(emples)
I always assume everyone hates me, but here is some confirmation from an angry Starbucks barista whose name is not Egon, but who prefers to be referred to as such.
Egon let loose to a Phoenix New Times reporter about the many reasons he and his barista kin hate some of the people they serve coffee to.
Our favorite:
1.) Needless use of the lingo:I’m paid barely enough to refer to a “medium” as a “grande.” You have no fucking excuses to call that medium coffee a “grande bold.”
I call drinks “small, medium or large,” and always feel stupid when I’m corrected and told I want “grande.”
This makes me feel better, Egon. Thank you.
Maybe this will stop someone from writing “big dick” on your cup next time?
Why Your Starbucks Barista Hates You [Phoenix New Times]
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I’ve never had a problem ordering my grande bold. This barista sounds like a bit of a self-loathing prick.
Hey Egan, I ordered a Double Ristretto Venti Nonfat Organic Chocolate Brownie Frappuccino Extra Hot with Foam and Whipped Cream Upside Down Double Blended
I wanted some of the ingredients layered with exactly 0.08mm of blending between every other layer
the brownie chunks were all suppose to be within 0.7-1.0 square mm in size
The application of the whipped cream was suppose to be symmetrical with at least 98.76% accuracy.
You failed to provide the drink to me specifications and thus I request that you take it back and start all over until you do it correctly.
Alas you can’t order that anymore, Starbucks no longer has organic milk or brownie chunks unless you want to purchase a few brownies and have them cut them up and toss it in the blender.
Not to mention that it’s kind of hard to make a frozen drink extra hot…oh, I see what you did there.
Here’s why I stopped going to Starbucks ages ago: 1> snotty employees who look at me funny when I ask for a “large double-double”. Sorry, did you not learn the Canadian lingo yet? 2> their coffee tastes like it was filtered through dirty socks, and 3> Tim Hortons coffee tastes much better and is far less expensive than whatever excuse for coffee comes from Starbucks. Small wonder why the anarchist dicks went smashing up all the Starbucks here in Toronto over the weekend during the G20 summit (okay, I know, boo me, they just wanted to be a bunch of a-holes and smash up anything they can throw bricks at.) Nonetheless, I avoid Starbucks like the plague.
I would look at you funny but that’s because I’m not in Canada so I have no idea what that is.
I’d probably tell him that he’s an obnoxious jerk. Because I am from Canada. And cannot stand disrespectful and/or rude fellow customers.
And if I would be really feeling cranky, I’d also mention that double-double isn’t real coffee. Lattés and Esspressos are.
I’m from Canada, and an avid coffee drinker, and have NO idea what is a large ”double-double” means.
Baristas do not read thoughts. You are exactly the kind of client that irritate baristas. You’re basically saying ”you’re stupid if you don’t know what *I* want.” That is very obnoxious behaviour from my point of view. And I have never been a barista. I am just a client.
And if you loooove Tim Horton’s coffee so much, what do you do at Starbucks?
Hence the reason why I *don’t* go to Starbucks. Btw- any other coffee shop I go to, they know what a large double-double means. Sorry, but the last time I went to a Sbux and had to translate what “tall” and “venti” meant, my mind just about exploded. Fortunately they knew what “large” meant.
Aww, not knowing what a double-double is means you didn’t understand that very moving Olympics commercial with the nice grandfather and the little kid who plays hockey.
I love that commercial.
I don’t put sugar in my coffee, but I had to learn what a double-double was in cultural self defence.
(In case you actually don’t know, its Tims coffee with two sugar, two cream. Too much stuff for me, but Tim’s coffee is so awful that I understand the need to cover the taste. What on earth do they put in it to make it so addictive?)
The irony here is, the term double-double is as much of a piece of TimHo’s lingo as say, Tall, Grande or Venti is Sbux lingo. Double-double, at least not here in the West of Canada (and believe me, we have plenty of TimHo’s here) is NOT canadian vernacular. You wouldn’t go to Blenz or Waves coffee here and order a double-double.
Perhaps this is the reason why Sbux is going to give you free Wifi access come this Thursday? Try to win back the disgruntled who are sick of the snotty attitude of the baristas? Wonder how said baristas will feel when patrons will stay there for hours on end, asking where they can plug their laptops in so the batteries won’t die while mooching more free internet from them?
i used to work at seattles best (owned by starbucks) and it seems like baristas get the worst mix of customers. I once had a woman complain i put sugar in her plain latte and she claimed it sent her to a diabetic shock. It turned out she drank her daughters javakula(frapacino) that was ordered separately and i was not asked if there was sugar in it. I felt horrible because i didnt know that i was hired to babysit the customer through their dietary needs. Almost as bad are the people who want so much foam they keep sending it back despite the fact foam dissolves eventually
Didn’t you know that the ability to read minds, wipe butts and spoon fed people was required to work in the food service industry???
i used to work at seattles best (owned by starbucks) and it seems like baristas get the worst mix of customers. I once had a woman complain i put sugar in her plain latte and she claimed it sent her to a diabetic shock. It turned out she drank her daughters javakula(frapacino) that was ordered separately and i was not asked if there was sugar in it. I felt horrible because i didnt know that i was hired to babysit the customer through their dietary needs. Almost as bad are the people who want so much foam they keep sending it back despite the fact foam dissolves eventually
Point of interest, Starbucks makes working at other, independent coffee shops difficult. I will get a customer order a “tall coffee” and when I confirm that they want a small, they say “no, that’s a large” and then I want to bash my head against a wall because of their stupidity.
I get so used to ordering the special Starbucks way that when I go in anywhere else I screw up. I forget that I can call it a “medium” everywhere else. I don’t have to be pretentious and ask for a “grande,” but I always do.
My point was that starbucks folks don’t even know what their sizes mean. Tall is not a large…but somehow that’s what they meant. I’m so sick of Starbucks making my job harder. See also, their abomination of a macchiato.
Most customers are good and a few are great people you love to wait on, but the bad customers despite being the minority, just somehow manage to piss you off far more than the others make you feel good. They just stick in your head.
I can still remember some of my worst and they still piss me off; some 15 years later.
The first “complaint to the boss” was a lady who walked into the greenhouse and demanded service. The fact there were about 20 other people already there was irrelevant to her.
The lady with the little dog that had breath of 1000 corpses. And of course she held it right at my face level.
The “Hydranium” lady, she wanted a cross between a Hydrangea and a Geranium.
The “Japonica” lady, for 3 years she would come in and ask for a Japonica Bush. I kept explaining that that was only half of the plant’s latin name and all it meant was that it was “from Japan”.
The OCD Paint lady, I think her record was bringing back a gallon of paint 14 times in one week because “it’s not right”.
And my personal favorite, the Dramatic Hamster lady, she responded to everything just like the hamster. No mater what you said, Hi, Nice weather we are having, sorry we are out of roses, she would react with a look of dramatic shock, Duh, Duh, Dunnnnn!
It was actually a prairie dog, but okay…
At first it was kind of neat to order exactly the way my baristas ordered. But then it got old, and then I stopped having to order. Got some free goodies, too. Being a regular at an irregular time pays off.
Someone buy this guy a box of tampons. He’s clearly premenstrual.
Egon should have studied harder in school so he could have qualified for a job where he doesn’t hate his customers.
Getting paid more does not mean that the customers don’t suck. If you have customers some of them will suck, no exceptions.
I love these minimum wage losers who express their frustrations with their empty lives by mistreating paying customers, then post stories like this and expect to find a sympathetic ear. If the BEST job you can obtain as an adult is pouring cups of coffee, let me offer an alternative suggestion;
Here’s the equation, Einstein (for all you baristas out there, Albert Einstein was a very famous smart man)
Strong rope + tall tree + ladder = end of your problems.
Next in line, please!!!
Strong rope + tall tree + ladder = end of your problems.
Do everyone a favor and take your own advice.
Izumms maddums because someone hurt your widdow feelings?
Go cry to your mama, loser.
Why I hate SB baristas: you make at least minimum wage, yet you think you deserve a tip. You don’t. Plenty of people in the service industry (food and non) hustle to get you what you want, but don’t get anything more than their wage. Deal with it. Don’t think you’re special just because you get people what they ask for.
This should be “why this barista hates you”, the Starbucks I frequent has really nice baristas that always deliver what I want. Honestly, most people hate the place for overpriced coffee but the indy coffee houses are way downtown or off the beaten path which makes me waste gas to null the savings.
Starbucks is actually a decent company to work for, and if this guy feels he is so much better than everyone else he can give that job to someone else.
My favorite barista is the single dad of 4 who is there for the insurance benefits. He is the happiest barista I have ever met.
All the people with the “If he doesn’t like the job, get a new one” attitudes are all the reasons he’s so bitter. You think these people are here to do whatever you want in the name of “customer service”. Anyone who has waited tables knows that people expect you to kiss and wipe their golden asses. How about we stop giving every employee at Starbucks or McDonalds a hard time about “customer service”. These jobs are the worst. It’s just coffee and it’s just a hamburger.
Let’s turn the tables a bit…
The Baristas (I hate that word) should love us. Without us, they don’t have jobs! Personally, I’m not a fan of Starbucks coffee. I only go there for the wifi. I do buy drinks, but not coffee. They should love me for how easy I make it for them.
Anyone who has worked in the service industry or retail sales will know that this how some people cope with the constant flow of people. Having spent many years in retail I totally relate to Egon, I would blow off steam with fellow coworkers about the common annoyances of the job and customers. Sometimes it would get downright vulgar and funny and it helped deal with the mindlessness of the job and sometimes difficult people we would deal with, but I would never let the public see that side. I think we all do this on some level or another, every job has things something that you don’t agree with, most times it doesn’t get published in an article online.
Anyone who has worked in the service industry or retail sales will know that this how some people cope with the constant flow of people. Having spent many years in retail I totally relate to Egon, I would blow off steam with fellow coworkers about the common annoyances of the job and customers. Sometimes it would get downright vulgar and funny and it helped deal with the mindlessness of the job, but I would never let the public see that side.
I simply see Egon as just another member of the anti-customer movement. We had a similar story in our university paper, in which a worker complained that customers should only be allowed to order things exactly as they are on the menu (especially if it is something you could pull off yourself). He must be friends with Panera Bread girl, and Chick fila guy, both of who glared at me when I asked for a salad without chicken (I am a vegetarian…not PETA member though).
Luckily, the majority of people in the service industry do not feel above serving customers. The workers at the university coffee shop are always quick getting my drink and servers at a restaurant I visit weekly have my drink at my table as soon as I walk inside (for this, and the fact they have given me free drinks, deal with my strange orders, and always give me a cup of soda to go, I tip them about 30%).
I am glad he didn’t mention tips. I DO NOT TIP at Starbucks. Go ahead…gasp. I actually don’t tip at ANY coffee shop. I buy plain coffee. No cream. No flavor squirts. I order black coffee. Therefore, I find it stupid to spend an extra 50 cents because a person was able to pull a lever.
Sounds like this kid lives at home and his parents pays his bills.
When they make the sizes on their board “small, medium, and large” instead of “medium, large, and extra large” (with small being unadvertised but available) then I’ll stop using their stupid terms.
The number of times I’ve ended up with a small size when I’ve wanted a medium size is a few too many.
Screw it. Find a locally owned coffee shop with better prices, better service and less pretense.
What an angry little man. That is the stuff you deal with in a customer service job. Why would he even want to work there if he can’t deal with that kind of interaction? Maybe he should be putting his resumes out to other places that deal less with the public.
Why would he even want to work there if he can’t deal with that kind of interaction?
Because he enjoys having enough money to feed and clothe himself.
Sorry, but there is a reason they correct you: THEY WANT YOU TO GET WHAT YOU ORDERED. They really have 4 sizes, so even “medium” is potentially ambiguous. When you tell a SBUX Barista you want a large coffee and they ask you if you mean “venti” they aren’t being pretentious a-holes or because they have drunk so much of the kool-aid that they cannot understand normal sizes, they just want to make sure you get the one you want.
I think if the Starbucks barista hates you then it is a big clue to do what he wants and never see him and the store again. Why would I go to a business that has employees that hate me?
People are missing what’s really being said, he hates the customers. Not the job. He probably loves the job when the tools aren’t around to be morons.
If he’s a dude shouldn’t he be called a ‘baristo?’
There’s a reason I have never worked retail or in customer service – because I know I would end up looking/feeling like a complete asshole like “Egon”.
There’s just some of us that shouldn’t be working in those fields.
How does this absolutely inane posting about a whiny kid who doesn’t like it when customers order items by their menu name come from a website that was just named one of the top 25 blogs?
It feels akin to the curse of the Sports Illustrated cover… regression to the mean.
Maybe they hate their job so much because their coffee blows? I’ll take my happy local coffee baristas and their yummy coffee (and it’s cheaper too!) that comes in Big or Small.
All these people acting like they absolutely love every single aspect of their own jobs are liars and they know it.
My fiancée and I were in a Starbucks very close by our apartment a few months ago, and it was one of the most satisfying experiences of my life.
My girlfriend usually gets a Vanilla Latte, and asks for a little bit of their Caramel Sauce (which is unbelievably delicious) drizzled over the top.
She ordered and the girl politely rang her up, but then the “Barista” a few feet away must have heard the exchange, and felt the need to insert her snotty coffee snob information:
“Actually, just for future reference, what you ordered is a Caramel Macchiato”. The girl actually had the nerve to say this to us.
The reason this was an exceptional experience was because just the night before, we happened to watch Good Eats with Alton Brown, who did a whole show on Coffee.
A Latte, we had learned was espresso/coffee first, and then steamed milk next so it all mixes and makes a weaker, creamier coffee.
A Macchiato is usually steam milk first, with a slightly larger ratio of espresso, not mixed.
It was an incredibly satisfying experience to cut down an egotistical “Barista” coffee expert with the knowledge of what the drinks she prepares on a daily basis actually are.
Her response was “oh….actually yeah I think you’re right..”, after the Cashier had agreed with me.
Maybe Egon should be ghostbusting and not working in anything that involves customer service. I worked at a restaurant for 5 years and I enjoyed talking to people. Yeah, you definitely get some jerky customers, but I always thought it was nice when someone wanted to talk to me like a human being instead of just ordering without so much as a hello.
These aren’t even good reasons for a Barista to hate you. I could understand having that much anger if it was directed at people who stay on their cell phones through the entire transaction, or people who are determined to get more for their money (iced coffee with no ice, and a cup of ice on the side? come on, you’re not fooling anyone, just go make coffee at home).
I’m a rule-follower and if the the menu I read says tall or small or whatever else, that’s what I will call it. If grande bold is such a hot button word for Egon then he should consider switching to a different coffee chain. Or go to a Target Starbucks, they say whatever they want there.
I actually just realized I’m a bit of a douche in my own job with one particular bit of lingo.
Some people here call LCD projectors “overhead projectors” by token of them being installed literally over head in many rooms. But when I wheel it into a room on a cart…they still call it an overhead projector, which it most certainly isn’t. An overhead projector shows transparencies. An LCD projector is a multimedia projector for laptops, video inputs, etc.
What makes it worse is that the people in my department use the wrong nomenclature as well, just precipitating the confusion when something asks for equipment.
“I need an overhead projector for my meeting tomorrow.”
“Okay, not a problem. Just to clarify, you need that for transparencies?”
“Oh, no, I need to connect my laptop.”
It was funny the one time someone requested a 35mm slide projector…and then couldn’t figure out where to plug in their laptop.
So, I will admit to being a lingo douche in my job, but I’d like to think my gripe is a little more specific.
So this guy, right?
http://www.mcarterbrown.com/gallery/data/999/Carl_athf.jpg
Don’t like the job or the customers? Get an education and move up. You serve me coffee and danishes, get over yourself.
So easy to fire off a comment like that without taking into account that maybe he did get an education and that’s the only job he could get in this economy. It doesn’t say whether or not that’s the case in the article, but you would’ve known that isn’t necessarily true if you read it.
while you and the english speaking community just finds tall grande and venti anoying, people who speak spanish have it harder, in real life we would order a chico, mediano o grande (small, medium, large) so when we order a grande coffee at Starbucks we get confused, did we just order a real large or a starbucks medium, did the guy understand what we meant? its madness
Normally, I’d side with service industry workers, but seriously, this is pretty lame. The first item is Starbuck’s fault. The rest just sound like the worker doesn’t care for the type of clientele that Starbucks generally serves. If that’s the case, why would you get a job at a place like that. It isn’t exactly news that you’d be serving people like that at a Starbucks.
I just go with the more universal way of ordering. For example, a one-quarter liter espresso, hold the attitude, etc.
“angry Starbucks barista whose name is not Egon, but who prefers to be referred to as such”
You don’t have to read any further to see the guy has issues. Some lib professor probably taught him that he can express himself more if he called himself Egon.
Employee:”I call drinks “small, medium or large,” and always feel stupid when I’m corrected”
I’ve never heard a customer correct an employee, but too often you find a DB employee who feels the need to correct the customer when asked for a large coffee. “You mean a Venti…..”
I think the “e” at the end of Egon is just a typo, right? Egon… Ego… get it? Yeah, I didn’t think it was that funny either. ; )
Why I hate Starbucks Baristas:
1. They apparently think very poorly of the customer, and if a customer orders something as labeled on the menu, get very pissed off because you’re not ordering like a “person with common sense.” (Because people with common sense wouldn’t dare fucking go to Starbucks.)
A little customer service goes a long way. It’s too bad Egon knows nothing about that apparently.
No comment on the article, just an FYI from a former barista:
The original naming convention for drinks was Short (8oz) Tall (12oz) and Grande (16oz)
It wasn’t until years later that they added the Venti (20oz) and removed the Short size from the menu.
This is also why the medium size is called “Large”. It originally was.
Well they just added another way to confuse the crap outta me. For YEARS when I wanted non fat whatever, I would order Skinny. Now if you say skinny, they ask if I meant Lite. There is now skinny, and lite. I don’t understand the difference between the two. someone clue me in please?
When I saw the headline, my first thought was “Because you want a cup of COFFEE rather than some ridiculously overpriced thing with 9 kinds of flavor syrup, foam, steamed milk, and powdered chocolate dumped into it.
This is why I avoid Fourbucks. I’m a COFFEE drinker. Praise ‘bou.
Every time I’ve EVER said Small, Medium or Large, it’s ALWAYS repeated back in Starbuck language as “Ok, so that’s a (Tall, Grande, Venti) frappucino, no whip, etc.”
I felt pretty stupid using the Starbucks jargon.