There’s a pretty heated debate a-brewin’ on the normally tame pages of Dear Abby’s advice column this week about when — if ever — is it okay for someone without a disability to use the restroom stalls constructed for use by the disabled?
Looks like Abby had previously advised a reader of larger size that it was okay for her to use the handicap stall because she had difficulty getting situated in the smaller stalls. Since then, the longtime advice columnist has gotten plenty of feedback from both sides of the argument.
There are those who claim that, like handicap parking spots at stores and offices, these stalls are reserved for those who need them most.
Then the opposite side of the argument goes that these stalls are for everyone’s use and that they exist to accommodate those who need them.
Surely our readers have just as many varied and well-reasoned opinions as the old biddies (like me) who read Dear Abby?
Dear Abby: Are restrooms for disabled for use only by the disabled?
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I think it’s perfectly acceptable to use a handicap bathroom stall if there isn’t a handicapped person waiting to use it. Why should I have to stand around and possibly wet myself because I waited too long after drinking a large soda? If the stall is there, available, and no one handicapped needs to use it, then I’ll happily hop in there.
The handicapped stall is often where an establishment puts the changing table for small children. It’s also the only stall that will accommodate a parent with a small child who still needs help on the potty; It’s ok to use, even if neither one of them are handicapped.
I like holding onto the side bars, kick my legs back and do dips while I pee. Much more fun than just standing there. So I always make it a point to use the monkey bars stall.
They’re handicap-accessible, not handicap-only.
If you are in a wheelchair and there is a line… you get to be next.
Establishments are required to have handicapped accessible restroom so that a disabled person can use the facilities. They are not required to provide greater access only equal access. If there is a line the disabled person needs to find the end of it and wait like everyone else. My oldest and dearest friend (RIP) was wheelchair bound, and he openly despised any special treatment. Treat a handicapped person just like any other person you might encounter. If you are a rude dbag to everyone else, then be a rude dbag to the handicapped as well. Oh yeah, grow up you rude dbag:)
The stalls with extra space and SAFETY GRIP BARS are indeed intended for use by the handicapped and disabled who can be totally unable to use the other stalls, but sadly their use is not protected by law as the parking spots are.
Being handicapped, I do find it annoying when I need to use the only stall I can in a restroom, it is the only stall occupied, most often by an able bodied person who has no need for the extra features placed in that stall for our use.
I with those stalls were protected by law for our exclusive use – or that ALL stalls were created as handicapped usable stalls…
or that ALL stalls were created as handicapped usable stalls…
I find the height of the toilet in handicapped stalls problematic. The regular stalls are more comfortable for me, assuming the regular stalls aren’t tiny. (And I’ve seen some TINY stalls: ones small enough to give people who aren’t fat at all trouble, small enough that the tissue actually has to be located above your head for there to be room for it.)
i like the big stall bc touching the walls of other stalls by accident creeps me out. i don’t take so long that a handicapped person would be in dire need.
I figure it this way, there are buildings which the main doorways (that both disabled and abled people can walk/wheel through) but there’s no debate on if we can use those. Handicap restrooms (stalls) are the same, it’s just handicap accessible. Movie theaters have handicap accessible seats, you’re free to sit in them, but the theaters usually have a policy that if you’re sitting in it and a handicap person needs to use it then you must move to a different seat, which there WILL be one. Anyways personally I don’t care, even though I’m not handicap but if I were I probably still wouldn’t.
This has been going on her column since her mother was writing it. And no, the stall is accessible, not reserved. Too often I have seen a case of entitlement with handicapped people.
I have even been yelled at because the restaurant I worked in did not have handicapped stalls in the bathrooms. The building was over forty years old and exempt from the ADA because it was a privately owned structure built before 1973. The woman refused to accept that were exemptions in the ADA and vowed to have us shut downed and fined out of existence, despite us having a valid occupancy certificate that stated exempt on it.
I would have loved to seen her face when the building inspector explained that are exemptions in the ADA for private businesses. Sometimes the Republicans do get things right…
I am a mom of two little ones and I have to use the larger stall when I have both kids with me and/or the stroller. My choice would be to leave my children unsupervised. I always offer it if there is someone who needs it more than me. And I have never witnessed anyone who did not defer to those individuals.
Also, the last time this was addressed the person who wrote in expected the right to use the handicapped stall when ever she wanted. My issue is that these stalls are designed to be accessed by the handicapped and not reserved for them.
In the first series of letters under the original Abby, the handicapped woman expected others to move out of the way so she could have exclusive access to the HP stall, despite their being a line. She stated that as a handicapped person, she was entitled to use the stall despite others with a pressing need to go. This isn’t the purpose of the ADA, the ADA is designed to give the handicapped the same rights as others not exclusive ones. Handicapped parking spaces are near the front of buildings because many people with disabilities simply cannot go large distances like an able-bodied person can. Handicapped accessible doorways and ramps are there for the same reason, however this does not mean the able-bodied cannot use these features.
Also, have you noticed that the handicapped stalls in many locations also double as a family accessible stall? It has the room to accommodate the fold out baby decks for people with children to change their kid’s soiled diapers. Do we tell them to screw off? What if there is a line, are we supposed to not use the stall because a handicapped person might come in? If there was a handicapped person in line at a crowded place, common courtesy would be to allow them to use the stall when it opened up, not move them to the front of the line just because of a disability
I like the “accessible/senior citizen seat on the bus” analogy.
If you want to use the handicap stall, use it. Assuming that you aren’t going to be taking a long time in there (and by that, I don’t mean if you actually need to take a long time), since someone who may need to use the handicap stall may come along.
All of our restrooms at work are handicapped accessible and there are no handicapped only restrooms.
So, even though I’m not handicapped, when I need a stall I go into the HC one. First, the seat is higher and there are hand rails which makes it much easier for my older wearing-out arthitic body to get down and back up. Second the HC stalls are rather spacious and are much easier for me since I’m claustrophobic. Third, the bigger stalls have much better ventilation.
Demand for the HC stalls is very low, so I’ve never prevented a handicapped person from actually using one.
One other point while talking about HC restrooms. I find it strange that different states have different code for handicapped accessible facilities – in my state, the men’s rooms require the short style of urinals, one at normal height, and one at a lower, wheelchair accessible height. Believe it or not, recently someone filed a complaint with the state because one of the urinals was 1/2 inch too high.
The states surrounding us have urinals that reach the floor, thus there is no need for a normal height one and a second short one – one works for all. Go figure.
They are not reserved. There are no handicapped permits for them. They put changing tables in some of them and sometimes a little seat to strap a small child into. Some restrooms only have one stall so it has to be big enough to accomodate whatever handicap someone might have. That doesn’t mean someone else can’t use it. Also if I’m close to having an accident I will run anyone down to avoid it. Otherwise if there is a line for the stalls and a handicapped person enters they should go to the front of the line for that stall but it should not be left empty when there is a line.
Where I live there are more than a few places where the handicaped stall is the only stall with a proper sit-down toilet. And when I use a hole-in-the-floor dealie things go… badly. So I go for it whenever it’s available.
my office men’s room has three stalls, one is handicapped accessible, I use it all the time because its the size of an efficiency apartment, about twice as big as my cubicle, which gives me a little more piece of mind when I poop
The restrooms are handicapped accessible, not handicapped exclusive. The handicapped get first dips on them and when a handicapped person is not present those stall can be used.
Does anyone really think a waiting line of women are going to leave every handicapped stall empty while the line slowly moves along just in case someone handicapped happens by? Not going to happen.
It is no different than a hotel room for handicap. If there is not handicapped person, the hotel will put someone else in the room if they need it. Use the stall and enjoy
I ALWAYS use the handicapped stalls and never think twice about it. All about the extra space and not ashamed to admit it. I don’t like strangers pissing 10 inches from me. Plus, these stalls are usually the last ones, and given I was a back of the bus and back of the classroom type of girl, it just makes sense. The handicapped stall is the corner office of the restroom world.
Wow, hot button topic. So here are some thoughts from a disabled person who has to use the accessible stalls. The idea behind the accessible movement is to make the world easier for more people to navigate. Curb cuts make it so wheelchair users can easily traverse a city, but they also make it easier to push a stroller or for little kids to ride their bikes out of traffic. They are not reserved for the exclusive use of the disabled.
Accessible toilets make it so more people can enjoy the public environments. If you are too tall, too phobic, need to corral your toddlers, or just too creaky to get up an down on the regular seat please use the accessible toilet. It is there to make your life easier. It is not reserved for the exclusive use of the disabled.
If there is a line for use of the facilities and you are the next in line for the disabled stall and you do not need the assistance it provides it is polite to ask if anyone else needs that stall. If there are no takers, then go ahead and use the stall.
As for the rather nasty complaints about fat people using the toilet. I have a muscle disease, there is nothing visual to mark me as disabled, I look pretty normal. Well except for all the extra weight you put on when your physical activities are curtailed. Combine that with some nasty drugs I have to take for my condition and I am the fat woman who got sneered at for using the disabled toilet. I get this rude treatment all the time. I finally just make a big show of rapping on my left leg. The hollow ringing sound usually stops the nasty comments.
You can not judge how disabled someone is by looking.
Going to the bathroom in a handicapped stall is not the same as parking your car in a handicapped spot. While you can always wait for a regular spot to open up or park in the back of the lot, sometimes when you gotta go to the bathroom, you gotta go.
A bathroom is a bathroom — some are handicapped accessible some aren’t (and I’ve been to plenty of places with one unisex bathroom that just happens to be wheelchair accessible). In my office there would only be one stall if the handicapped one were unavailable. I personally don’t like using the handicapped stall as I find the toilet is higher in many places and not as comfortable.
As for single-hole restrooms, well, if you have no choice, you have no choice.
For multiple-hole restrooms, if one does not require the extra room and higher seat (e.g., arthritis in the knees), use one of the other stalls.
If no other stalls are available, then have no choice, but don’t dawdle.
Personally, I do feel guilty using the handicap stall if all others are not available, but at that point, the Call of Nature has a higher priority, but I do try to hurry.
I see them as handicapped accessible, not reserved for the handicapped. In addition, in my entire life of 37 years, I have never once been in a bathroom where someone handicapped was actually using the stall. My husband says the same thing. He has never been in the bathroom and seen a handicapped person using the stall while he was in there.
I only use them if they are the last stall available, or if I have my small child with me. I don’t think they should sit there empty, not being used when I really have to go pee or am having an IBS attack and it is the only bathroom to use.
I’m an architect who works with the accessibility code every day. Anyone can use any stall. This is not an arguable point.
The pavement markings and signs that mark handicap stalls? The accessibility code describes in detail what and where those things are supposed to be, and the criminal code sets the penalties for using the stalls without permit.
There is absolutely nothing in any code anywhere that says who can and cannot use accessible toilet facilities.
Think about it and the answer is right there in the word accessible. We have these laws so people can have access to public accommodations. The laws aren’t to give them a pass to the front of the line, just access.
Obviously the only time men use stalls is if they need to take the Browns to the Super Bowl…that being said, it isn’t a big deal in men’s restrooms.
Even so, I would only use a handicapped stall if A) all the other stalls were occupied or B) there was a normal-sized stall, but it was dirty enough that I would rather use the handicapped stall.
I think that these guidelines would be pretty appropriate for women too.
As a handicapped person, with a service dog, I’ll use a regular stall if some prick is in the handicapped stall, but often that involves my dog sitting on their feet. I’ve gone into restrooms with several stalls, all empty, except the one handicapped stall.. Also, mind you I’m 6.5 feet tall, with a service dog. Those normal size stalls with me and my dog squeezed in is quite funny.
On a side note, in Michigan, there are rest-stops that have a “handicapped bathroom” When I was moving down state earlier this year, the mens room was closed, being re-routed to the handicapped room. Since it was “off season” this was mostly fine. Except there was some woman in the handicapped stall for like, 10 mins. Being rude is being rude.
yes it is. including your assumption that the woman was being rude by deliberately making you wait 10 minutes.
ever had the Period Flood from Hell? IBS? Food poisoning? UTI? any of these can make for a lengthy stay.
Its called “universal access” for a reason, and that is the intent of the building code.
Ever been in a single use toilet room? The *building code* requires it to be “accessible” to all, meaning that handicap people are able to use it; its not for their use only….. the same thing applies to those stupid ramps outside; anyone can walk on them. It would be the dumbest thing ever if every building that had a toilet room, had to have a completely separate toilet room for handicap people, those individuals make up far less than 10% of the population, and do you see anyone carrying around some kind of handicap card to use the potty? NO.
Also, as far as toilet rooms /restrooms with multiple stalls, when they are occupied we all have to wait our turn, most humans dont take more than say 1-2 minutes to do their business most of the time, maybe females take longer.
If all the stalls where being used, I would have to wait my turn just like the next guy, and so would they.
In an ideal world, All restrooms would have all toilets 100% accessible to all people, meaning every toilet would essentially be a handicap toilet, but the law (building code) only requires that at least 1 be provided for each sex. Making all of them accessible is a waste of valuable space and money for most building owners, is your office a celebration of where people take a poopie, or is it dedicated more to the spaces where they work and do productive activities.
pee or worse on the floor or use the empty stall?
no brainer folks.
There’s only 2 stalls in our office with 2 urinals as well. If i have to drop a deuce and stall 1 is in use, i’m sure as hell gonna use the handi-stall. All it is is wider with a drop down bar that lets you bear down and pass that mother past your cheeks with the quickness.
I use it whenever I feel like it.
But then again, I’m handicapped so…
I try not to park in handicap parking even though i have a permit though, if I feel well enough to get to the doors from a normal spot. Rather someone worse off get the closer parking. Pisses me off when I see folks that aren’t really handicapped using em too.