Like Pizza? Maybe You Should Work For The TSA

One would think that in these tough economic times, placing a help-wanted ad in the paper or online would be sufficient for netting employers a pile of resumes. But the Transportation Safety Administration has decided to target a very specific demographic in the Washington, D.C., area — pizza eaters.

The ad, touting a “career where x-ray vision and federal benefits come standard,” is for TSA security officers at Washington-Dulles International and Reagan National Airports and is apparently popping up on pizza boxes around our nation’s capital.

Do you think this is an effective or embarrassing method of reaching potential hires?

More photos are available over at the site for Federal News Radio.

Photos : DHS delivers job offers on pizza boxes [Federal News Radio]

Comments

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  1. Bakergirl says:

    It’s sweet gig, if you can the extensive pass the application process.

    • bendee says:

      Just make sure you don’t accidentally the whole thing.

      • Sexual Elf! says:

        Ha, you guys: ‘It’s sweet gig, if you can the extensive pass the application process.’…’So TSA Security Theater the application process too the same as airports?’…’Just make sure you don’t accidentally the whole thing.’

        Huh?? :)

    • the Persistent Sound of Sensationalism says:

      So TSA Security Theater the application process too the same as airports?

    • Starrion says:

      Let’s see:
      Pulse: Check
      Breathing: Check
      Final test: Give the applicate a form in triplicate. Tell them to fill it out, detach the second and third sheet, hand it the white copy, and shred the other two. If the applicant asks why we are using a three part form, terminate the test. We need people who can follow orders without thinking about it.

  2. RandomHookup says:

    I’m in the recruiting business and this isn’t a bad way to go. Assuming they have done their homework about the demographics of who they usually hire, seems like a good approach. They should have set up a shorter, specific URL so they can measure how effective the campaign is.

  3. Applekid ┬──┬ ノ( ゜-゜ノ) says:

    I look forward to our new Ninja Turtle TSA Agents.

  4. YouDidWhatNow? says:

    They should have listed the qualifications that are needed to effectively be a TSA officer:

    “Can you successfully utter the sound *derp* a few times a day? You’re hired!”

  5. GuyGuidoEyesSteveDaveâ„¢ says:

    Well, not only are they supporting local businesses, they are reaching out to people who may not be checking the newspaper for help wanted ads because they may be otherwise unhappily employed, or for other reasons.

    I am all for this.

    • dreamfish says:

      Why does gitemstevedave insist on viewing the positive benefits of a novel method of job advertising, instead of taking the opportunity to just make fun of the TSA?

    • JamieSueAustin says:

      Or because the help ads are full of scams. I haven’t seen a real job in the paper forever.

  6. Doubts42 says:

    Sounds like a good job. can anyone tell me if the lobotomies are mandatory or just encouraged?

  7. sumocat says:

    What’s embarrassing about it? Everyone eats pizza. Rich, poor, black, white, Hispanic, Asian, male, female. It’s a broad and undiscriminating way to advertise… except for vegans. Wait, is the TSA saying vegans can’t keep our skies safe? I’m filing a lawsuit!

    • JediJohn82 says:

      You could order a veggie pizza hold the pizza

      • the Persistent Sound of Sensationalism says:

        The percentage of vegans that would order pizza is very small. Can’t eat cheese and there can’t be any animal fat in the dough or sauce, etc, blah, blah.

  8. SJ says:

    I always assumed TSA pulled from Wallmart greeters who couldn’t make the cut.

  9. oldtaku says:

    It seems like a good way to go given their target market. Perhaps on cans of paint and other huffables?

  10. thaJack says:

    Because if you have the skills to order a pizza, you’re already more than qualified to be a TSO.

  11. indiecognition says:

    I live in DC, and a couple weeks ago I was shopping at a bodega when a TSA agent in uniform comes in, asks the cashier for a bag of K2 (synthetic marijuana stuff)…she hands it to him and says it’s $12…he argues that he doesn’t trust the price since it doesn’t say anywhere and then just walks out and steals the K2 right in front of her. It was appalling, and I would’ve chased him out but there was a bunch of thuggish guys with him outside, and I figured I’d probably have gotten tazed then mugged.

    Cream of the crop they hire at TSA…it’s a good thing they don’t have any important responsibilities or judgment calls to make!

    • Starrion says:

      Usually they confine the stealing to people’s luggage. It sounds like that one thinks he can get away with it anywhere.

  12. AllanG54 says:

    Knew a guy who worked for the TSA. He’s no brighter than Gump and even he ended up leaving after a year or so. Now he’s a security guard at the Staten Island Ferry Terminal. Don’t know if it’s a step up or not but I sure don’t feel any safer knowing he’s on the job.

  13. dolemite says:

    Seems like a strange topic for a pizza box, but advertising on pizza boxes in general seems like a good idea to me.

  14. kubus_gt says:

    I remember when Court TV (yeah that long ago) delivered their quarterly reports to Agencies this way. Tag line on the pizza box was “We Deliver!”
    Back to the topic. Why is that TSA spends extra money for this when they have a perfectly good website and a perfectly healthy relation with any job placement outfit in the country?

    • RandomHookup says:

      Hiring TSA agents, especially around Dulles, has been difficult in the past. Give them credit for trying something different.

  15. dg says:

    Demographic discussions aside, I just want to eat my damn pizza without seeing any advertising or want ads or missing child crap. If it’s got the name of the company on it – fine. +2 if you just have the generic “Hot Pizza” with the pic of italy on the box and no name at all…

    I’m just suffering from advertising overload… Ads don’t need to be everywhere, nor should they be.

  16. satoru says:

    I think it’s an interesting money maker for the pizza place. If you think about it, once you’ve ordered the pizza, advertising for the pizza place on the box is somewhat moot. Why not use that space for advertising revenue instead. You’re guaranteed that people are going to see the ad no matter what, so it’s compelling when you try to sell the ad space. Similar to the pre-movie ads where you have a captive audience looking at a giant screen.

    Certainly pizza places have razor thin margins, so any additional revenue they can generate is good for them. Whether they get any backlash from customers will ultimately determine if they continue to do so.

  17. nbs2 says:

    As asked elsewhere – is it the eaters or the delivery guys that are being recruited?

  18. Loias supports harsher punishments against corporations says:

    Seems they are targeting exactly the people they typically hire. In no way a compliment there, but at least they are being consistent with their shitty business model.

  19. MuffinSangria says:

    Where can we get a list of places that are using these boxes?

  20. agtwork says:

    I applied to the TSA back in April, and I’m only half way through the application process.

    I called the TSA help line this morning to find out what the delay is…

    The medical testing service they TSA uses to do their paperwork is backed up with all the new applicants they have coming through. If you do apply, expect a 7-10 week wait to pass just the medical portion of the application.

    • ITDEFX says:

      Hey, I really feel your pain. My pain is much worse. Long story but here goes.

      I applied for Regan back in summer of 2008. Heard nothing…got a job teaching for a school and was under contract. I get an email in November to come in and do the computer tests, pass those (got an email confirming that). Then I am forced to play phone tag with one of their officers for the next two weeks because I get called while I am teaching class and can’t answer it. Called during break and left messages, but he would always call back when I am in session. Finally got a hold of him and got bitched at for not answering my phone, dispite the fact that I told him repeatedly that I am teaching classes. He asks me if I wanted to continue, I said yes…he gives me the whole scripted shabang about the hours and I told him that I can only do this weekends only due to the fact that I am under contract with that school and can’t leave for a part time job. He disqualifies me for the position and tells me my test scores are good for 2 years and my application is good for one year. Of course I am going to find something else if I don’t hear from them within a month.

      Fast forward to a few months later, I am interested in reapplying at a closer airport. Called the help desk and guess what? They can’t find my file or any of my test results. They said they would look for the paper back ups but months later they couldn’t find shit. I kept on getting excuses and ultimately being the lazy asses they are they forced me to reapply and redo my tests even though I had confirmation emails from them that I passed all their tests.

      So I do the entire shit again and pass the tests and wait…and wait… gave help desk so many calls to see whats going on then they finally give me that e86 form to fill out and man that’s nuts…as they want to examine the last 10 years of my life. I get my form rejected several times because of stupid things like they need to know my in-law’s names and addresses for my gf whom I am living with but not married (I had to call and correct them because they realized who ever looked at it thought living with someone means your married).. and other stupid shit like telling me my parents cannot have dual citizen ship even though both the US and that country allows for it. Finally after not hearing anything for months, I get a call while on vacation to do the airport assessment. 7 months after I started my application!!!! I passed there assessment, got finger printed and id’ed and was told to schedule the medical exam. I did that, passed that back in mid May.

      Kept on checking my dashboard, still said I hadn’t done my medical check, even though I did. called there medical records center, and was told that they won’t look at my file until after july 4th!!! then it might be another 2 or 3 weeks AFTER that before they ok it..even though my doc oked it at the time of exam.

      To top it off, they have NOT STARTED my background check at all!!!

      Typical wait times to get a hold of someone at the help desk is a minimum of an hour!! The longest wait til was 2 hours! No matter what time you call it’s always an hour to wait for them to tell you nothing can be done!

      Now they are telling me that if my e86 has been sent back more than 3 times for clarification, I may be automatically disqualified from being hired. 95% of the time I get a sent back is because the idiot on the other end didn’t proofread my answers and made assumptions.

      Based on what I saw my ex went thru, she applied in January and got hired by April of that year.

      This is by far the worse application process I have ever been thru.

  21. HogwartsProfessor says:

    The only ads I’ve seen on pizza boxes around here are for the pizza place.

  22. jeffjohnvol says:

    I’m in favor of this if they limit the ads to pizza’s with pork toppings. Or would that be profiling?

  23. CareerDiva.net says:

    With a 9 percent unemployment rate in this country you would think the TSA is flooded with resumes. Could it be that job seekers heard conditions for such jobs aren’t great. Maybe if TSA workers had collective bargaining rights the agency would be able to put the pizza-box recruitment campaign back in the oven.

    • BurtReynolds says:

      I think they generally do have plenty of applicants. The problem is the DC area has relatively low unemployment and the pay wouldn’t even get a studio apt near DCA or IAD.

  24. common_sense84 says:

    It sounds like they have an advertising budget they don’t even need.

  25. jp7570-2 says:

    This explains SO much.

  26. SunnyLea says:

    “But the Transportation Safety Administration has decided to target a very specific demographic in the Washington, D.C., area — pizza eaters.”

    Well, while it is a specific demographic, I’d hardly say it was “very” specific. I’d be willing to be a broad cross-section of people order pizza, wouldn’t you?

  27. cmdr.sass says:

    Couldn’t they just round up a couple of guys down at the local homeless shelter?

  28. Conformist138 says:

    So, in order to get employees who will be professionals, the kind of people not likely to make remarks about someone’s genitalia, TSA makes a joke about x-ray vision on a pizza box? I have no issue with using pizza boxes to get the word out about hiring opportunities. I don’t even mind TSA doing it. However, airport security should be something that is effective and not seen as a total joke. If the TSA wasn’t already looking like a group of poorly trained monkeys, perhaps this approach could be seen as new and interesting. As it stands, it looks really poorly thought out.

  29. Bob says:

    Actually it makes some sort of sense. Given the awesome mandated task given to TSA by Congress, with the highest expectations from this esteemed group; then given that the going salary for new TSA workers, which I personally think does not fit Congress’ high expectations; job ads on a Pizza box might be a more cost effective than the traditional routes of advertising for employment. It is certainly astonishing out-of-the-box thinking from the government. If we could bottle up that thought process and apply it to other Federal Departments we might come up with some solutions to our governmental problems that will be in the category of “this crazy idea might just work” realm.

  30. Coyote says:

    Ok really late reply, but I have to say something.

    People that even look in the classifieds let alone need a pizza box to tell them were to work don’t need to be working national security. These jobs are to be responsible for the lives of dozens if not 100’s of people. TSA agents should represent the same level of security we would expect from police officers and other “approved” security personnel. In fact since this is a govt. job that often requires international cooperation they should be required to have service experience. A few weeks in bootcamp alone would weed out 99% of the jackholes that are making a farce of this whole situation.

  31. Coyote says:

    Ok really late reply, but I have to say something.

    People that even look in the classifieds let alone need a pizza box to tell them were to work don’t need to be working national security. These jobs are to be responsible for the lives of dozens if not 100’s of people. TSA agents should represent the same level of security we would expect from police officers and other “approved” security personnel. In fact since this is a govt. job that often requires international cooperation they should be required to have service experience. A few weeks in bootcamp alone would weed out 99% of the jackholes that are making a farce of this whole situation.