(mrbill)
Deep inside, most homeowners despise their homeowners associations for their arbitrary rules and uncanny ability to send out nasty letters for the tiniest violations.
The Week rounds up the silliest rules to which homeowners subject themselves, including:
*Restrictions on how many rose bushes in the front yard.
*Forcing roofs to be constructed with shingles that perfectly match the neighboring homes.
*Disallowing the posting of “for sale” sings.
*Fining pet owners for walking their small dogs through a condo complex lobby rather than carrying them.
Because homeowners sign agreements that let HOAs put liens on their houses if they fail to comply, rule enforcement and appeals can get nasty.
What’s the worst dust-up you ever encountered with an HOA?
Top 7 insane homeowners association rules [The Week]
(Thanks, David!)
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We have a real strict HOA. Gladstone Builders
1. If we wanted to put in landscaping we have to get it approved. This includes planting a tree.
2. No above ground pools.
3. No fences unless it’s around an inground pool.
4. No portable basketball hoops. It has to be cemented in the ground.
5. No sheds.
6. No swings or jungle gyms or any children playground equipment.
7. If you want to put in a patio or deck the designs have to be submited and approved first.
The head of the HOA lives across the street from my mother. The front of his house looks directly into my mother’s backyard (she lives on a very tall and awesome hill).
A few summers ago she decided to let the grass grow because it could only be cut with weed wackers (a LOT of rocks in that back yard) and she felt high grass and wildflowers would be very pretty.
And it was!
Until she got the citation for not mowing her grass. It wouldn’t have been THAT bad, but there were a couple of houses with gravel front yards that had all kinds of weeds growing up. She was pissed that she got called out but they didn’t.
Then she decided to build a shed, but it had to be at least 6 feet from the fence line. So instead she put it on cinderblocks and listed it as temporary. The HOA pres demanded she change it, but the HOA bylaws allowed temporary structures to be built at the fence line so she offered him a cup of coffee and went back to watching the construction of her new shed.
Score one for the HOA haters!
You would be shocked at how many HOAs forbid overnight parking in your own driveway. Luckily this rule is largely unenforceable. There are 20 houses on my street and only two of them don’t have cars in their driveway any given night.
That’s crazy. Everyone in my neighborhood parks in the driveway, because the garages are all too small for anything but a coupe.
Although parking in the driveway probably IS illegal in my neighborhood. I hate our HOA.
In my neighborhood we aren’t even allowed to mow our lawns with a motorized lawn mower on Sundays!! (This is not a joke)
Where we used to live, Kingwood Glen, in Humble, TX:
1. No lawn was to be mowed below 1.5″ or above 3″.
2. Edging the lawn was to be between 1″-2″ from curbs and driveways.
Each week the yard Nazis would patrol the ‘hood and measure suspect yards. Of course, we got a letter informing of our egregious violation of the hallowed mowing code (unacceptable edging). I returned the letter with pictures of the fenced back yards of HOA board members — fences that had been illegally extended into the access ways; back yards the members weren’t paying property taxes to enjoy. There were no more letters.
I would deal with any HOA I could, if I could live in the equivalent of a 55+ community for people in their thirties. No kids! No teens! GLORY. I would paint my house whatever color they wanted, trim my yard to the exact quarter of an inch, if in return, I had a swimming pool that I could actually use without being surrounded by screaming children and surly teenagers.
Never have, never will because I’ll shoot myself before living some where with an HOA.
It should be ‘Disallowing the posting of “for sale” signs.’ #corrections
Loving all the “Socialist!” calling. OK, people, here’s the short form:
Socialism is a system by which the STATE owns and controls every aspect of the means of production.
It is not, as some think, any attempt at getting in the way of Robber Baron worshiping capitalists and their lassiez fiaire at any expense attitude. HOA’s are ridiculous, but that doesn’t make them Socialist. Also, the President is totally NOT a Socialist. End of story.
Protip – if you don’t like HOA’s, don’t move to a neighborhood that has one. No one is forcing you to. You don’t suddenly have the right to not abide by the rules simply because you don’t like them. DON’T MOVE THERE IF YOU DON’T LIKE THE RULES.
We used to live in a community with an HOA. Never ever again! We have been ticketed for having our garage door open “too long”, 1 foot of garden hose visible on the ground, neighbor’s toys near our yard, an oil spot we never noticed on our driveway and they made us remove a tree that wasn’t “growing properly”. I almost forgot the 3 weeds that I missed and the backyard inspections twice a year.
People are leaving HOA’s like crazy here and there is a huge class action lawsuit started. There is nothing wrong with keeping a community comfortable and nice for everyone to live in but these guys go just way too far.
The worst I heard was an acquaintance here in Charleston. They got fined for having boxes on their front lawn…the day they were moving in. (And no, that didn’t make any difference to the HOA, no boxes on the lawn meant no boxes on the lawn. Ever.)
We got a notice for having our garage door open, when the kids were riding bikes. Garages can only be open if a vehicle is in the process of ingress or egress and bikes don’t count as vehicles.
Home improvement be darned.
How is this even legal?
I had a friend living in a condo and was having a hard time with the association over replacing linoleum in his kitchen with tile (yes inside his condo). He then showed me the condo “rules” and then pointed out that few new rules had been created until about 2 years ago when they got a new association president. In the past couple of years there are about 20 new rules created not as general rules, but specifically to target certain people the president didn’t get along with or like. There was one about having all panels of your vehicle the same color and style. Apparently that one was created after a neighbor the president didn’t like had been in a car accident and didn’t have the money to properly replace his damaged car door so he bought a same make/model door from a junk yard and put it on his car. His car was black, but the door was green. Another one was about specifically not parking boats on trailers at the end of the lot where people had been for decades. Now the association president stores his RV and 4 wheelers there. Guess it’s okay since they’re not boats.
Ours won’t let us redo the stairs in the back of our house because they don’t understand the plan. We said we’d build a handrail in the STYLE of the old one and they said they didn’t see how we could reuse the handrail – which we said we weren’t doing. Even pictures couldn’t get them to understand. Right now it’s falling apart and looks awful.
A HOA story: http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/thu-april-20-2006/not-in-your-front-yard
Fining pet owners for walking their small dogs through a condo complex lobby rather than carrying them.
Not that crazy of a law considering my neighbour’s uncontrollable dog, who already has a favorite spot to pee on.
What about the one where Vampires and Werewolves are forced to get along and can’t even eat the humans that live there? I mean, how can we be cordial if we can’t even share a meal?
Well, before moving out of the prison that was an HOA controlled-neighborhood, I put one over on them, albeit in a small way.
All of the houses, even those with decks, had a small concrete pad (The HOA called it a patio. It was about 2 feet square) just outside of the back door. In our case, it was at the base of the steps from the ground level to the deck. The HOA declared that no-one was permitted to install a brick patio, so I didn’t. I just made the concrete pad look like one. Stencils and patio paint and a rough sponge did a rather impressive job.
I got a nastygram from the HOA. They didn’t even have the courage to address it to me specifically, just to ‘all residents’. Hubby and I gleefully ignored the letter. Found out later that one of our neighbornazis had seen me working on the concrete, and couldn’t tell the difference between a thin plastic stencil and big hefty bricks. Especially not from 5 feet away on his own deck.
Not too long after, we sold the place, so it’s the new owner’s responsibility now. Heh. After what the new owner pulled on us at closing, she deserves the hassle.
Would you pay someone to spy on you? To put a lien on your house? To have to ask them permission to do anything you want to your house? That’s what these people are doing.
This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.
In my neighborhood, a home recently was struck by lightening, and sustained substantial fire damage as a result. Their insurance company got to work (slowly, I might add). The residents of the home were not permitted on the property without permission by the insurance company, and were advised to just stay at their temporary lodging until the work was done. They did just that… and got a lien placed on their home because they didn’t mow their grass!
These people lost just about everything they own, and now the HOA has a lien because of the grass!
Worst one I’ve ever come across? My wife’s co-worker was president of his HOA and was telling her of a condo user that had gone out of town and had friends come over and turn on their porch light for them. This got left on during the day, which was a violation. The HOA fined the condo owners AND the neighbors who had turned on the porch light, since they were members as well…
Wouldnt live with a HOA EVER
In Garden City, Idaho, the HOA president has stated that monthly Board of Directors meetings are for discussion only from the Board of Directors. No homeowner input is accepted or permitted. Homeowners are permitted in the room, but when the meeting begins; you better be quiet.
In fact, at the Homeowners meeting last year, he stated that the owners wer permitted to talk ONLY because it was the homeowners meeting.
I had new carpet installed in my condo. The contractor took most of the old stuff away but tossed some of it in the bulk trash dumpster. Someone saw him (the HOA offered a $200 bounty if residents could nail whichever non-resident was dumping their crap in our dumpsters) and got the phone number on the side of the truck. They called him and said that either he paid a $200 fine or they would sign some sort of criminal complaint for illegal dumping. I went to the next board meeting and explained that it was my carpeting and, therefore, could be dumped. They said it was his once he removed it and besides, they had already paid the bounty. I explained what they were doing fit the definition of extortion to the “t” and that I should know – I work for the County Prosecutor’s Office. They stood by their guns at the meeting but neither I nor the contractor ever heard anything again. Well intentioned, I guess, but afraid to admit their mistake.
One thing we have heard from a lot of customers (we sell the MailBoss locking mailboxes) is that their HOA has strict restrictions on mailboxes. Even if they want to buy a locking mailbox… specifically, ours… so they don’t have to worry about getting their mail promptly or having their identity stolen due to mail theft… they are prohibited from buying a mailbox that is not in accordance with the HOA. They have to petition the HOA board to get everyone on board. This makes me wonder if the HOA would be liable at all if a homeowner who was prohibited from getting a secure mailbox became a victim of (expensive) ID theft due to stolen mail. Anyone know?
http://www.edgewaterisle.com
I used to work for an answering service about 15 years ago. One of our accounts was an uppity-yuppity HOA office in a Seattle suburb and we used to get all kinds of bizarre calls from the homeowners asking us to page security for them – we didn’t have a choice – if they called, we had to page it. The homeowners paid a monthly fee for the privilege of living in the exclusive gated community and believed that no request was too outrageous.
One lady told me she wanted the security guard to come shoo away a cat that was meowing on her front porch – being a helpful problem solving kind of gal, I asked if she had tried to shoo it away herself (hey, maybe it was a persistent cat) or if she had maybe waved a broom at it or something. Her answer? – “I’m on the 2nd floor in my bedroom – I don’t want to go downstairs right now.” So I paged security for her.
Another memorable call was from a man who wanted to the guard paged to come take a report because someone’s dog had crapped on his lawn. He said he had an idea who’s dog it was but wanted the guard to witness it and verify it so he could file a formal complaint. I remember thinking “Is the guard supposed to be some sort of dog shit profiler? Do you think he can look at it, maybe smell it, then say “Yep, you’re right sir – this is definitely from the Beagle across the street – not the Doberman on the corner.” ” Yep – I paged security for this one too – the guard was not amused.
However, the most disturbing call I ever received was from a homeowner who wanted security to come patrol his area and check out a couple of teens who were walking down the street. The reason the homeowner gave – “They don’t look like they are from around here if you know what I mean.” When I said no, I didn’t know what he meant and asked if he could give me a general description so the guard would know what to look for he said “Let’s just say I haven’t seen other people who look like them in the neighborhood – they look like they don’t belong around here.” Of course, I had to page the guard – but I told the homeowner he would have to explain his reasoning to the guard himself. Can I say with 100% certainty this was a race issue? No, I can’t. But even 15 years later this call still resonates with me.
my parents live on an acreage with neighbors and I know one of their Indian neighbors tends to have broken down vehicles and other craps around their house making it look like it’s inhabited by animals. I still can’t believe those people can afford a $500k house but can’t afford to clean up around it. So a HOA would be useful in their neighborhood but a city bylaw could also result in them getting a fine but that would involve snitching.
the only dust up i had with my condo association dealt with the towing company our original property management hired, they were towing cars that were parked in odd shaped spots that were not marked as no parking. no one was ever towed before they were hired.
It may be of interest from an environmental and legal perspective but also an issue with HOAs that give credence to the adage that power corrupts. In Beaufort, SC the County Administrator enacted a policy of delegating authority and enforcement of the County’s tree removal ordinance to HOAs. Codes enforcement has stated that HOAs to whom the ordinance authority has been delegated by the County Administrator are “exempt” from the ordinance and County enforcement. This is all occurring in an area of a fragile ecosystem, waterways becoming polluted and oyster beds being closed to harvesting as well as an area in much need of its native trees in the south for the many benefits trees provide (i.e., energy conservation, stormwater management, increased property value, etc.) It has created a slippery slope and outsourced the public trust.
An Attorney General opinion was sought and in a five page document citing case law and analysis, the conclusion was that “in accordance with our prior opinions, we are of the opinion that governmental entities are precluded from delegating their police powers to individuals or private entities. We believe that enforcement of a County zoning ordinance involves the exercise of the County’s police powers. Accordingly, we would advise hat the County is precluded from delegating its authority to enforce its ordinances to an individual or private entity, such as a homeowner’s association.” For full opinion see – http://www.scattorneygeneral.org/opinions/pdf/2010/erickson%20s%20s%20os-9089%20b%208-4-10%20beaufort%20county%20tree%20removal%20ordinance.PDF
See newspaper editorial link below. At this writing, the County refuses to rescind its policy.
http://www.lowcountrynewspapers.net/archive/2010/10/28/story/county-should-enfore-its-own-tree-ordinance
This is why you should never buy in an HOA. In an HOA you only lease your home.
Bad HOAs are the result of bad neighbors. We inherited an 11th floor luxury beach condo, and hired crews to renovate. An HOA rule was that all workers had to be out of the building by 5 pm and no work was allowed on Saturday, Sunday, or holidays.
OK, we could meet that.
But across the hall was a neighbor outraged that we were doing this work. Things went out, things came in, people came and went, and each thing annoyed him. He complained to the super nearly every day, but there were no violations to see, hear, smell, or taste.
Then came the day the built-in kitchen dinette was removed. Big job took much of the day and wore the crew out. It was clear that we would not be through by 5 pm. We’d need a few minutes more.
At 4:58 as usual, the neighbor was standing in the hall looking at his watch. 8′ of broken dinette rested against one wall. The carpeting was covered with dust and crud. All 4 workers and me were still at work.
The neighbor trotted off toward the tenant elevator, obviously fetching the super so he could turn us in for violations. Oh happy day!
As the elevator door closed behind him, I called to the guys and said we had 3 minutes to empty the hall, vacuum the carpeting, and them to be out of sight in the freight elevator.
They grabbed the dinette and had it and themselves inside the elevator within 2 minutes. By then I had the carpet vacuumed. The area around my door was an island of spotless.
I stepped inside out of sight when the neighbor and the super came into the hall. He was carrying on and on about the mess his hallway was in, evidently not looking.
“What the hell are you talking about?” the super shouted. “Where are the violations?” He went back downstairs and so far as we know, ignored anything this neighbor had to say ever after.
I suppose we could have taken advantage of this “boy who cried wolf” neighbor but never did. What we did do was give our unit the best weather-stripped doorway in the building so we could smoke without bothering others on the 11th floor.
This neighbor refused to use weatherstripping at all, even when we gave him some. He preferred complaining endlessly about smoke blowing in around the door, which we knew was from the Rumanian down the hall.
But rather than be wrongly blamed, for our last months there we smoked with our double doors wide open across from his. And sold the place to a family of smokers.
Bad HOAs are the result of bad neighbors. We inherited an 11th floor luxury beach condo, and hired crews to renovate. An HOA rule was that all workers had to be out of the building by 5 pm and no work was allowed on Saturday, Sunday, or holidays.
OK, we could meet that.
But across the hall was a neighbor outraged that we were doing this work. Things went out, things came in, people came and went, and each thing annoyed him. He complained to the super nearly every day, but there were no violations to see, hear, smell, or taste.
Then came the day the built-in kitchen dinette was removed. Big job took much of the day and wore the crew out. It was clear that we would not be through by 5 pm. We’d need a few minutes more.
At 4:58 as usual, the neighbor was standing in the hall looking at his watch. 8′ of broken dinette rested against one wall. The carpeting was covered with dust and crud. All 4 workers and me were still at work.
The neighbor trotted off toward the tenant elevator, obviously fetching the super so he could turn us in for violations. Oh happy day!
As the elevator door closed behind him, I called to the guys and said we had 3 minutes to empty the hall, vacuum the carpeting, and them to be out of sight in the freight elevator.
They grabbed the dinette and had it and themselves inside the elevator within 2 minutes. By then I had the carpet vacuumed. The area around my door was an island of spotless.
I stepped inside out of sight when the neighbor and the super came into the hall. He was carrying on and on about the mess his hallway was in, evidently not looking.
“What the hell are you talking about?” the super shouted. “Where are the violations?” He went back downstairs and so far as we know, ignored anything this neighbor had to say ever after.
I suppose we could have taken advantage of this “boy who cried wolf” neighbor but never did. What we did do was give our unit the best weather-stripped doorway in the building so we could smoke without bothering others on the 11th floor.
This neighbor refused to use weatherstripping at all, even when we gave him some. He preferred complaining endlessly about smoke blowing in around the door, which we knew was from the Rumanian down the hall.
But rather than be wrongly blamed, for our last months there we smoked with our double doors wide open across from his. And sold the place to a family of smokers.