KFC Hates Vuvuzelas Too; Will Give You A Free Doublicious For Yours

Were you one of the few people on this continent to get caught up in the World Cup hullaballoo? Did you get drunk enough to think that buying a vuvuzela — the obnoxiously loud plastic horn that has been the bane of many Cup watchers — would be a good idea? If so, the fried chicken-loving folks at KFC might be willing to exchange your noisemakers for one of their bellyachers.

In a letter written to “U.S. Resident Vuvuzela Owners,” KFC’s CEO details the fast food chain’s offer:

We hear you, LOUD and clear. With the trumpeting of America’s vuvuzelas beginning to fade, KFC is proud to announce an open offer that will provide “Doublicious” satisfaction for soccer fans’ ears and America’s stomachs.

KFC’s new Vuvuzela Exchange Program offers heartbroken soccer fans a free taste of the Colonel’s famous comfort food in exchange for their recently silenced plastic horns.

The Vuvuzela Exchange Program is simple — the first 500 U.S. residents who mail their vuvuzelas to KFC Headquarters by July 15, 2010 will receive a KFC gift check to try our new Doublicious sandwich in return…

We hope vuvuzela owners from coast to coast take us up on our offer to trade in their noisemakers for a taste of our new signature sandwich. That would produce the kind of buzz that’s easy on the ears and the taste buds.

Reading the fine print, it appears those who take part will receive a generic $5 KFC gift card, which would not require you to get a Doublicious, which if you forget is basically the Double Down minus one chicken breast and on a bun.

If you have an extra vuvuzela sitting around and can somehow get it to KFC HQ by July 15 for less than $5 in shipping, here’s the address:

KFC Corporate Headquarters
Attention: Vuvuzela Exchange Program
1900 Colonel Sanders Lane
Louisville, KY 40213

KFC SWAPS VUVUZELAS FOR A FREE DOUBLICIOUS [Press release]

Comments

Edit Your Comment

  1. BigHeadEd says:

    And those who aren’t among the first 500 to mail in their vuvuzela, while not receiving a KFC gift check to try our new Doublicious sandwich in return, will receive the unspoken thanks of a grateful nation.

    • mythago says:

      The thanks are not “unspoken” in the least. It’s just that everybody is too deaf from those damned vuvuzelas to hear them.

  2. El_Fez says:

    Heartbroken? Bah! It’s been an AWESOME World Cup even tho the US was eliminated early! And really, who thought America had a snowball’s chance anyway?

  3. Cyniconvention says:

    You can buy Vuvuzelas in America? /stupid question. I want one…

  4. Hirayuki says:

    I can’t believe I’ve made it this far without having heard a vuvuzela in any way, shape, or form. I am, however, immensely grateful.

  5. Erich says:

    They can have my vuvuzela when they pry it from my cold dead hands!

  6. dreamfish says:

    The noise of vuvuzelas in the background to football games has never bothered me. Either I subconsciously filter out the sound or subconsciously actually like it.

  7. Back to waiting, but I did get a cute dragon ear cuff says:

    Pure, unadulterated PR move on KFC’s part. Not that I have anything against pure, unadulterated PR moves.

    Never held one, but I assume they weigh between 8 ounces and pound. Shipping is probably $4.80, $4.90 if you walk into a post office. Add the cost of a label and schlepping, and you have lost money.

  8. TheGreySpectre says:

    Seems like you lose money on shipping for this “free meal”

  9. mythago says:

    And after you turn in your vuvuzela(s), remember that you can STILL enjoy (?) the sound of vuvuzelas online:

    http://www.vuvuzela.fm/

  10. savethecirclepit says:

    You will never be able to ship this for under five bucks. So just take your vuvuzela to the KFC, use the money it would have cost to ship it, eat your food and play some sweet tunes for the other KFC diners to enjoy. Oh yea and don’t forget to bring a friend along to shoot video of the other patrons reactions.

  11. FrugalFreak says:

    anyone know where you can buy mini VuVus?

    • Applekid ┬──┬ ノ( ã‚œ-゜ノ) says:

      In my day, we called them Kazoos.

  12. RandomHookup says:

    I loved the name vuvuzelas once I heard about them during last year’s Confederation Cup. The fact that the US beat Spain 2-0 and was ahead of Brazil 2-0 at half before a 3-2 loss made me especially fond of the buzz.

  13. infamousjre says:

    What the heck makes a Doublicious in any way “double”?