Camel Wants To Give Hipsters Cancer With Brooklyn-Branded Cigarettes

Showing just how much they have their fingers on the pulse of 2006, the folks at Camel have decided to come out with packaging for their cigarettes that tries to cash in on the hipster cachet of Brooklyn’s Williamsburg neighborhood.

Here is the groan-inducing pitch, straight from Joe Camel’s phallic face:

It’s about last call, a sloppy kiss goodbye and a solo saunter to a rock show in an abandoned building… It’s where a tree grows.

“It’s known as a hipster neighborhood,” a corporate shill tells the Brooklyn Paper. “We’ve found the temperament of what Williamsburg stands for, and its artistic approach to life, meshes with the Camel brand.”

We wonder if Camel will also go for hipster-oriented warning labels on their packaging, like “You will die younger, so you might as well spend all your trust fund now” or “Smoking is a total turn-off to that hot vegan chick who lives in Bushwick.”

Joe Camel — a hipster? R.J. Reynolds markets its smokes to Williamsburg [BrooklynPaper.com via Gothamist]

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  1. McRib wants to know if you've been saved by the Holy Clown says:

    Vegans maybe, but I know tons of vegetarians that smoke.
    And they’re totally hipsters.

  2. ThaKoolAidKid says:

    I’m all for this plan to wipe out the hipster menace.

  3. AstroPig7 says:

    Next they’ll discover hipsters in Omaha. I wonder when they’ll reach Olympia.

  4. TinaBringMeTheAx says:

    “If you’re stupid enough to smoke, you’re stupid enough to fall for this crap, too” is probably how their thinking goes.

  5. drjayphd says:

    Incidentally, the National Cancer Institute just rolled out their latest marketing initiative, a blog titled Look At This Fucking Tumor.

  6. ConsumerPop says:

    Oh my god. THIS is amazing. Can’t wait to see someone pull a pack of these out. Oh wait, I’m never in Williamsburg so that’ll probably never happen.

  7. pokinsmot says:

    This story just reminds me of why I need to quit. Does anybody have any tips for when I finally make the plunge? I got chantix from my doctor, but I am nervous to start taking it.

    • McRib wants to know if you've been saved by the Holy Clown says:

      Stay away from bars, and any friends and co-workers that smoke.
      Also stay away from places that make buying them easy, like the inside of convenience stores.
      Avoidance is key IMHO.

    • bball123h says:

      1. Avoid wearing “retro” basketball jerseys, headbands, sunglasses, wristbands.
      2. Procure some employment.
      3. Avoid secondhand stores.

      You should be cured of your hipster lifestyle in no time!

      • pokinsmot says:

        That was to quit smoking, not quit being a hipster, which I am not in the first place, but I do appreciate your sense of humor!

    • KrispyKrink says:

      I’d say return or destroy the chantix. Friend of mine tried it, he went completely bat shit crazy. Shot his dog, burned down half his house and totaled his car. 3 days after he was off the drug he couldn’t remember doing any of it.

    • ddesigns says:

      Don’t Take the Chantix!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • outshined says:

      Love your handle, don’t quit that. I quit with a combination of wellbutrin and the patch. The patch was disgusting, bad dreams, etc. I’m still on the wellbutrin because as my doctor said at the time, eh, you’re almost 40, you might need it. I smoked here and there after I had “quit” but one time after a “social smoke”, I was so disgusted, that was it for me. (I used to love smoking).

    • JulesNoctambule says:

      Chantix made a friend of mine’s husband go a little loopy, so if you have someone to keep an eye on you in case your moods shift or you hallucinate (both of which happened to him), that might be good. Also, I highly recommend taking up some kind of hobby to keep your hands busy — drawing, writing, knitting, sculpting, anything to fiddle with when the urge to smoke hits you.

    • Angus99 says:

      I kicked a 30 year habit – and over the years, I had tried every damn thing. When I quit, I finally did it cold turkey. I had gotten sick with a bad respiratory infection, and I had a terrible moment one night where I was granted a vision of what my life was going to be like, full time, in another 20 or 30 years. I can only tell you that you reach a point where you will be very glad you did this, and the people who love you will, too. By the way, I never had the side effects for Chantix, but Wellbutrin seemed to work better for me – but at some point, you just have to stop without a substitute. There is no magic, except the magic inside you to get to the sticking point. It’s trite as hell, but nothing works unless you really want to stop. Keep trying, you will get there.

      • RadarOReally has got the Post-Vacation Blues says:

        I’ve never smoked, but my mom, a pack-a-day smoker for more than 30 years, quit cold with Wellbutrin. Her twin sister tried the same approach, it didn’t work for her. I think mindset has a HUGE amount of influence on success. My aunt went into it thinking the pills would do all the work. My mom seemed to go into it knowing it would still be a war. But she’d tried EVERYTHING over the years.

        I can remember when I was a kid, she’d give me her cigarettes and tell me to hide them, to not give them back no matter what she said. The fact that she did that instead of throwing them away NOW tells me she was never going to succeed with that approach. Back then, I just thought it was fun having that kind of power :)

    • stormbird says:

      I’ve heard several people have used the e-cigarette, basically a vaporizer. You control the nicotine so you can back off at your pace, you stop inhaling carcinogens immediately, you’re still doing the oral fixation so you don’t gain weight and, since it’s not smoking, you can legally ‘smoke’ inside. The price for the system varies from model to model but is generally the price of one or two cartons. Again, I don’t smoke, so this is second-hand information. You might want to try it, all the cool kids are doing it.

  8. Paladin_11 says:

    There is only one true Williamsburg, and it isn’t in Brooklyn.

    • healthdog says:

      They have completely captured that colonial hipster spirit! A tip of the tri-cornered hat to Camel.

      • stormbird says:

        “I make my own revolution at home.”

        “My militia is pretty obscure, you’ve probably never heard of it.”

  9. chaesar says:

    “…the temperament of what Williamsburg stands for…”

    so the cigarettes are free ’cause their parents already paid for them?

  10. yessongs says:

    Is the word hipster still used???

  11. JulesNoctambule says:

    Hmm. . .I really do dislike hipsters, but there are no cases of Second-Hand Douchebag poisoning to my knowledge.

  12. stormbird says:

    “brimming with light-hearted angst” reads the ad copy. Wow. I hate that ad more than I hate hipsters. I make my own hate at home, btw.

  13. kobresia says:

    This just in: makers of tobacco products have determined that they have found the temperament of what _________ stands for, and its _______ approach to life, meshes with the ______ brand.

    Who would’ve guessed? If you have lungs, and probably even if you don’t, they think tobacco products are for you!

  14. richcreamerybutter says:

    I live in Williamsburg, and my friends and I would sure like to hear about where to get one of these “trust funds.” I believe these are more prevalent among young Americans in the UES and UWS (and now sadly the LES), and among young Europeans in general.

    • stormbird says:

      Now, now, you’re getting in the way of a meme! Don’t you know the internet is dangerously low on memes?

    • ZekeDMS says:

      I’d suggest finding someone who looks absolutely awful, like their parents dress them in a way to display that they’re “special” children so others aren’t caught off guard, and asking them. Particularly if they’ve got full cases of unwarranted self-importance and Pabst.

  15. TasteyCat says:

    Somebody should tell them the Dodgers own the term Brooklyn.

  16. nutbastard says:

    Lung Cancer rate for lifelong nonsmokers: 1.4%

    Lung Cancer rate for lifelong smokers: ~14%

    Conclusion: Smoking increases your chances of developing lung cancer by 10 times. However, another way of looking at it is lifelong smokers have an 86% chance of NOT developing lung cancer.