The Associated Press reported that the alert came after curious seizures since last September at airports in San Diego, Milwaukee, Houston, and Baltimore. Items seized, according to the bulletin, included "wires, switches, pipes or tubes, cellphone components, and dense claylike substances," including block cheese.Cheese is a catalyst for fondue, an explosion of flavor and fun in your mouth.
Logan security remains high as terror concerns are raised [Boston Globe] (Thanks to Dork Esquire!)












Comments
Does this mean they're going to take even LONGER to look through my bags and pull out my water bottles now?
cheese can also be a catalyst for nasty gas, an explosion of stench and misery in the airplane cabin.
Actually, cheese is most likely of a similar consitancy to plastic explosives, and it makes sence to use it in a dry run.
But, Ben told us that the TSA is more of a threat to "make plane go boom" than terrorists, so I'm far more concerned with the TSA keeping their agents on alert than anything else.
Oh, Jeez! *CHEESE*???
Bwahhahahaha! Another tool in my arsenal of destruction - perfect for my jihad against the lactose intolerant!
So I guess this means:
If cheese is outlawed, only the terrorists will have cheese.
First they took my corkscrew, and I said nothing.
Then they took my wine, and I said nothing.
Then they took my camembert, and I said nothing...
C'mon, even the TSA can find a fake bomb once in awhile, though I suspect they were looking for the cheese.
They just had to choose Wisconsin to try to sneak cheese on board. Didn't they know they'd just confiscate it to eat it even if it didn't have wires?
Makes me glad they didn't decide to search me when I had to take a large bag of sand and clay on my carry-on (my mom is a geology professor) when I was returning from vacation on Chesapeake Bay a few years ago. They did give me some weird looks though.
@Scott:
LOL -- reminds me of my brother-in-law returning from a trip to the Pacific Northwest -- his bag was overweight because of all the rocks he brought back.
I think it's official. The terrorists have won. Our freedom to privacy and a right to a speedy flight have been long gone and now the TSA rapes us with their arbitrary rules day in and day out. Maybe they should start force us to urinate at security checkpoints (ammonia, scary stuff you know) and empty out our colons to prevent any hazardous sulfuric compounds from potentially causing noxious gases in the cabin.
You know what the best solution is? They should empty the cabin of all oxygen so that no fires can be started, or better yet fill it with dihydrogen monoxide. I hear that it's great at prventing fires as well.
I wish I could find a picture of Lucy (I Love Lucy), when she returns home from Europe with a 30lb hunk of cheese disguised as a baby.
@SOhp101: Is it the Constitution or the Bill of Rights that assures us a speedy flight? I always forget.
YAY!
Another "What I hate about the TSA/administration/police/government/military/boy scouts" thread.
I do so love them!
@HeyHermano:
Don't be spurious. It's not so much that it's a gross Constitutional violation, but rather that it's an unwarranted, unjustified, and plain dumb intrusion on the lives of Americans. Just because a gov't policy is Constitutional doesn't mean it's not stupid and contemptible.
@Pelagius: But you still got your crackers
@Doc Benway: For the time being...
they finally found a reason to confiscate the cheese to accompany with the wine they took from the travelers.
J. H. Christ! They didn't confiscate a random block of cheese. They confiscated a block of cheese that seemed to be a dry-run for a bomb. I'm GLAD they caught it. It's a GOOD thing that the TSA can do the job they were hired for.
@muddgirl:
Does this REALLY make you feel safer!?
What are they going to do when they start flying commercial flights to the moon? I mean really, how will you keep tourists from just taking a chunk and bringing it back with them?
I'm so confused with a lot of these comments. Airport security with x-ray machines, etc. existed long before 9/11, but people seem to have forgotten that it was a hassle even then. After 9/11, a govt organization took over security with the goal to become more vigilant. Whether it has turned out as expected is separate from whether there is some fundamental evil in security measures.
It's not like this article talks about some new, disgusting tactic by the TSA. Rather, it's talking about a notice for the screeners to be on special alert - based on a pattern that has emerged from items found during routine searches. The TSA may not always work, but this appears to be an example of its efficacy.
If more people thought ahead, wore slip-on shoes for the flight, and left their scissors and sewing needles at home, things would go much more smoothly. Really, if you can't stand the hassle of an extra 20 minutes in line, then don't fly. It's not an intrusion if you voluntarily submit to it.
@HeyHermano: Trick question! The Bill of Rights is part of the Constitution. ;)
But in all seriousness, I'm sure we can get Bush's legal team to prove that the TSA is unconstitutional. If they can justify all of his claims for 'Executive Privilege,' they can justify anything.
@rocnrule: They confiscated a block of cheese wired up to a timer. Is that an innocent, innocuous thing for a passenger to pack in their bags? Do you feel safe with someone trying to see if they can sneak dense, plastique-like substances attached by wires to timing devices into the belly of your airplane?
@HeyHermano:
The Bill of Rights _is_ (part of) the Constitution, and a non-optional one at that... So, being as pedantic as is apparently required, it's the Constitution that _guarantees_ the right to (1) travel anywhere within the US without (2)warrantless detentions, and (3) withought seizure or other taking of private property (without just compensation.)
@rocnrule: You fail at sarcasm. Sorry. =(
@muddgirl: They seized: "'wires, switches, pipes or tubes, cellphone components, and dense claylike substances,' including block cheese."
This was not necessarily all part of one incident. In fact, the article never stated that anything was with the cheese that made it suspicious.
@rocnrule:
People assembling devices that look just like bombs (with the high explosive replaced with cheese or clay) makes me feel a LOT less safe. Do you have a legitimate explanation for these "devices"?
@muddgirl: They claim thats what it was. But the facts are not adding up upon further review, especially since the supposed suspects in the "cheesing" are a white elderly couple, and not your typical Muslim/white supremacists/neo con nutty.
IE they are making shit up to make them look good and to make us be fearful.
Okay, not being able to have water is pretty crappy, but who cares if you can't have cheese? Seriously...you pack your carry-on for flight, and it's "Magazine...check; iPod...check; passport...check....cheese...DAMN! Can't take cheese! Goddam terrorists."
@muddgirl and similars:
Last time I checked, cheese wasn't on the list of prohibited items, bombs were... If I have cheese in the same bag as wires (as was the case here) or eve... if they need remedial help.
Bye, bye cheese!
@humphrmi: @SOhp101: @artki:
Do you all really believe Al-Queda are not creative enough to come up with a new idea!? A small cessna jet loaded with c4 is as destructive as a fully loaded 747. Unless we think it is the terrorists' goal to destroy the airline industry, I think we need to think a little further ahead. Who's to say this isn't a cruel joke!? Dis they attack the world trade center the 1st time w/ planes? Did they bomb the US Cole, or US embassies with aircraft? Did they attack the UK with planes? No, they are creative enough to change their ways, and to only focus on what they have done in the past is as disasterous. I am positive if they wanted to bomb airplanes again, they will, regardless of the TSA.
@Falconfire:
The "neocon nutty" comment gives you away.
-The warning was confidential to law enforcement detailing actual events in the last months. It was not made public to scare anyone.
>>>
In one case last September, a couple in Baltimore, Maryland, checked a plastic bag with a block of processed cheese taped to another plastic bag containing a cell phone charger. Earlier this month in San Diego, California, a passenger checked a bag containing two ice packs covered in duct tape. The ice packs had clay in them instead of the normal blue gel.
>>>
So, in your enlightened opinion, the TSA should NOT notify law enforcement that this is going on? They should not be concerned with, nor be on the look out for this type of behavior?
The only thing louder than your hysterical shreiks of "NeoC0n Fashizm!!!" will be your howls claiming incompentence when the next "plane goes boom" occurs.
@rhombopteryx:
As I was saying, Bomb or not? Should be mandatory.
Amendment 6 guarantees the right to a speedy trial.
Air flight is indeed quite trying these days...
@rocnrule:
Your correct. But because a method is not 100% foolproof and effective does not mean it should not be utilized.
Americans still get botulism. SHould the USDA be dismantled because, no matter what, tainted meat will still get thru the system.
No matter what rules OSHA makes up, workers still get hurt on the job, should OSHA be closed as well?
@nequam: Scissors (up to 4") and sewing/knitting needles are actually allowed, per TSA regulations.
Maybe people are confused because the regulations make no sense. Guess what else is allowed? A 7" phillips head screwdriver. Think you couldn't kill someone with one of those just as easily as you could with a box cutter?
@rocnrule: You know what, you're absolutely right. The only 100% SUREFIRE WAY to prevent terrorism is to BAN ALL PEOPLE ON PLANES! That way NO terrorist will EVER be able to get on flight!
You'll never win, terrorists! We'll take away our OWN freedoms long before you can take away ours! Take THAT!
@nequam: "If more people thought ahead, wore slip-on shoes for the flight, and left their scissors and sewing needles at home, things would go much more smoothly. Really, if you can't stand the hassle of an extra 20 minutes in line, then don't fly. It's not an intrusion if you voluntarily submit to it."
But, but, but... if I did those things, then I wouldn't be able to complain about the fascist TSA invading my privacy.
Very well said.
@Mojosan:
All I am saying is I don't feel any safer today than yesterday. I don't think they should ban the TSA, I think the anti-terrorism efforts should be spread out elsewhere, and as Bill Maher suggests, we need a "fly-at-your-own-risk airline". There are simply far too many other things to kill you long before you need to worry about a terrorist bombing. The airplane itself is more likely to kill you than a terrorist.
@SOhp101: We'll take away our OWN freedoms long before you can take away ours! Take THAT!
Hear, hear!
@Pelagius: Oops, sounds like I used a bad example. But my point remains.
@ROCNRULE
You don't feel safer? Why not? it's been years since september 11 and you are telling me you don't feel safer now than then eventhough we haven't been attacked again since then?
I hate the lines and delays at airports as much as everyone else. And I've been stopped and had my bags opened and searched all the way through twice and I was ticked off both times but.....
You all really think that all this security hasn't atleast prevented a few cases of the 9/11 incident happening again are really living in some perfect world bubble.
You focus on the fact it was cheese while totally ignoring how plastic explosives could be be pretty close in size and consistency.
It's pretty obvious that eventhough wrong decisions have been made. The government is definitely TRYING to protect you from being used in a terrorist plot.
That was my block of cheese in Baltimore.....my bad.
@Mojosan: They CLAIMED this, the alternate from the couple involved is that there was no such thing, and that it was just a block of cheese in a bag.
Which do I think is more accurate, a block of cheese in a bag? Or a block of cheese with a timing device or whatever taped to it being stopped by the same guys who let REAL BOMB CASINGS through in the last government run testing of the airports.
@nequam: (NSFW) Goatse? Is that you?
@miburo:
I will only feel safer when douche bag is no longer president. He is single-handedly making us all less safe, every day. No amount of security will make up for the destruction he has done. Perhaps we should focus more on impeachment, and foreign policy, and perhaps start to look at why they attack. The only way to beat terrorists is to offer them a better way of life, and certainly not forcing it on them. That is why we're in this mess in the first place.
@rocnrule: Says the Canadian.
>>>>
The only way to beat terrorists is to offer them a better way of life, and certainly not forcing it on them. That is why we're in this mess in the first place.
>>>>
So if we offer them a better way of life they won't murder 3000 New Yorkers anymore?
Ok, good to know.
@Everyone
Whether if it was cheese or not, if there was any extra suspicion that it might be a bomb, I would want them to check it out. It's not like it said "elderly couple arrested for cheese in baggage"
@ROCNRULE
And how do you propose that we offer them a better way of life? Don't tell me you actually think this is true.
@MOJOSAN
and we were lucky it was 3000! initial estimates we 10k+ but luckily a lot of people were out of office (including one of my best friends)
@miburo: Right and Hitler blamed the loss of WWI and the depression in germany on the Jews and we saw where that one led to.
There is a fine line between being on the lookout and being 1984. Right now we are clearly 1984. You cant even crap in a airport without security being called about a possible gas attack, while real threats walk right through.
Its like AIRPORT (I think it was AIRPORT, maybe it was II), where the security went after the old lady while the terrorists walked right on through with their buddys with rockets and bombs and guns in plain sight.... sept that is ACTUALLY HAPPENING right now, and has been shown to happen numerous times by our own fucking government.... while we hunt down the evil CHEESE.
>>>
as Bill Maher suggests, we need a "fly-at-your-own-risk airline".
>>>
Do you think Bill Maher would fly on such an airline?
Would you place your children on a flight where there was no security screening because "they are going to to die someday anyway" right?
How about if when you were boarding "Fly-at-your-own-risk" airlines there was a young, bearded man shouting "Allah akbar?" You'd be perfectly okay with him expressing his right of free speech....wouldn't you???
Simple questions.
>>>>
security went after the old lady while the terrorists walked right on through with their buddys with rockets and bombs and guns in plain sight.... sept that is ACTUALLY HAPPENING right now, and has been shown to happen numerous times by our own fucking government
>>>
And if they don't stop blue eyed grannys to balance things out, you, and your ilk, will be shreiking about racial profiling.
@ FALCONFIRE I fail to see what Hitler and the Jews has to do with anything i'm talking about? I'm asking for a actual method to his "Show them a better life and they'll stop hating us"
So what do you propose our TSA to do? Stop looking for suspicious items? I don't understand your guys solutions to the problems. There is a reason why they look for what they do. It's not like they pick something randomly even if you think it is.
Do you not realize that people are actually making a coordinated and money backed attempt to kill us? And they specifically have used airplanes to do this already?
AND BTW, I have almost no disagreements about most of the people here's view on our foreign policy,
But that does nothing to change the fact we need extra security to protect us and our loved ones lives