Unlike the ones from the previous post, I actually agree with these. 67 might not apply to a restaurant that's already noisy but that's about it.

These are all ok. The last list was rediculous (the do not give your name thing, wtf?) but this is all pretty much common sense.

Though if you get ketchup with a steak, you will be laughed at in the kitchen, you rube. Especially if you're paying the prices that have to be charged for this level of service in a NYC restaurant.

#62 is something i mentioned yesterday. my biggest annoyance when going out to eat.

Don't do this, don't do that... theres a saying in Gujarati that roughly translates to "Why dont you just kill me already?". I bet my sister would say that if she saw this list.

#54 - This is great. I watch for deals and often will pick a restaurant based on a Prix Fixe deal, or other special. I recently went to a pricey restaurant in my town, mentioned to the hostess when we made the reservation that we were coming for the advertised special.

When I got to the table, the special was not advertised anywhere. We asked the waitress, and her response "Well, it is 'special', so people have to ask". This left a bad taste in my mouth (not literally, the food was wonderful).

As a restaurant, if you are having a promotion, to get people in the door to try your restaurant, be forthright about honoring it.

If I have to ask for the deal, it makes me feel cheap (OK, I am, but don't force me to make it obvious in front of my date).

62a is a big "Duh!"

85 -- not sure I agree here. It should be apparent when the check is appropriate.

Here's a good one: Never EVER have the person bussing tables deliver my food. There are waiters and there are bussers. The busser is touching other people's used silverware/etc. The waiter is (assumed to) have clean hands, for the purpose of serving clean food.

85 only works if they don't just vanish for a hour after your food arrives. if you're going to do that, just leave the bloody check with the food.

I complete, completely agree with #64. One of the things I hate the most about wait staff rattling off the specials is that there is never, ever a price attached, or it's just spoken very quickly like no one wants you to know it's the most expensive thing on the menu. I like restaurants that include a specials page with the menu and include prices because then I have all of the information right there.

I also agree with #70. I hate it when a waiter/waitress wants me to pass along a plate. Yes, I get that you may have T-Rex arms, but you should have figured out how to compensate for that by now because the table size doesn't change. Don't ask me to be a waitress as well, unless you're willing to split a tip with me.

There are more ramifications than just looking bad, when it comes to #98 (Do not wear too much makeup or jewelry). If you've got tons of makeup on, it's probably not going to be as blended with your skin as it would be if you just had one light layer of makeup, and you're more likely to be clogging pores. If you touch your face or brush your hair back, then you touch a plate, it can deposit oils and makeup.

#85 Don't bring the check until I ask for it.

YES! Can't begin to describe how annoying it is to me and my wife when this happens.

Many restaurants have lost out on selling us dessert when we are asked if we want dessert before we are halfway through our entree, and are then given the bill just as we are done.
It can be almost a hassle to be allowed to sit for another 10-15 minutes in some restaurants to be ready for dessert, when the server comes by every 4-5 minutes to ask if we are ready. I never understood this fascination with dining on the run - being in and out in 45 minutes. I go to a restaurant to sit down and relax with my food.

@jokono:
I work at a restaurant as a busser and sometimes guests will ask that I bring them something. Only once, though, was I asked by a server to follow her to a table. At least where I work, we have to wash our hands after we visit the dish pit and before we go back out to set the tables. The only time this does not happen is on peak nights, but that is because we have two bussers in the dining room; one clears the other sets.

62. Do not fill the water glass every two minutes, or after each sip. You'll make people nervous.

While you're at it, don't just give refills without asking. I hate seeing things go to waste, and I don't drink a lot. I can't stand waiters/waitresses who just plop a full drink in front of me when I know it's just going to waste. Besides, then if the drink isn't finished, I look like the bad guy.

78. Do not ask, "Are you still working on that?" Dining is not work - until questions like this are asked.

I hate this. When I'm done, I'll offer my plate or move it to the side, not a second sooner.

85. Never bring a check until someone asks for it. Then give it to the person who asked for it.

Yes, it's not OK to just throw the check on the table. In fact, it's stupid. The waiter/waitress could potentially miss out on extra revenue. If I see a check brought without my approval, it makes me feel like a burden rather than a paying customer. It's fine to ask if everyone is finished, then bring the check, however.

@sicknick: Sure, but who cares if the kitchen laughs at them?

@sicknick: People put ketchup on steak?!

@pecan 3.14159265: YES. And pricey steak, too. I have seen people put A1 on filet mignon as well.

63. Never blame the chef or the busboy or the hostess or the weather for anything that goes wrong. Just make it right.

This. If I order a steak medium rare and it comes out cold or there is no hint of color in the middle... I don't care whose fault it was, but that isn't what I ordered and I'd like it fixed. Please just fix it, preferably before the people I am dining with finish their meals.

@Rectilinear Propagation: Yeah, it seems like the two articles should have been reversed. This stuff seems like normal, common sense things that everyone will pretty much agree on, as opposed to "NEVER LOOK THE DINER IN THE EYES."

Never bring a check until someone asks for it

Sweet! If I never ask for the check, I don't have to pay!

@j-o-h-n: AMEN! Although I prefer that to the opposite problem (I haven't checked the original article to see if it made the list) of telling a guest who has been made to wait too long for the food to "Hurry Up, we need the table".

This bimbo waitress made the mistake of doing that to me one night and I told her just for that, and for making us wait too long, we were staying EXTRA long and taking our time and wouldn't pay her until we were good and ready. This beeyotch then had the NERVE to summon a police officer to the table to ask me if there was a problem. I calmly said absolutely not, officer, just enjoying our meal we are paying for here.

I then proceeded after eating as slowly as I could with friends, just to piss them off, to demand a manager on the way out, and ask them where they come off treating paying guests like that (and I was sure to do it where most of the other diners could hear me too.) When the manager proceeded to defend the waitress, I proceeded to slam them in every newspaper, website, etc. in the region and further contacted every restaurant reviewer and a talk show about it. The situation got discussed by experts, written up in the reviews, etc., without exception every expert telling folks how ridiculous the manager and owner were, and they lost a ton of business.

Not everyone who is in the restaurant business should be, or will be eventually when they resent and mistreat their paying customer base.

@h3llc4t, breaker of office dress codes: But A1 is steak sauce. That's different.

"Do not ask if a guest is finished the very second the guest is finished. Let guests digest, savor, reflect."

I'll restate my post on the first 50: Sometimes I want a 2-3 hour meal. It's how it should be. Don't ask me if I'm done with my meal right after the last bite or especially when there are a few bites left. No I am not done, I am reflecting on the meal I just had - and reflecting on how good a service I received. Interrupt that, and the service becomes "poor".

@gStein_has joined the star bandwagon: This happened to me once, so I made it a game. I wanted to see if I could make it through a glass before the waiter came to refill it.

My bladder lost.

@sicknick: But to be clear, I am the customer, if I want to put Mayonaise on my Kobe Filet, that is my choice. It may be culinarily offensive, but I am paying, I am the customer, I am "always right".

Same goes for ordering a steak well done. It isn't wrong, if that is how the diner likes it cooked.

Point is, the waiter shouldn't pass judgment.

@pecan 3.14159265: I dunno, I feel like a filet mignon is the kind of the steak that should be appreciated on its own. Don't get me wrong, most food serves simply as a vehicle for condiments for me, so it's nothing against A1.

In general this list is better than the first half. But these lists seem to be awfully anti-personality. If I'm eating out I want to be served by a person not a robot.

I'd add:

101. If you have a personality, show it. If you don't have a personality, find a different line of work.

102. When a guest temporarily leaves the table, do not neaten his/her place: don't move utensils around, don't refold napkins, etc.

103. Don't hover.

@squinko: It's seen as a challenge for dominance. The diner might slowly change the conversation to how much money he/she makes while the waiter is there. If eye contact is continued after that point, it might just devolve into poo-flinging.

"85. Never bring a check until someone asks for it. Then give it to the person who asked for it."

Oh, really disagree with this one. I shouldn't have to beg for the check any more than I should have to ask to have my water glass filled. Perhaps this rule works well at destination restaurants for fine dining but in most instances I really hate having to track down a waiter for the check. It is one of my pet peeves.

@h3llc4t, breaker of office dress codes: "...most food serves simply as a vehicle for condiments for me..."

Pretty much. When I have a sandwich, it's like, "Just how much mayo can I get on this thing before I stroke out?" You get a heart clicky for that. :D

As someone with food allergies, I think #55 is a biggie. It bothers me when restaurant staff (waitstaff and/or kitchen staff) don't know what allergens or ingredients are in dishes, but it bothers me more when waitstaff don't readily offer to find someone who does know or seem perturbed with you for having an allergy.
I appreciate that they're not required to serve me and that I may be asking more questions than the average customer, but at that point I'm going somewhere else.

@h3llc4t, breaker of office dress codes: I never put sauce of any kind on steaks. IMO, a steak should be so well seasoned and perfectly cooked that you shouldn't need any augmentation to its flavor. I've had a few steaks that had a very light sauce that was part of the marinade, but I always stay away from ordering steaks that are supposed to be covered in some kind of sauce.

@Skeptic: I'm with you, I hate having to chase down a waiter and ask for a check. It makes me feel like I have to beg them to pay. Don't make me work hard to give you my money.

If it's a higher end establishment, "May I bring you anthing else" is an easy way of giving the diner the option of saying, "No thank you - just the check" without the server presenting the check before being requested.

Did the same person write this? These (those reported here at least) are all good, solid points of ettiquitte. Completely unlike the first half.

@Skeptic: It goes hand in hand with the rule about not abandoning a table. If you're always floating around and handling the tasks like a good waiter should be, I should have no problem seeing you and you I. I should also never have to wait long for my check if waiters would just abide by the original rule. It's when waiters are inattentive that everything falls apart and you end up waiting 20 minutes for a check.

@nucwin83: Yeah we went out to eat recently and they were under staffed in the kitchen, food was very very slow to come out and we were in a hurry.
The waitress just continually blamed the kitchen instead of offering to see if there was anything she could do to make it right.

@sicknick: The "do not give your name" thing is pretty much confined to restaurants where the entrees cost more than $15, which is what the guy was planning on opening, and this list is what he wants waiters to do at his restaurant.

It's pretty typical and considered good service when a waiter *doesn't* introduce himself at higher end restaurants, and actually, something I happen to prefer.

@BrazDane: The fascination is with money. In the time it takes you to eat to dessert two new customers could have ordered appetizers and entrees, so you really need to eat your meal and dessert simultaneously.

@pecan 3.14159265: A1, makes steaks taste like A1. ;)

82. Refrain from touching the wet spots on the guest.

If a cute ass waitress spilled something on me, she can touch my wet spots.

On major important thing they forget.
Wash you hands after you use the bathroom.

@h3llc4t, breaker of office dress codes: Eh, filet mignon is overrated... if anything it needs extra flavor... (why do you think it's always wrapped in bacon, topped w/ blue cheese, etc...)

@pecan 3.14159265: what about a nice compound butter?

@MostlyHarmless: I'd love to have that phrase in the original Gujarati...does it translate to Roman characters at all?

@vladthepaler: One more thing to add to - doesn't necessarily have to do with waitstaff so much as hosts/hostesses but also sometimes waitstaff

- Do not argue over who has an extra table space or who needs more customers or where you should put them IN FRONT OF guests waiting to be seated.
- Do not LIE about the wait for guests. If it is going to be an hour, then say that. If you say 20 minutes, keep saying 5 more minutes every time you're asked and it happens to be an hour, guests will probably stay this time but they're NEVER COMING BACK. If something happens to hold things up, causing the wait to be must longer for a party than you originally informed them it would be, arrange for them to receive something complimentary with their meal for their time WITHOUT THEM HAVING TO ASK. One of my BIGGEST pet peeves of all time with restaurants, especially every time I'm at the mall and get dragged to some stupid Olive Garden/PF Changs chain that gives you a beeper, tells you 20 minutes and fetches you 2 hours later.

@boogermike: Regarding wanting steaks well done, if the chef can't cook meat well done without burning it then they need to learn. It's not impossible.

Somehow I've never, in my entire life, dined high class enough to end up finding out what a "prix fixe" is. My elementary french says it means "fixed price"... but I've never heard of a place that charges different prices to different people, I figured that went away with racism and such.

@MostlyHarmless: A lot of these items are just unspoken qualities of good service. The reason they are being spoken and enumerated by this guy in list-form is that these rules differ from what you find at some restaurants, sometimes drastically (like, don't give your name, don't say what your favorite dessert is), because at some restaurants these things are restaurant *policy*. "Hi, I'm Ted, would you like to try the Extreme! Fajitas?!"

I go to a few restaurants where the service follows this list to a T and they aren't really "fancy" joints, and the service is remarkably good. It is definitely what I prefer when dining out. my favorite restaurant is one of the few places that follows #64, giving prices for recited specials. Did the waiters there read this list? No, they were trained well and are extremely professional. The restaurateur knows what he's doing.

@Rectilinear Propagation: I used to like steaks well done, when I was younger. I definitely prefer a medium to medium well now, though. I just can't eat a steak that's well done anymore. The flavor and texture is so much better in the medium range.

What is the protocol for when you bleed on a table? Once I sliced my thumb pretty bad on a wine foil, and didn't notice I was bleeding until I saw blood dripping on a guest's menu!

@boogermike: Agreed. Though I think you can refer to it as the "tasting menu" or something to make it less awkward.

@je suis whore: Most of the ones in the article are too. He says the entire list is specifically for a restaurant he is opening soon but it seems like the two halves ended up being sorted into "fancy restaurants only" for the first half and "restaurants in general" for the second.

@Skeptic: A good waiter should be observing the tables in his or her area. Nothing more than a glance should be required on the diner's part to indicate that he needs something. The best lesson I've ever gotten in how good a good waiter can be - Restaurant Eve in Alexandria, VA. They should give lessons.