Shoplifter Apologizes For Beating Up Walmart Greeter

We’ve posted a lot of stories over the years about Walmart greeters who have been on the receiving end of punches, slaps and other forms of assault, but we think this might be the first time we’ve heard of the attacker trying to apologize for his actions.

It all began Wednesday evening at a Walmart in Lawrence County, PA., where a 19-year-old attempted to shoplift around $200 worth of window decals (Why?) but was spotted by store employees.

According to KDKA in Pittsburgh, the decal thief then got into an altercation with a store guard. The 72-year-old greeter tried to break up the fight — it didn’t go very well.

“The Walmart greeter… came over to stop the altercation and the male actually grabbed him and slammed him down, thus fracturing his hip,” a police officer tells WPXI-TV.

The shoplifter managed to escape, leading police on a 100mph chase that ended when his car hit a tree.

“I apologize for what has occurred,” the suspect said after being taken into custody. “I am praying for [the greeter's] recovery.”

The greeter is expected to undergo surgery today. Meanwhile, the apologetic attacker faces charges of aggravated assault, assault on a law enforcement officer, fleeing and eluding police, retail theft, simple assault and endangering the welfare of another person.

All for some stupid window decals.