Zerger bargarz!
In an encouraging step, Sears has made its merchandise and web shopping experience more accessible to a marginalized population that most retailers ignore: zombies. They’ve even translated the site into Zombian. As they put it, “Zerger bargarz zambah barg!” Yes.
There’s even a gift guide in case you’re wondering what to buy that special zombie in your life for Halloween.
Sears: afterlife. well spent. [Sears (Thanks to everyone who sent this in!)
Zombie Shopper [Twitter]
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It’s been this way for decades. When you want a clerk to check out, you need to have a incense and a ouija board
Unless you want to sign up for a credit card…then you can’t get out the door without getting 5
This is fairly in line with their target demographic.
I’m sorry, but that’s funny, I don’t care how dead you are.
Yeah yeah, Sears sucks, whatever. Their site is really hilarious, though.
Awesome. Way to have a sense of humor, large corporation.
Yeah, I can’t wait until someone comes out calling it irresponsible, terrible and inappropriate. WILL SOMEBODY THINK ABOUT THE CHILDREN?
As much as I can’t stand Sears, I have to agree that they did a great job with that.
Finally they are marketing towards the zombie demographic instead of just hiring them.
I guess they figure no rational human being would shop there. Might as well go after the living dead.
I’m so sick of the whole zombie thing. They’re boring and played out. Can’t anyone think of anything original anymore? No, let’s just throw on a bunch of grey and black face paint, rip some old clothes, and walk around like we have rheumatism. BRRAAAAAIIIIINS, oh my god, you want to eat my brains? How clever and hysterical!
get a sense of humor…the site is funny
Oh no, my opinion is not the same as yours, so obviously I have no sense of humor! I’ll get that checked out right away.
Or maybe it’s the way you express that opinion which makes you seem humourless.
It’s called being hyperbolic. Welcome to the Internet.
Face facts. Obviously there are enough people that enjoy zombies in their media as to justify its continued existence. Guess what, I don’t find kid shows enjoying but the demographic exists to justify their continued existence. How do I handle living in a world with kid shows that are not targeted towards me? I don’t watch them.
So you’ve never complained about something that the general public seems to be absolutely in love with but you yourself can’t stand? Never said “I don’t get the whole iPhone hysteria,” or “that Lady Gaga, she’s completely overrated?” You have much more patience than 99% of the world.
Now, if they had a human “killing” the zombies with a craftsman lawn mower a-la “Dead Alive,” THAT would be freaking HYSTERICAL.
ummm… Dead Alive is a zombie movie, you’re a confusing person.
I can enjoy an old school zombie movie and still think the current “zomg pride and prejudice and zombies and sears and zombies and zombie crawls and [random thing] ONLY WITH ZOMBIES” fad is lame. It’s a classic example of how people get overzealous about something and nearly ruin it via oversaturation.
I agree, but the site is still “funny” nonetheless. The whole zombie thing has been overplayed though…seems like every video game and movie is about zombies.
Zombies are perfect. They’re unthinking murder machines in basically every Western pop-culture setting. They’re indefensible. The definition of evil. Its no wonder people keep going to that well so many times.
Video games involving killing are usually solid sellers. When the killed are actual recognizable people, there is controversy. Usually controversy is good (See GTA series outside of the sex mini game hack debacle).. Medal of Honor caught a shit storm over including the Taliban, hard to prove that it ultimately helped them or hurt them. But regardless, controversy as a marketing technique is dangerous. There are lines that can be crossed that ruin a product for a long time. (See Sinhead O’Connor ripping up a picture of the pope on SNL as a perfect example)
Who’s going to defend zombies from getting digitally murdered? It’s practically perfect, they”re humanoid, so they’re fun to kill in a game, but not actually human.
Plug in any popular supernatural humanoid for “zombie” and you get a similar result, but not quite as effective. Aliens, vampires, even mummies can be “good” – ET, Twilight… shit the cereal that used to be paired up with Count Chocula and Frakenberry… dammit I can’t remember but there have been serious attempts at making mummies not evil.
Originality isn’t profitable until it is proven. Old concepts already have a built-in audience.
Just be glad they didn’t make them brooding emo zombies that sparkle in the sunlight…
I don’t care for sears at all, but that site is great. First time I’ve been to Sears website in years, so I guess it worked in getting a few clicks.
Bravo to sears for this, and for not wimping out…for a large corporation, that’s fairly risky with the amount of gore shown…
Well, I guess this is one way for Sears to get some braiiiiiinnnnsss back into their business.
This ought to please the Zombie Rights Movement.
I expect soon they’ll be a “protected class”, along with drug addicts, alcoholics, Vampires, Werewolves and other allegedly disabled “people” under the Americans With Disabilities Act. They’ll be able to collect SS disability and live off us hardworking taxpaying citizens. And, if they’re dead, how can they be citizens? Wouldn’t that make them ILLEGALS? I mean, they smell bad, they’re dirty and nasty, and they breed like rabbits! I don’t want any of “their kind” living near me.
If a family of their kind moves in down the street, I’m getting out the shotgun!
No need to include Vampires, they are under the addict umbrella.
You’re an anti-Zombite!
If sears whats better business how about this, stop charging twice as much as everyone else.
… AND THEIR ONLINE SHIPPING? Outrageous. “Site to Store” would be a great idea. Too bad they have no ideas.
Bwaa ha ha! This wouldn’t make me go to Sears, but it’s a great Halloween thing.
Y’know what… I hate Sears, but this is classic! I love it – especially the one zombie with mirrored sunglasses on with the reflection of people in the lenses screaming in horror.
That’s just awesome.
Okay, now they need to change their inventory system, their cash registers, product lines and their irritating employees who are trapped in their outdated and frustrating retail model, and I’ll shop there again.
But.. Cool Halloween site morph!
This is what you get when you sell out to a company like K-Mart….!
Who else do they think is going to shop there on Thanksgiving Day…
You’d have to be dead to not find this funny.
Heaven forbid that any gay or interracial couples be featured for Sears ads.