Man Tries To Rob Cash Register, Opts To Put A Puppy Down His Pants Instead

What sets a quality retail thief apart from your run-of-the-mill shoplifter is their ability to adapt. Take for example, the man in NYC who, realizing that he couldn’t crack open the cash register, saw possibility for profit by stashing a pricey puppy in his pants.

Luckily for the Internet, the entire thing was caught on tape.

You can see in the video that the man’s accomplice distracts the pet store’s cashier by calling him over to take a look at a pug.

While that happens, the thief attempts to open the register — three times — to no avail.

But rather than give up or escalate the situation to threats of violence, he sees an opportunity… in the form of a 10-week-old Pomeranian that retails for $1,000.

“The puppy is trying to get out, and he’s pushing it back in,” the store’s owner tells the NY Post. “Then he covered it with his shirt.”

The store is now offering a $500 reward for the pup’s return.

Comments

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  1. CosmosHuman says:

    Don’t order the schnitzel…they’re using schnauzer!

  2. Portlandia says:

    Is that a puppy in your pants or are you just happy to see me?

  3. Mr. Fix-It is trapped in a collection of half-working appliances says:

    I advise against putting anything with teeth and a tendency to panic that close to your junk…

  4. Chairman-Meow says:

    I was hoping little puppy would have looked for a chew-toy once Mr. Criminal shoved it down his pants.

  5. grebby says:

    People still buy puppies at pet stores?

  6. RadarOReally has got the Post-Vacation Blues says:

    I hope no harm comes to the poor dog!

    • RadarOReally has got the Post-Vacation Blues says:

      P.S. An unfortunately typoed “n” nearly changed the entire meaning of the above post!

  7. Invader Zim says:

    Perfectly “normal” reaction. ~

  8. triana says:

    We caught a guy trying to stuff a laptop down his pants at a store I used to work at. One of the associates came by just in time and he tossed it on a shelf, but I would have loved to see how that worked out for him. He was wearing jeans, and they weren’t baggy.

    I WISH I could get a hold of that security tape.

  9. glp1233 says:

    Would that qualify as a “hot dog?”

  10. Draw2much says:

    I went “What? o_0 ” when I read the header of this post. And my husband caught a glimpse of what I was reading and went “WHAT?! lol…”

    This has got to be the funniest header I’ve ever read on Consumerist….

    Also, I feel sorry for that puppy. I hope they find a good home for it. (Because I’d rather them return it or sell it, but not keep it themselves, ya know?)

  11. Cor Aquilonis says:

    Cellmate: “Whattr ya in for?”

    Thief: “Shoplifting.”

    Cellmate: “What’d ya steal?”

    Thief: …

    Thief: A Pomeranian puppy.

    Cellmate: (Silence, then hysterical laughter)

  12. JollySith says:

    The real crime is people paying $1000.00 for a dog, and keeping puppy mills open and profitable.

    • Costner says:

      I knew I would see this type of comment here, but how do you know the puppy came from a puppy mill? It is just as probable – actually more probable – that it came from a reputable breeder.

      Would I pay that kind of money for a Pomeranian? No… but some people have a certain affinity for the breed so who am I to judge. My last dog (Labrador Retriever) was free, but that is only because my father’s dog had puppies and he didn’t exactly have a use for six more labs.

  13. Press1forDialTone says:

    This is an act of animal abuse.
    If they catch this subhuman evil beast, he should be shot
    at his temple and thrown in a dumpster. For effective ways,
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    call 1-866 -DEATH-TO-ANIMAL-ABUSERS