Remember those brief few weeks when Netflix said it was actually going to rename its DVD service “Qwikster” and separate it from the Netflix website? Ah, those were the days… And now the deal-minded folks at Woot have put together a bit of prose that allows them to poke fun at Netflix, all while trying to sell some Lenovo Notebooks.
In a blog post titled, “You Did The Best You Could,” Woot writes:
This Lenovo Intel Dual-Core Laptop with 15.6″ LED Display? It’s dedicated to all those who never got their shot.
Andy Rendich. CEO of Qwikster for about a week. You didn’t ask for the media frenzy. You just woke up and came into the office one morning to find out your boss had gone insane. But instead of walking away, as a lesser man might do, you took one for the team. You put your name on that disaster-in-progress and told the world… well, nothing really, because you didn’t even have time to figure out a business plan. But you were gonna do it, pal. You were gonna bring the heat. It was your moment to shine.
And today, you’re just back to the old office, because Qwikster is no more.
Andy, it’s not your fault, okay? You’re like this refurbished Lenovo Intel Dual-Core Laptop with 15.6″ LED Display. It’s got a sweet 2.13GHz processor, and 2GB of DDR3 memory, and a 320GB hard drive, plus Window 7 Home Premium, 802.11b/g/n Wi-Fi, and a 15.6″ widescreen LED display. It’s ready to work, and work hard. But nobody gives it a chance, do they? Just like you, man. Just like you.
But don’t you worry, Andy Rendich. Now your name is out there. Maybe not as out there as a Reed Hastings email, but out there nonetheless. When you go to your next job interview (probably on Tuesday if you’re smart) people are going to say “Rendich? Aren’t you that guy who almost ran Qwikster?” And when you say yes, they’ll shake their head, and maybe even give you a big hug.
Because you’re every kid who was open but didn’t get the ball. You’re every musician who had the chops but couldn’t get airplay. You’re Brando in On The Waterfront, you’re Dave Mustaine, you’re Takeru Kobayashi being dragged away by the cops just before the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. You were there and ready and wanted to go, but someone else took your moment before you could prove yourself.
That dream is gone now, Andy Rendich, but it’s not your fault. Don’t blame yourself. Don’t blame yourself.
[via Hacking Netflix]
I love the narrative on Woot’s daily deals…there are times I read them even if I’m not interested in the products.
I just tried to +1 this. :/
I’ll draw a little +1 on my monitor to always remind me.
I agree wholeheartedly! Their writing is hysterically funny and good for a laugh.
I do the same thing! It makes me wonder how they come up with that stuff every day.
They have a ridiculously good team of writers on staff.
This is one of my all time favorites:
http://www.woot.com/blog/viewentry.aspx?id=19527
I want to work for this company
My husband laughed his caulk off.
The Bacon Salt write up made me want to read all the descriptions.
“Warranty: No Warranty, it’s bacon salt…”
http://www.woot.com/Blog/ViewEntry.aspx?Id=5573
Yes, the narratives are great. Sometimes they’re really effin’ creepy though. Still, the woot writers get kudos.
Touché, Woot … touché. I wonder how well the laptop works. I need a new one.
Depends on your budget…this is a good deal if you’ve got a rigid spending ceiling…if you can afford to spend a bit more, this one is a great deal right now and will be high-end for at least a couple years:
http://slickdeals.net/permadeal/60310/lenovo.com-lenovo-ideapad-y470-laptop-i7-2630qm-2ghz-quad-core-cpu-8gb-ddr3-500gb-hd-14-lcd-1366×768-geforce-gt-550m-dvdrw-wifi-n-hdmi-usb-3.0-6-cell-win-7
Thank you!!!
Don’t tell my daughter, but I’m in for one. Should last her from Christmas through 2½ years of high school, maybe longer.
This is the best, most uplifting thing I’ve heard all day.
I am Andy Rendich.
Now we just need a Spirit Airlines sale mocking this in a completely insensitive and inappropriate way, and life will be complete.
pwnt
For those who don’t know… Woot! is now owned by Amazon.com, Netflix’s biggest streaming competitor.
They would have made fun of Qwikster anyway. Even though Qwikster makes fun of itself.
I’m reading this in the voice of the “Real American Heroes” commercials. Awesome.
Beautiful.
Hah, love the wooticisims. Wonder what the copywriters for Woot do in their off time.
I like to think that they write reviews on amazon.com etc.
Hah, love the wooticisims. Wonder what the copywriters for Woot do in their off time.
“You just woke up and came into the office one morning to find out your boss had gone insane.”
Yeah, that happens to me too. Hate when that happens as it makes a whole lotta work for me.