Apply For A Job Or Shoplift A Sex Toy, But Not Both During Same Shopping Trip

It’s good to multi-task and combine errands in one trip, saving time and fuel. It isn’t such a good idea to get drunk, then visit a sex shop in order to steal an “adult toy,” then apply for a job at the same shop.

Actually, we recommend only doing any given one of those things at the same time. Yet one Florida woman didn’t ask for our advice before her fateful shopping trip. According to police, the 23-year-old left her contact information, inquiring about working at the store. After she left, the store manager noticed a product missing from its display.

Sure enough, surveillance cameras showed the job applicant fussing with her clothing near the display, “in an action consistent with concealing the device within her pants.”

By the time police caught up with her, the woman had allegedly opened and used the device: as the police report explained, it was “no longer in a condition to be returned to the business.” Indeed. At the same time, though, she didn’t remember stealing it, what with being drunk and all. She did confirm that it was her image on the surveillance video.

So, remember, kids: Drinking, applying for jobs, and shoplifting: only do one of these things at a time. Except you shouldn’t shoplift.

Woman accused of stealing adult toy, then inquiring about job (via CBS Tampa Bay)