KFC Wants Your Dog To Tinkle On Its New Ads

As we recently reported, KFC (nee Kentucky Fried Chicken) has a bit of an image problem these days. So how does the company want to get its name back in the public consciousness? By advertising where your dog pees.

To promote their Fiery Grilled Wings, KFC has approached a handful of hard-up cities with the idea of exchanging cash for advertising space on the municipalities’ fire hydrants and extinguishers.

KFC proposed the idea to four different locales — Buffalo, NY; San Angelo, TX, Brazil, IN; Cleveland, OH — but only the Indiana town accepted the offer.

However, Buffalo, birthplace of the spicy wing, is having second thoughts about turning down the deal. The city is now considering a compromise. It’s proposing that KFC purchase give Buffalo $2,500 to buy 100 new fire extinguishers, all of which would be emblazoned with the Fiery Wings logo.

Some in the Buffalo city government aren’t too thrilled with the idea.

“We would be endorsing KFC’s wings for what amounts to chicken feed,” said the City Council Finance Committee Chairman.

“There’s the tackiness factor,” adds another Council Member. “You’re promoting a product on safety equipment.”

Fire chief asks Council to OK use of KFC logo in exchange for funds [BuffaloNews.com]

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  1. Alvis says:

    I should hope no dog owners let their pets piss on hydrants IRL – assumed that was a cartoon thing.

    Your pet should be doing its business in your yard and your yard alone. Letting a dog piss on neighbors’ property or in a public park is no less gross and un-neighborly than letting one of your kids do the same.

    • RandomHookup says:

      So what are urban apartment dwellers supposed to do with their dogs?

      • Daverson says:

        Let ‘em piss out the window. We don’t want Alvis stepping in any puddles.

      • Alvis says:

        Get a pet they have the space to care for properly? I understand turtles are lovely.

        • Mighty914 says:

          +1…I can’t stand people who have dogs in my building. I love dogs, but they’re not meant to live in NYC.

          • pecan 3.14159265 says:

            Why don’t you live somewhere that just doesn’t allow dogs in the building if you don’t like the people who have them? Many dogs do just fine in a city and due to the abundance of public park space in NY, have plenty of space to run around.

          • ChuckECheese says:

            I have a friend who moved to Phx from NYC about a year ago. He has two eight-year-old boston terriers who have rarely been outside in their lives. And they hate being outdoors in their new large landscaped yard. When my friend forces them outside, they cower, staring at the sky as if it would fall down on them. It’s hilarious.

            • ellemdee says:

              They’re terrified because it’s an alien environment to them. They’re used to feeling safe in an enclosed environment. This type of behavior is often seen in puppy mill dogs who have lived their entire lives in cages. Some are even scared of grass and don’t understand that they can actually stand on it. The dogs might like a little dog house so they can retreat to an enclosed space if they get overwhelmed but, with patience and reassurance, they should come around in time. Right now, they probably really do think the sky might fall on them.

        • ellemdee says:

          Walking a dog is caring for it properly. Dogs need exercise. Running around in a yard is great, but they need walks, too.

          • Alvis says:

            That means that the community has space for a dog, not the individual owner. If you can’t get by without taking it off your land, you don’t have space for it. This is why you don’t buy horses unless you have acres and acres; just dog owners seem a little less considerate and much more presumptious that the community will pick up the slack of providing their pets places to exercise and shit.

      • pecan 3.14159265 says:

        It’s not just apartment dwellers, it’s everyone who has a dog. Unless you walk your dog in a circle around your own property, you’re going to inevitably have a dog who needs to pee and…what are you going to do? Run the dog back to your own house?

    • sonneillon says:

      If my dog or kid wants to pee on a fire hydrant that is their own prerogative. Although if my dog does it I won’t get a ticket. I’m pretty sure the reverse isn’t true.

      • Warren - aka The Piddler on the Roof says:

        Unless you live in China.

      • ellemdee says:

        And if you walk your unclothed dog around town with a leash and collar, you won’t get in trouble. I’m pretty sure the same isn’t true with kids. Dogs aren’t people, apples to oranges.

      • dangermike says:

        Your dog would get a ticket if you pee on the hydrant? That hardly seems fair. The poor guy doesn’t even have opposable thumbs, let alone the capacity to acquire and sustain employment sufficient to cover the fees associated with civil infractions.

    • pecan 3.14159265 says:

      It’s perfectly normal for dogs to pee on the grass, and it’s pretty much accepted that if a dog needs to go, you find grass, a field, some trees, etc. anywhere but right on the street or near people.

    • jesirose says:

      I live in an apartment complex. The grass at the bottom of my stairs contains a tree and a fire hydrant. You bet your butt my dog pees on that hydrant occasionally. Why does it matter? It’s not going to hurt the fire hydrant. We usually go past that area, but if he needs to pee there, he pees there!

  2. Warren - aka The Piddler on the Roof says:

    Sounds kinky.

  3. montusama says:

    BUFFALO!!!

    Sorry I live in Buffalo, and well it’d probably be fun for the first few times seeing one. it’d probably get annoying.

    • hotdogsunrise says:

      But wouldn’t it be embarrassing for a city known for its wings to have advertisements for such an inferior product?

      Duffs ftw.

  4. Dragon Tiger says:

    I thought the Fiery Grilled Wings were for a limited time only. Maybe we were a test market. I loved those things.

  5. jessjj347 says:

    If Buffalo is advertising on fire hydrants, they better get more money than that.

    Also, I wonder what a firefighter would think about that…

  6. Snarkster says:

    Why not KFC-branded AEDs?

  7. dangermike says:

    The first thing they need to do is fix the quality of what they produce. Their food is terrible, and not just the pile of sadness in the failure bowl. Everything on their menu is terrible in one way or another. They need to revamp the whole thing. Their flagship product, fried chicken, is over salted, greasy, soggy, and limp by the time it reaches the consumer. It is entirely possible to consume the entire portion without ever biting or chewing. It is impossible to consume it without your hands (or utensils, for all you sophisticates out there who don’t know how to eat fried chicken like a civilized person) looking like something you’d find floating by the wreckage of the deepstar horizon.

    Once they fix their fried chicken, they need to do the same with the overly salty but otherwise bland side offerings. The potato wedges are just about the only thing that is completely unpalatble. I haven’t dared tried any of their sandiches since the tender roast grill that I had in 2002 that had an indestructably chewy bit in the meat followed by some sort vesicle that ruptured into a splash of warm salty … presumably water … when I bit into it. In fact, I have only had KFC about 3 times since then.

    Anyway, once the core menu items are fixed, they need to ditch everything else. The sandwiches and wraps are a good idea to compete with burgers. Wings might make sense if they can be done affordably. All the bowls, wraps, other buckets, etc. need to be gone. They only hurt margins.

    Finally, once that’s sorted out, ditch the entire marketing team. I literally thought the S-O-G-double-O-D ads were campbell’s soup until about a week ago. Bring in a new actor to play the colonel. Don’t make him edgy or extreme or fashionable or anything designed to appeal to “urban” or “alternative” markets. Make him young if you want but but a proper identifiable character that does not have a shelf life of 12-18 months like most bits of pop culture. Take him and and let him tell the world that the colonel is back. Show him to be upset at the way his empire has fallen and have him pledge to focus on what the original concept of KFC was about, almost like what we’ve seen with domino’s in the past year or with the return of Jack last decade.

    The brand hasn’t completely lost its vitality yet. It can be saved. It will just require a major haircut and recognition that the past 10-20 years of management have been totally inept.

  8. MarvinMar says:

    Couldn’t they just drop of a bunch of plastic fire hydrants that could be thrown away after the promo?
    How about little key chains of fire extinguishers and hydrants?