Having a bit of a brain biff when it comes to naming your baby? Groupon thinks you might want to throw down $1,000 for the honor of having it name your baby “Clembough.” It’s got a deal going on right now that apparently someone has bought, but we’re guessing it’s got something to do with Father’s Day on June 17.
In what pretty much has to be a publicity stunt to gear up for a slew of deals offering the best deals for activities to do with your dad, Groupon is ready to use its naming skills on your offspring.
The offer reads, in part:
A rose by any other name would smell as sweet, but a baby that isn’t named by Groupon smells like missed opportunity. Spray your infant with the perfume of success with this Groupon.
$1,000 for Groupon to Name Your Baby ($1,000 Value)
All too often, the importance of a child’s name takes a backseat to other “needs” such as food, shelter, and clothing. Groupon, the World’s Foremost Authority in Baby Namingâ„¢, has stepped up to address this issue. Upon your child’s birth, Groupon will relieve you of the burden of naming your baby by bestowing a specially selected, custom first name upon your infant son or daughter. Purchasers will e-mail Groupon with their voucher number, and we will e-mail you back with a name for your child based on the name’s aesthetic value and for how it might look emblazoned on a trophy one day–for a child named by Groupon will grow tall and proud, and he or she will be a beacon of hope in a world that is in such desperate need of one. Don’t settle for non-Groupon-approved names such as Kevin or Bridget–let us gift your sweet child with a moniker for the ages.
As always, there’s some fine print, setting limits like “Spelling non-negotiable,” and “any attempt to name your child ‘Clembough’ independent of this exclusive Groupon will be recognized by the world as a cheap imitation.”
We can’t wait to hear about all the baby Clemboughs soon to be toddling around.