Sprint Now Offering Guranteed Unlimited Everything For All Eternity

Always and forever?

Always and forever?

Like the Fountain of Youth, wireless customers always seem to be on a quest for the truly unlimited plan. Often, just when we think we’ve grasped it, it slips out of our hands like some ephemeral bit of Holy Grail hallucination when carriers yank it away. Sprint claims it has what those customers are looking for with its new unlimited talk, data and text plans, and is guaranteeing it forever. For. Ev. Er.*

In its latest move to show everyone that it can play with the big boys, Sprint unveiled two new plans — Unlimited, My Way and My All-in — along with an Unlimited Guarantee. Basically as long as that line is on Sprint, everything will go on forever without end. Well, while you’re paying for it:

The Sprint Unlimited Guarantee guarantees customers unlimited talk (calls to any wireline or mobile phone), text and data while on the Sprint network, for the life of the line of service. This guarantee is applicable to both new and existing customers who sign up for Sprint’s new Unlimited, My Way plan or My All-in plan. These plans and The Sprint Unlimited Guarantee are available starting July 12.

Starting at $80 per month on both plans, Sprint is shifting toward the family sharing model with data packages for up to 10 devices per account. You don’t have to have unlimited data, which runs for $30 on top of the initial $50 for a single phone, but the 1GB plan will save you just $10.

The My All-in plan goes for $110 if you need 5GB for mobile hotspot usage.

We know what you’re thinking — Sprint has a pretty widespread reputation for having data speeds slower than your nana is to accept that you don’t play with Barbies anymore, so what’s the point in having unlimited data if it takes eons to do anything? But Sprint claims it’s beefing up its 4G LTE coverage, with 110 markets now on LTE train.

We’re looking for catches in this deal, but thus far haven’t uncovered any — as long as you pay your bill. Oh and it’s not transferable to anyone else, which we can’t imagine anyone needing unless Sprint decides to yank the unlimitedness for new customers in the future.

*Reference to The Sandlot. Had to be done, apologies if you haven’t seen it and go watch it now.