Which Is Worse To Get Caught Drunk Eating On Video: Styrofoam Or Chips Off A Train’s Floor?

There’s something about today that is bringing in evidence of some behavior we’ve all likely been guilty of: Eating while drunk and feeling like whatever you’re consuming is just the best darn [insert preferred drunk food/cheese] you’ve ever ingested. But in the two videos the Internet has dumped ashore today, we’re pretty sure these people take that guilty pleasure to new heights.

Because your sarcasm hats are firmly on and you can read headlines, I assume you’ve realized that these people aren’t eating tasty things, exactly — in one case, chips scooped off a Metro North train’s floor, in the other, large bites out of an extruded polystyrene container (because styrofoam is a trademarked word for insulation, someone would otherwise point out).

And although there will be no answer to the question of “Why? Why would you eat chips off a train’s floor/an inedible, flavorless container?” we felt a need to ask which one is ultimately grosser.

On the one hand, chips are a food item. Dropping them on a well-traveled and likely germy surface is pretty disgusting, but according to Gothamist the girl caught on video doing just that allegedly ate a $5 bill right before the eyewitness started filming her as she went for the chips with gusto. So that certainly ups the ante, though we don’t see her in action.

Meanwhile, this guy in the United Kingdom (via Gawker) seems to be quite enjoying his extruded polystyrene container mixed with whatever food it was designed to hold.

They both look so happy, it’s almost a shame to be amused. But amused we are, so let’s vote: