DirecTV claims to rent Tobin the TiVo he bought off eBay. He was first tipped off when he received a $600 bill he knew to be false. After all, "I get my porn on the internet, I don't need pay-per-view." Tobin tried to reason with DirecTV, which only resulted in this mind-numbing transcript:

DTV:"We're showing that you have an unreturned DVR from January 10th"
Tobin:"Is that the HR 10-250?"
DTV:"Yes."
Tobin:"Do you realize that DirecTV hasn't offered that model for sale for well over a year?"
DTV:"Well, I'm showing that we sent you a HD DVR and billed you for it."
Tobin:"You're showing that you sent me a DVR that you don't sell? I bought that on Ebay. You've made a mistake. You don't sell that DVR."
DTV:"But we're showing that you have an unreturned DVR here, sir."

directv madness [No maps for these territories]
(Photo: SpooSpa)