We watch a lot of real estate shows here at Consumerist HQ, especially the many variations on the “show three places and pretend to pick the one that you’re already in escrow on.” And while home buyers always remember to ask, “Are there HOA fees?”, they don’t ask the more important questions, like “Why in the world am I buying a place with an HOA?”
This is because homeowners associations, while often well-intentioned, can tend to be directed by a small group of homeowners with an obsessive need for uniformity and a dislike for dissent.
Sadly, those homeowners who don’t throw a fit when their neighbors paint their shutters robin’s egg blue instead of cornflower are also likely to be the last ones to vie for control of an HOA.
Thus, you end up with the following examples/reasons of why you may want to think twice, and probably thrice, before buying a home within the dominion of an HOA:
7. They will create new forms of math to make sure no one dares put up the wrong Christmas lights.
6. They think your wee flower garden is an act of treason worthy of $6,000 in fines.
5. They will try to foreclose on your house over $267.58.
4. They will call private security guards to forcibly remove tenants who are legally occupying a home.
3. They will threaten to sue you if you use the neighborhood’s name on a Facebook page.
2. They want your dog’s DNA — and they want you to pay for the test.
1. They tried to mess with Steven Seagal.
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It’s almost impossible to avoid these associations if you live in Grand Traverse County, MI. Close to 90 percent of property listing are in these controlled subs. No you can’t build a handicapped house here, no you can’t have a house smaller than 1500 sq ft, etc. etc. etc. I might get desperate and broke trying to win the lottery to buy a farm with no restrictions.
Give me my slavery please I wantz to live in a socialist HOAS. Me likes the test tube antiseptic lifestyle. BORING!
I bought a condo for my in-laws and it has a HOA with large fees. Last September a branch went through the roof. The holes on the inside were the size of a pencil. It took 6 weeks of daily nagging to get them to initiate a repair. They finally find the absolute lowest priced roofer they could, It rained in the meantime. New roof, but the walls are full of water, molding, sweaty walls. Couple months ago they finally got someone to drain and repair the walls. So now, there are giant holes in various rooms. They won’t spend a penny they don’t absolutely have to, okay……. but now, they have painted a big red X on every tree in the neighborhood. These huge trees are what make the place look nice. Property values will drop once they spend the tens of thousands to remove all the trees. Once all the holes are patched, I want to sell the place, hopefully before they can find someone cheap enough to cut down these massive trees.
These are the trees they are going to remove. Imagine what the place will look like without trees.
http://g.co/maps/qhd69
I was a vegetarian for about 3 years, until I realized how irrational it was one day. If you have to take vitamins and supplements in addition to your diet, you’re doing something wrong. Humans have been eating large amounts of animal fats and protein for tens of thousands of years, it’s what you’re body needs. It wasn’t until the last few decades that the people who think they know better than millions of years of evolution started telling everyone to start eating like rabbits. It’s not good for you folks. Also, if you think cholesterol is going to kill you, look into the “lipid theory” that all this is based on, and the idiots and corruption behind it. Your body needs cholesterol for so many things, its not some kind of poison. (and yes, I understand some people have legitimate reasons they can’t eat meat, I’m not talking to them)
Meh. You can argue orderliness all you want, but HOA’s essentially exist as a crutch for some people to avoid learning to tolerate other people who are very different from them in various respects. And you can argue “just don’t live there then,” but as some of these posts demonstrate, sometimes these fuckers pop up like damn scary ass jack-in-the-boxes in neighborhoods where a lot of people are already living and were doing just fine without them.
I love living in a place where my freedoms are curtailed for sake of my neighbor’s property values (AKA market popularity) by a non-government organization with no oversight.
Really, if these things continue to exist at all, they should be governmental with proper restrictions and oversight. If not, they should be neighbors talking to each other like real human beings. That you can be fined by a group of private citizens for having pink flamingos on your lawn is a travesty. And I assure you: Crack houses happen with or without HOA’s. What we’re talking about here is the pink flamingos.