Quoting from The Crying Of Lot 49:

Ick.

Something easy in, easy out?

Looks like that bed has already been used for the "ultimate sin!"... coulda got a nicely made bed guys!

@100-mortgage.com: ...I think that was the point.

The Groton Motor Inn, Groton CT. Their radio ads were always "If you are having an affair, have it at the Groton Motor Inn." I'm pretty sure they were promoting their banquet facilities, but who knows....

This is the reason I take my sleeping bag with me to hotels - whether they are four stars or one star.

ice machines. Lots of ice machines.

If TV has taught us anything is that, if your rich you do it at a hotel, if you're poor you do it in your house and pray your significant other doesn't come home.

price.

When I worked at a hotel, we had a slew of regular affairs. We all knew what they were doing, they had to know that we all knew. It was a little sad.

The alley behind the bar?

@Skankingmike:
True, absolutely true.

- Must accept cash
- No surveillance cameras

@pb5000: I should add, I worked at a very nice 4 star hotel. These were classy affairs.

Let me now publicly lament over the lack of Japanese-style Love Hotels here in the states.

"It would be so cool, why can't we have one here?"

Zanzibar? Rome? Beverly Hills? This isn't very realistic: affairs are really expensive. Flowers, jewelry, costly meals, alcohol, and now I gotta take her halfway around the world for a little tryst? What's the matter with a $39 room by the highway?

I like ashleymadison.com's motto: LIFE IS SHORT. HAVE AN AFFAIR.™ Classy.

Don't go to The Standard in NYC...apparently with those giant windows, a side benefit would be if you were looking to blackmail someone or you were the spouse. All you have to do is go to the High Line park with a long-range zoom lens!

-1 for the 'Funny' tag...

@Applekid: We have those here in Puerto Rico. They're ridiculous and amazing and disgusting all at once.

I want to do a documentary on love hotels around the world.

In Japan, there are "love hotels" especially for this, that rent for an hour or two or overnight. Check-in is discreet at most places, without ever seeing an employee's face or even talk to anyone, and if one is using a car, the hotel will place a sign behind the car in the parking lot to hide the license plate.

@pb5000: Sad :(

I was going to go to Il Palazzetto but I couldn't get there and back over lunch hour.

Now is it necessary for one or both parties to be married for it to qualify as an "affair"?

Could just be a secretish business between two singles. No cheating required. Except for the fact that you are probably cheating on your peer group.

@100-mortgage.com: More like ultimate pleasure! :)

@pb5000: I worked at a hotel once too. We were told never to say things like, "your wife" or "your girlfriend" when referring to a man's female guest.

And never bring up the last time he visited.

Man, if I was going to have an affair, I hotel SO wouldn't be worth it. For that amount of trouble, I wanna get laid on top of a mountain, or sneakily in public, or in a hot-air balloon or the back of a limo...you know, something fun. If I want to get some in a bed, I can do it at home! ;)

@dohtem: Or the little death.

Just to stay classy: a condom dispenser in the bathroom.

@Mr_Human: ah, le petit mort!

@cmdrsass:

Don't forget:

-Hourly rates

The most important quality for making a hotel good for cheating is HOURLY RATES.

Get in, do your business, and get out.

@BabyFirefly: When travelling around Mexico we were a little disgusted when we realized the receptionists in some hotels were confused by us wanting to stay the whole night.
Worse - we had stayed in a couple of these before we finally figured it out.

@JGKojak: Middle class prefer the motel to the hotel

@100-mortgage.com: Ah, yes. One can always spot a sexed up bed on site. The smashed pillows, badly wrinkled sheets... dead give aways. haha.

@Skankingmike: Or in you car!

I always ask my friends, "What's your favorite hotel for having an affair?" If done with the spouse present, hilarity ensues.

@jfielder23: you should see it when I have someone else in there with me!!

@zandar: and thick towels and garbage bags, lots and lots of garbage bags.

@dohtem: I would totally do it anyway (on purpose). Men who break their marriage vows deserve to be ratted on, not protected.

Besides, they'll be found out eventually anyway.

@RandomHookup: And with your screen name... :-)

@GuinevereRucker: Men who break their marriage vows deserve to be ratted on, not protected.

Women, too. What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

@el-brazo-onofre: Although I have no doubt they are used for this as well, Love Hotels in Japan primarily feed on the fact that many people there don't leave home until they get married. If you are a 20-something seeking some QT with your significant other you choices are limited essentially to ....well, the "Love" hotels.

@Applekid: They have those in ghetto areas. "rests" instead of a "stay".

@The Porkchop Express: thick SOFT towels. because if you are washing off the evidence you don't want to leave red marks on your skin from scrubbing with industrial sandpapery towels.

@umbriago: have you ever been in a $39 room by the highway?
some people have affairs for the romantic aspect if they aren't getting it at home.
it's hard to be romantic [or even enjoy your regular vacation] in a room with a 3 inch thick mattress that sags in the middle and on both sides with a stain on the floor suspiciously person sized and rust colored. ewwwww

@jake.valentine: yeah, i could have used such a hotel back when i was living with the 'rents, although my boyfriend had a boogie van. even now, with a insomnic, homebody teenager at home, i could use the privacy of a one-hour hotel, sigh...

@dohtem: Interesting. I still remember being about 10 years old, and going to check into a hotel where my dad was having a meeting. My parents have different last names, and they wouldn't let my mom check in because they were convinced she wasn't his wife, and they told her they didn't condone that sort of thing. As if some woman who's having an affair is going to bring along her children? They wouldn't even listen when my dad's secretary came out to tell them she was, in fact, his wife. To this day I don't know how the hotel got away with that behavior.

@catastrophegirl: Or you could always save yourself the trouble of a divorce in the future if you stopped thinking about "I, I, I" for a moment and actually tried to, I don't know, support and care for someone you VOWED to never betray? Yes, that just has "romance" written all over it.

@AgamemnonV1: well i'm single so it's never been a problem. but i did work in a hotel for a few years and as a hotel concierge, i have seen a lot of this