hung up on.”

Target Cards You For Buying Jones Soda

Target Cards You For Buying Jones Soda

Reader Daniel would like to let us know that the Target in Huntsville, AL thinks Jones Soda is alcoholic, and they’re going to need to see some ID.

http://consumerist.com/2007/07/30/judge-kenneth-robertson-of-alabama/

Judge Kenneth Robertson of Alabama has sentenced more than 20 people to wear signs reading: “I Am A Thief; I Stole From Walmart.”

Don't Get Benchpressed By A Gym Contract Scam, A Cautionary Tale

Don't Get Benchpressed By A Gym Contract Scam, A Cautionary Tale

So you go through the process of selecting a gym, asking yourself whether you want one close to your house or to work, choosing between opulent technoplaygrounds and piles of torture devices in an old VFW lodge, and most importantly, determining whether your goal is to actually get fit, or get laid.

Walmart Evicts Shoplifters Wearing Signs Reading "I Am A Thief I Stole From Walmart"

Walmart Evicts Shoplifters Wearing Signs Reading "I Am A Thief I Stole From Walmart"

Convicted shoplifters are no longer welcome at Walmart, even if they wear signs proclaiming: “I am a thief, I stole from Walmart.” Walmart was initially gung-ho about the decision to publicly shame the thieves, and even planned to keep the signs for future use. Their dreams of shoplifter shame now lie slightly worn at the return desk after a Walmart attorney told Judge Kenneth Robertson that the shoplifters were persona non grata at Walmart.

Robertson said the attorney said WalMart was afraid “that people might try to run [the shoplifters] down or throw something at them.”

Walmart does not want blood on their hands parking lots. Judge Robertson has ordered the shoplifters to finish their sentence outside his courthouse, where they apparently can’t be run down or have things thrown at them. — CAREY GREENBERG-BERGER

Judge Orders Shoplifters To Wear Signs Reading "I Am A Thief I Stole From Walmart"

Judge Orders Shoplifters To Wear Signs Reading "I Am A Thief I Stole From Walmart"

Don’t steal from the Walmart in Attala, Ala or Judge Kenneth Robertson Jr. will make you wear a sign that says, “I AM A THIEF I STOLE FROM WALMART.”