Deep Down, Your Parking Garage Will Always Wonder What Might Have Been

Ben in New York City (not Popken) had a problem with his parking garage. He writes that even though he canceled his account in three different ways, the garage kept billing him. So he wrote a nice complaint letter that was playful, comparing the parking garage to a jilted lover who just couldn’t let him go. A company representative wrote back, playing along–and severing Ben’s relationship with the garage for good.

Here’s Ben’s original e-mail, which he copied Consumerist on:

Dear [Company],

In April, I stopped utilizing your garage at [redacted] NYC and I cancelled my account in three different ways:

1) I called the New York regional office to tell them that I was going to be leaving at the end of the month.
2) I faxed a cancellation letter to the New York office in April.
3) I dropped a letter off at the garage in April to be handed to the manager.

I naively figured this trifecta would be sufficient. But I’m guessing you are not getting the hint very well.

Look, it’s not you, it’s me. Don’t blame the fact that you almost doubled the rates in my garage without telling me. Honestly. I really value the time I spent parking there, and it will always be an integral part of my car’s history.

But, I am seeing another garage now…. yes, I know it is soon, but I figured it would be best to tell you, rather then letting you see pictures of my car in a new parking spot on facebook. I tried the street parking scene for a while, but I just ended up rebounding into another garage as soon as I saw one I liked.

So, I know this is hard, but please stop billing me. It would mean so much to me! I don’t mind if you pretend that we spent May and June together, but it’s sort of awkward if you keep billing me for it.

Take care!

Ben

An hour later, he received this response:

Dear Ben..

Ending a relationship is never easy – it’s hard to let go. I thought the FB pics were just a joke… and I thought that was your car I saw on the street when I was down town for the film festival but I just didn’t want to believe it… I thought – how could you choose the street over us? I tried to drown my sorrow in several venti chai’s that day but it was no use… the vision of your car parked there – in the filthy street – it was too much to bear….

Hard as it may be, we have no choice but to let you go – I will make sure that Chris submits the final separation papers as soon as possible..…. At least we had April together…. I hope you and your new garage are very happy….

Meanwhile, the garage spent the next weekend ranting on the phone to all of its garage friends about what a jerk Ben is and watching Top Gear reruns.

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