halloweenjack commented on Ferrari V4 Motorcycle Concept: If Tron Were a City in Italy

"I just came in my pants a little."

halloweenjack commented on Seinfeld and Gates Are Out, "I'm a Mac" Counterattack Ads Are In

"MS is riffing off something that Apple has done for years?"

halloweenjack commented on Scientists Say Virtual Imaging Colonoscopy As Good As Real Thing, With Less Probing

"I think that they should redo this as an MMORPG: World of Rectumcraft."

halloweenjack commented on Next Generation Stealth Bombers Jump Out of Hyperspace

"If they can squeeze VTOL/hover capability into this thing, I'm getting one to fight crime in Gotham City."

halloweenjack commented on Mobile Star City Is China's Plan to Take Over the World

"Maybe they could put one in Staten Island, cheer up the place a little."

halloweenjack commented on Microsoft Beats Apple's iTunes Genius with MixView

"Funny how the Apple haters on this thread were practically licking their chops at the prospect of the Apple fanboys having a hissy fit, then got all sulky when the fanboys insisted on sticking to the facts."

halloweenjack commented on SideWinder X8 Wireless Gaming Mouse Has Ridiculous 4000DPI, Still Designed by Darth Nerd

"I just got the Sidewinder's corded predecessor, and I'm not that happy with it--it's just not that sexy, even if I pretend that the thumb buttons are twin clitorii."

halloweenjack commented on More Sneak-Peaks at the Forthcoming Zune 3.0 Software

"Since giving up the Zune, Zune Guy has lost 175 lbs., also has gotten a haircut and laid."

halloweenjack commented on Giant Polaroid Flipbook Machine Holds 987 'Roids, Plays Your Short Film

"The obvious genre for films using the ol' Mutoscope, though, should be "Victorian Softcore." Same difference."

halloweenjack commented on The Power User's Guide to Google Chrome

"So, how do I keep porn sites from showing up on "most visited"? I'm, um, asking for a friend."