Consumerist

A long time ago, I was an exchange student in Adelaide, Australia, and my classmates once asked me to tell them about American football. After explaining the rules of the game, I told them about the pretty cheerleaders that entertain the fans.

"What do they do?" I was asked.
"They root for the team," I replied.
"They root? For the team? The whole team???"

I've got a great just now! I shall take a word that is unoffensive and, though known by everyone, is not used too often; coin the word as a new demeaning slang term, and in a few years everyone will be censoring this once innocent word out of usage.

@Omi: That first sentence should have read "I've got a great idea just now!"

@Landor: /facepalm
btw for those who don't geddit: 'root' as described by urban dictionary.

Bill O'Reilly has lost the war against Christmas, clearly.

@Omi: thanks for the clarification.

Someday we will have to communicate through grunts and pointing so we don't offend anyone with our words.

It's absolutely ridiculous that a mispronunciation, that is just slang and will be out of our vernacular someday (along the lines of saying, "Gee, that's swell."), can completely cancel out acceptable usage of an innocent phrase that has been with us at least a century. People are morons.

Also: gardeners may no longer refer to their tools as "hoes," as it's clearly demeaning to women.

This sounds like one of those urban myths right wingers propagate to show that the world is anti-Christian. I don't believe this story as told.

if you flip the letters in santa, it spells satan. maybe christianity should declare war on him, too!

@stanfrombrooklyn: Well put; I think your instinct is correct. The "ha ha ha" vs. "ho ho ho" story rattled around last week as if it was indicative of some huge societal meltdown (fiction) instead of the inconsequential goof-up of one misguided fool in a staffing agency on the other side of the world (fact).

Now, some old Santa gets canned and decides to capitalize on the publicity so that maybe he can land a gig elsewhere. Of course he's going to cast himself as the "ho ho ho" martyr! It's actually a pretty clever, if cynical, way to make the puffed-up "War on Christmas" hysteria work for him. Santa's nothing if not crafty.

I think that Santa is racist to Jews. He has never once came down my chimney nor have I ever met another jew that received a gift from Santa on Christmas.

I thought you just couldn't say "Nappy headed ho ho ho"

@Omi: Kind of like what Dan Savage did to [Rick Santorum]?

Good to see that the USA is not alone in having all the stupid and inane people in the world.

Well, as long a the ''santa'' didn't have golden teeth, and a silver chain with big wording ''pimp'', I don't see how ''Ho, ho, ho'' could be offensive.

Every word could carry some sexual connotation. Forbidding Santa saying ''ho, ho, ho'' is ridiculous. He's the last guy you expect of using this kind of slang. And I doubt that Santa says it by pointing finger on kid's mothers.

@niteflytes1: I find your crude physical gestures to be sexually offensive and demeaning, not to mention mocking of mutes and those with speaking disorders. I suggest we simply walk around with small whiteboards and markers for communication. The mandatory "Marker Safety" seminar will be held at 3PM in the lunchroom.

And to the ha-ha-ha Santas? Watch out when you start laughing at some depresso gun-carrying teenager.

So if I say, "Ha, ha, ha. What do you want for the holidays, you dirty, slutty whore?" that's okay?

Funnily enough, it didn't work out too well when I tested it out on my Mom.

Whore whore whore....nothing says Merry Chistmas more than that.

@mammalpants: ("Santa" is cryptographically "Satan")

Well, the Good Book does say The Beast will be adored, respected and bring peace on Earth. Before all the, y'know, boils, weevils, raining frogs and smoking-hot soul-suckers wearing Wal-Mart vests.

Aw geez. Now I know exactly how Rosemary's Baby felt.

@Johnny: "Santa's nothing if not crafty."

(cough) Well, err, so's The Beast.

Yeah, I'm surprised this story didn't come from the US. Political correctness is rampant here. Most large companies these days don't have "Christmas" parties. Instead, they have "end of the year" parties. Or "December Holiday" parties. Sheesh.

Here we go with the Politically Correct bullshit again. I am sick and tired of the ACLU and other communist organizations that are trying to put the squeeze on my Christian holiday.

This year, those Aussie Santas have a tough row to ha.

all i want for christmas is a crunk cup.

@Landor: Wow, that's funny. Of course, it's probably not that far off....

It reminds me of a trip to England on business to install a server. The guy I was traveling with was a smoker, and about as American as you can get. This was the first time he had ever set foot outside of the U.S.

Our liaison for the customer was also a smoker.

Well, we are standing in front of the server. It has just crashed for the fifth time today, and it's only 10:00 AM. The customer liaison decided to propose a smoke break.

He said, "Right. Well. Want to step out and have a fag, then?"

I wish I had a camera a that moment; the look on my co-worker's face was positively priceless.

@kc2idf: As I read, I could see where that conversation was going, yet I'm still ROFL! Mastercard moment there.

The root story is absolutely true. I once told it to an old girlfriend, a former high school cheerleader, and she laughed really hard and then got really quiet. Hmmmm.

@stanfrombrooklyn: You are correct sir. Snopes sez: EL FALSO


[www.snopes.com]