Straddle And Ride Your Wii Someday
If you adore your Wii but lament the fact that its motion controls don't allow you to get more intimate with it, take heart. The company has patented a controller that lets you straddle it and ride it like a big boy.
Siliconera scoped out a European patent database to discover the somewhat disturbing innovation:
The inflatable seat has a pocket for the Wii remote, which is used to sense movement via the accelerometers. Players hold the nunchuck to simulate holding the reins or, as the Nintendo patent describes, "a raised hand for balance as in Bronco riding, a lasso, a sword or other weapon, etc."
The story goes on to say that the controller will work with games that simulate not only riding horses but "bulls, camels, elephants, burros, dolphins, whales, dragons, griffons, unicorns, giant eagles..." Whoah there, Nintendo. All the other things are standard — who hasn't dreamed of riding Ms. Pac-Man, uh, I mean, a unicorn — but giant eagles? Nintendo, you're even freakier than I imagined.
Siliconera [Siliconera, via Joystiq]
(Photo: Siliconera)
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Comments:
I for one would LOVE to ride a giant eagle. Just not from behind though.
Eagle riding, wink wink nudge nudge.
Porn applications in 3... 2... 1....
I want a narwhal riding game!!!!! where at the end after level 100 my narwhal will grow wings and fly
oh god...is it bad that my first thought was that the child in the picture was riding a Sybian?
@katstermonster: Probably. On the other hand my first thought was that if that ever came out, we'd very quickly see a few...um...attachments...for it, along with some "interactive software." Which is at least as bad, I'm sure.
Looks like they're going after the all-important furry demographic.
I sold my Wii to a guy to play with his kid.
I'm having second thoughts now.
@Smashville: That first sentence seems so wrong. Just rethink it. Please add a "so he can" after instead of "to" LOL
...but does it vibrate?
The little boy in the picture looks like he's potty training. That's great. Now you can use your tv.
@GitEmSteveDave's$10SamsungTV: Will you smite your enemies?
(FYI, if you don't get this reference then just forget it, not worth explaining)
Why wait for the someday when you can straddle and ride your Wii when you could straddle and ride me today?
I think that's a winner line for my personals ad, what do you think?
@katstermonster: So that's why nintendo wanted to make all those wii controller accessories!
Who's going to be Jenna Jameson and try it out? ;-)
@pb5000: Wrong reference.
Think more:
"If you wanna be rich
Gotta be a bitch.
R-i-c-h...
B-I-T-C-H."
@Skankingmike: Although with the transaction complete, he won't need an inflatable seat for gratification...
@Applekid: But if someone straddled you, wouldn't it all end up with befuddled looks and apple sauce splattered across the walls?
"Riding Ms. PacMan"
Snort. I almost shot cereal out my nose.
Shut up, it's a good dinner.
"big girl," you mean. This is clearly a toy for girls. Like the japanese "immersion pack" that's basically a vibrating pad that you sit on.
So can I use this to ride the white horse, virtually?