Groupon Wants You To Like Clicky, Its Creepy Deal Wheel With A Sad Face

Groupon is hoping you’ll stare deep into the wet brown eyes of its new deal wheel, Clicky, the Clickable Value-Wheel. And as your reward for gazing upon Clicky’s sad mouth, Groupon will let you buy a deal they featured in the past for a discount.

So you don’t really win anything, if you define winning as getting something for free. The Chicago Tribune says users are prompted by Clicky to sign in through Facebook, and then spin the wheel to nab discounts of $5, $10, $50 or $100.

Once you lock your amount in, you must redeem it within 24 hours, and you can only spin once a day — although if you “Like” Clicky on Facebook, you get five extra spins. Wonder what happens if you get “in a relationship” with Clicky?

Not surprisingly, Groupon is going to be the real winner here. According to the Tribune, your chances of winning $100 is one in 100,000; $50 is 1 in 10,000; $10 is 1 in 100; $5 is 1 in 20.

“We want to let users know that the chances of winning are slim, but not impossible,” says a post on the Groupon blog. “As with many online computer games, the win ratio was determined to ensure that the lifetime value of the new customers attracted to Groupon by Clicky, the Clickable Value-Wheel will be greater than the total cost of the program, thus making the program a practical and sustainable investment for Groupon.”

This might be funny if it were a Conan O’Brien talking mouth bit, but alas, as is, it’s just weird.

Groupon launches Clicky, the Clickable Value-Wheel [Chicago Tribune

Clicky, The Clickable Value-Wheel [Groupon blog]

Comments

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  1. Mr. Fix-It says: "Canadian Bacon is best bacon!" says:

    Oh god… why? What design rep/team thought this was a good idea!? Somebody approved this! Somebody paid money for this!

  2. pop top says:

    Ugh, it’s like some mutated Clutch Cargo monstrosity.

  3. Don't Bother says:

    AHHHHHH!

    pant pant…

    AHHHHHHH!

  4. Wachusett says:

    Apparently to spin clicky you need to let Groupon “post status messages, notes, photos, and videos on my behalf” and give groupon access to all your friend’s info.

    That sounded risky and unethical. (A strange wheel offered me a chance at a prize if I told them your birthday…)

    • DariusC says:

      Agreed, it’s a ruse to get information. They have gone the way of Facebook and Myspace, selling info to make money because they can’t innovate. I’ll gladly sweep in and take their market share if they don’t want it!

  5. runnershigh17 says:

    Why should I have to allow groupon to access my facebook to play this game. It is incredibly annoying how anything a company posts online tries to link to your facebook.

    • chijosh says:

      If it requires Facebook, I’m out. In this case, that might be for the best.

    • StarfishDiva says:

      Seconded, seeing as Facebook is farking blocked at my work… but nothing else is. and they watch for proxies….. I just want to spin that Godawful wheel and get a 10% discount on my shitty wine tasting voucher.

  6. Murph1908 says:

    Apparently, Groupon has outsourced their graphic design to a second grade class. They let the first graders name the wheel.

  7. cybrczch says:

    It’s Jar Jar Binks – in wheel form!

  8. Coffee says:

    Congratulations, Prius Golem of Humans…you are now the second-worst piece of marketing I’ve seen in recent memory.

  9. PHRoG says:

    Clickly is certainly going to give me horrid nightmares!

    • PHRoG says:

      Bah…Clicky ;)

      He’s seriously depressing…staring at him makes me wanna go visit my highest building.

    • Karney says:

      He reminds me of your avatar, except with human bits instead. Like some sort of human/frog hybrid nightmare creature.

      • PHRoG says:

        Why thank you!

        However, that honor has already been claimed by the great Hypnotoad!

        For the record, I was shooting for “perpetually confused” PHRoG. ;)

  10. Laura Northrup says:

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

  11. bendee says:

    It’s Clippy’s brother, giving out half-baked prizes instead of half-baked “help”

  12. elephantattack says:

    Watch their video. It’s a joke… Somehow.

  13. kella says:

    I stopped using Groupon when they started giving out customer information to businesses they bought groupons for. If there’s anyone I don’t trust my personal information with it’s tiny local businesses whose owners are desperate for money, and will spam me hourly to beg me to come back (and when I don’t they’ll resell their list to the highest bidder). No surprise that this “wheel” wants permission to spam your friends and record their information.

  14. Alliance to Restore the Republic of the United States of America says:

    OMG WTF is that thing!?!?!?!

    We should take off, nuke it from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.

  15. PsychicPsycho says:

    It’s amazing how Groupon manages to do the most spectacularly stupid thing every chance it gets.

  16. ungeheier says:

    I won $5, but there wasnt any deal I wanted to actually purchase. oh well.

  17. Stella says:

    I thought ALL Groupon’s deals were available at a discount. Isn’t that the whole point of it?

  18. Conformist138 says:

    Imagine if B&M stores were as horribly intrusive with getting our info. “You wanna see what is on sale? TELL ME WHERE YOU LIVE!” “Are you interested in learning about what services our company offers? GIVE ME INFO ON EVERYONE YOU KNOW!” If you refuse, someone picks you up and throws you out of the store onto the curb.

    Seriously, before I even see what this horror is really like, they want me to give up my email address and other info. Sure fire way to make sure I turn away and never return. Though, honestly, seeing that wheel actually spin would have made me flee without making a purchase anyway.

    • MaxH42 thinks RecordStoreToughGuy got a raw deal says:

      So, you haven’t been to Radio Shack lately, have you?

      • Conformist138 says:

        Nope, cuz once a store gets too all up in my business just for picking up a $2 spare part, I don’t return. Luckily, most stores aren’t so awful and accept that I don’t want to participate in their data gathering efforts.

  19. There's room to move as a fry cook says:

    Does this info-grab ‘condition of participating’ violate or conform to state and federal legislation concerning contests and sweepstakes?

  20. Jane_Gage says:

    I have never wanted a penis more than right this second.

  21. Danjalier says:

    Let’s be honest here. We’re all giving this too much attention and Groupon is loving it all.

    It’s plainly obvious that they wanted to put together a crappy promotion with poor design choices, shoot a terrible “you’re supposed to laugh at the absurdity of this” making of clicky video, and just put it out there for the wolves to feast on. On that front, they did a good job.

    Except this thing is just absurd, and not funny in the slightest. Stupid move Groupon. Go do something useful that actually shows you’re in the business to be a business, not in the business of “we have your money so we’re going to waste it however we want.”

  22. working class Zer0 says:

    Looks like one of the characters from Pee-Wee’s Playhouse.

  23. q`Tzal says:

    CLIPPY MUST DIE!

    Oh this is “Clicky”; it’ll be okay.

    Google image results for “clippy must die”: About 23,100 results.

  24. ecvogel says:

    I won $5 on the sixth spin (1 free, plus 5 for liking on FB). I used it for $10 at Plum market so my bill was $0. FREE!! There was one for Fudruckers and other stuff, but for the food places, you need to be paying for two people as I could not spend $16 at fudruckers in one sitting.

  25. shinazzle23 says:

    They should use something like this the next time they try to price their IPO.

  26. pamelad says:

    Too funny! Before reading any reviews, I immediately saw “Clicky” in the same disliked light as Microsoft’s reviled “Clippy.” It was a band of “Clippy” haters (oh gawd it was hard to get rid of it back then). So now we have a very frightening incarnation. “Clicky.” Bad graphics, bad name, bad promotion, Groupon!