Man Sues BMW For His Constant Erection, Blaming Seat Design

Auto companies get blamed for a lot of things, from health problems to the economy to people driving around in Hummers they don’t need. But BMW North America has a doozy of an odd case on its hands now, as a California man is blaming the company for a persistent erection.

The man is suing BMW and aftermarket seat makers Corbin-Pacific, claiming that he has had a non-stop erection for 20 months. He says the trouble started with his 1993 BMW motorcycle and its “ridge like seat,” says WWJ 950 Newsradio in Detroit.

He’s suing for lost wages, medical expenses, emotional distress and what he calls “general damage.” And beyond all that, he claims he is “now is unable to engage in sexual activity, which is causing him substantial emotional and mental anguish.”

There might not be medical data to support his lawsuit, but experts say anyone, men and women both, can get a feeling of numbness in the genital region after compressing the area for a prolonged amount of time.

Calif. Man Sues BMW For Persistent Erection [WWJ 950 Newsradio]

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  1. FacebookAppMaker says:

    I think BMW should put that in their ads. “Seats so comfortable they give you a constant erection”

    • Bob from Texas says:

      Right. Get sued, and lose or settle BIG TIME! BAM. Mighty testament to the car’s COMPLETE “effectiveness” with the ladies, especially for more, let’s say, “distinguished” gentlemen.

      • JJFIII says:

        Not a car, it is a motorcycle

        • Snowblind says:

          Right. Get sued, and lose or settle BIG TIME! BAM. Mighty testament to the motorcycles’s COMPLETE “effectiveness” with the bitch on the back, especially for more, let’s say, “distinguished” gentlemen.

          /fixed

  2. homehome says:

    20 months? dang, he should lose this lawsuit though

    • Happy Tinfoil Cat says:

      I was watching one of those Nat Geo type programs last week and the natives were walking around with throbbing erections the entire time. I began to question my priorities. Would I have a better life if I lived in a jungle, buck-naked, completely uneducated, eating bugs and whatever varmint I could catch if the upside is a stress-free life full of random jungle sex several times a day?

  3. Cat says:

    I hate to say this but:

    “First world problem.”

    • Naked-Gord-Program says:

      #1percent problem

      • Actionable Mango says:

        In college when all I could afford was a used BMW motorcycle with 160,000 miles on it. Not having a car, I had to ride in the sun, rain, snow, and hail. I couldn’t afford a new battery, so I always parked at the top of a hill to push start it.

        Little did I know that by purchasing the motorcycle I would suddenly be considered to be within the top richest 1%. I must have misplaced my billions in the couch cushions or something.

        • kobresia says:

          Man, that sounds somewhat like the 70s-vintage Triumph I had a few years ago. I had a crappy job, couldn’t afford to put gas in the car, and got the old bike for $500 (and put a little work in to get it running again). I rode it rain, shine, and a few times in the snow.

          It was old enough that it had a kick-starter so at least I didn’t have to park on hills or buy a new battery.

      • kobresia says:

        Nah, HD problems would be 1%-er problems. Both in the sense of the “1%-er criminal motorcycle gang” as well as the “rich guys who can afford a $40k motorcycle” demographics.

        The purchase price on newer BMW bikes can be pretty steep, but 5 years along, most are reasonably cheap and make great commuter bikes, but really lousy status symbols.

        They’re also hard to bling-up and really aren’t sufficiently intimidating, if an outlaw biker gang bent on mayhem were to ride into a small town on BMWs, they’d get laughed right out of town. It would be like the hilariously foolish biker gang in “Chrome and Hot Leather”, who rode Kawasakis (which was presumably the major sponsor of the film). As far as Bikesploitation films from the 70s go, that one was so terrible it was almost awesome.

  4. mistyfire says:

    *hold for laugther*

    I am reminded of this: http://urbanlegends.about.com/b/2009/01/30/cello-scrotum-exposed-as-hoax.htm

    Seriously however, if a seat is uncomfitable and causes a…reaction then why did me not buy a cushion or something?

    • mistyfire says:

      Hell, cough meds and spelling don’t mix…..

    • jefeloco says:

      The cushion is where the Corbin seat comes into play. They are typically custom made to you (if you can swing by their factory) using fancy pants memory foam. My guess is that this guy took too much viagra and celebrex at the same time and then jumped, flying eagle style, onto his bike from his roof.

      Nothing after the second sentence is fact and cannot be used to sue me in a California court of law (I hope).

  5. clippy2.0 says:

    Well, they do say most BMW owners are cocks, so……

    • Jack T Ripper says:

      I guess now when I see an enormous prick on a motorcycle I will know right away it is a BMW bike, eh?

      • DGC says:

        What’s the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? On a porcupine the pricks are on the outside. I know, it doesn’t work too well with a motorcycle, but close enough.

  6. Extended-Warranty says:

    He’s going to have a hard time winning this one. He will face stiff resistance from BMW lawyers.

  7. GuyGuidoEyesSteveDave‚Ñ¢ says:

    Wait, if he is suing an aftermarket seat maker, how is it BMW’s fault?

    • Actionable Mango says:

      Standard tactic these days is to sue everyone and see what sticks.

    • Thumprr says:

      Don’t know if this is the case with the seat here, but some of the accessories in BMW’s catalog are not made or designed by BMW. For instance, BMW will sell exhaust systems or brake pads that are for a BMW bike, but made by a third-party vendor. Sometimes, if that vendor has a significant brand presence (like Corbin, the maker of the seat here), the vendor’s name will appear on the product, too.

  8. Cat says:

    Wait – he has had a non-stop erection for 20 months, but is unable to engage in sexual activity?

  9. wasabirobot says:

    I thought that was exactly why men bought BMWs.

    • jefeloco says:

      BMW Motorrad vehicles are awesome, and two wheeled, and awesome. I want a 1200GS soooooo badly :(

    • Jack T Ripper says:

      Exactly. The only way they can measure up to the average man is to ride a bike which gives them a solid three inches. You don’t buy a BMW because you are rock solid satisfied with yourself and have no need to overcompensate… All people with Bimmers are telling me is that they may have the shortest dick in the world, but at least he can get a loan on a BMW.

  10. Joesph Mama says:

    He should be PAYING BMW.

  11. HowardRoarksTSquare says:

    This doesn’t seem like the worst problem in the world.

  12. Fubish says: I don't know anything about it, but it seems to me... says:

    Wait – he’s suing because he’s got the worlds greatest boner?

  13. Princess Beech loves a warm cup of treason every morning says:

    Gasp. I almost sprayed my lunch on my screen LOL.

    And why is he “unable to engage in sexual activity” if he’s having a constant erection anyway? I can see the “erection” part hindering his social functions due to awkwardness, but it should help in matters of the bed.

    Although… if he can’t hook up with someone because of his erection at a bar, then I guess it sort of indirectly leads to being unable to engage in sexual activity.

    Ah, you gotta love complications.

  14. There's room to move as a fry cook says:

    Note that he is blaming one (1) 4 hour ride for this 20 month erection.

    http://www.inquisitr.com/227423/man-sues-bmw-for-causing-20-month-erection/

  15. kobresia says:

    Solution: If you find the stock motorcycle seat uncomfortable, get another aftermarket seat or have it reshaped by an upholstery shop. Or, if you find your aftermarket seat to be uncomfortable, revert to the stock seat. It was his choice to continue riding the motorcycle without doing anything to correct the problem, it’s all on him. It’s most definitely not BMW’s fault, since it’s not even their OEM seat, and it’s really not on Corbin either since many people find their seats plenty comfortable and not causing priapism.

    I have no complaints with the stock seat on my BMW, but the previous owner had found it to be exceptionally uncomfortable and had used an aftermarket Corbin seat instead, which I wasn’t about to pay extra for because I felt the stock seat was much more comfortable for me. It’s really something that’s up to personal preference and individual body proportions.

  16. Murph1908 says:

    Seems like the solution was already stated in the article. Something about hummers?

  17. lonestarbl says:

    If he bought American… this problem would not exist

  18. There's room to move as a fry cook says:

    It could just as easily be blamed on his pants or underpants size or design. Is he prepared to present others with constant boners caused by riding this bike? I’m sure the defense will present users without boners. Exhibit A your honor.

  19. MrMagoo is usually sarcastic says:

    BMW: Big Man Walking

    I wonder what would happen if he took a Viagra at this point? Would he explode?

  20. Loias supports harsher punishments against corporations says:

    Sounds like a great marketing campaign for BMW.

  21. umbriago says:

    If you have an erection that lasts more than four months, see your BMW dealer.

  22. ellmar says:

    Mercedes Benz commercials give me a perpetual lady boner. Thanks Jon Hamm.

  23. maestrosteve says:

    I don’t know whether he is really complaining, or just bragging.

    Some people will say anything to get a date.

  24. travel_nut says:

    “There might not be medical data to support his lawsuit, but experts say anyone, men and women both, can get a feeling of numbness in the genital region after compressing the area for a prolonged amount of time.”

    My husband’s always laughed at me when I complained of numbness in the gential region (okay, it was more like “oh my god, my vagina’s gone numb”) after an extended time on the motorcycle.

  25. gman863 says:

    Now we know why the’re called “crotch rockets”.

  26. AllanG54 says:

    It’s also been proven that professional bicycle riders can become impotent because of the shape of the bicycle seat on racing bikes. That being said….I’m sure he didn’t have this problem after one ride. I can only imagine the case precedent being set on this one.

  27. Excuse My Ambition Deficit Disorder says:

    Where does one buy this seat…just out of curiosity…of course.

  28. Ashman says:

    The ad should read – “BMW the cure for erectile dysfunction”

  29. ianmac47 says:

    I thought people bought BMWs precisely because of their sexual disfunction?

  30. evilpete says:

    I see BMW sales going up.

  31. Malik says:

    Think of all the money he is saving on Viagra

  32. gman863 says:

    After the suit is settled or dismissed, I suspect this motorcycle with fetch a minimum of $50K on eBay.

    If I win the lottery by then, I’m all in for the bidding.

    • Snowblind says:

      I hear that a Chinese Billionaire is going to buy it and grind it up into fine power…

      got to be better than Rhino horn. Well, at least for the Rhino.

  33. IntheKnow says:

    20 months, Prove it.

  34. makoto says:

    Some articles are just “wow” worthy. Wow.

  35. MrMagoo is usually sarcastic says:

    I think I’d be turning to leaches by now.

  36. Press1forDialTone says:

    The Ultimate Driving Erection, er, Machine. No Viagra, Cialis required. Just take a cross
    country trip alone and end up with a peter that doesn’t even work.
    Geesh. But do guys with BMVs even -have- dicks on the first place, I was always
    under the impression that they didn’t, so not a problem?