Is that big zit on your nose making you want to die? No, like, really? Because it might be your medicine, and not the fact that when it heals you’re going to look like Tommy Lee Jones.
Chocolate’s miraculous medicinal properties continue to justify the sweet cocoa bean’s direct correlation with depression and suicide: although it may extend the cellulite rotundity of your posterior, at least chocolate won’t put squirting pimples on your fat ass. Or at least Borba’s new “Chocolate Clarifying Bar” won’t.