Cheaper than a Roomba!

Dear Parents, I understand it can be frustrating dealing with an insolent child when you are trying to accomplish your errands. Be warned that your public displays of discipline will often invoke umbrage and concern in other people who don't fully appreciate how spoiled your spawn is. ProTip - beat your children behind closed doors where no one will report you.

Sincerely,

Harvey_Birdman

Oh. My. God. I mean, it's better than leaving the kid in the hot car while you go update your phone contract, but geez lady, pick your kid up and carry him! Sometimes it's amazing the things people will do to their kids that they wouldn't even do to a dog. Or maybe they would...

I'm just going to ask this. Why does anyone think they need a leash for their kid?

Remember when kids could go out alone until the street lights came on?

I'm pretty sure that was a Cabbage Patch Doll, which would certainly explain the leash. (I'm on unrelated note, I'm also clinically insane...)

Is she dragging that kid by the neck?!?!

Even if the kid isn't being dragged by the neck this was incredibly stupid. Bare minimum she made the kid a tripping hazard and both the child and whomever stumbled on them could have gotten hurt.

Just as bad is the fact that no one did anything except the person with the cellphone. I assume that after taking the video that they're the ones who called the police. The person in the blue shirt wasn't facing them but we see someone almost step on the kid. Why didn't he at least say something?

@AreYouConfusedYet?HowAboutNow?: I think it is due to the increased chance of your child going missing right from under your nose.
Children nowadays see so much action in their every day lives that do not display the harmful consequences. running in the street through traffic without getting hit, riding bikes, skateboards, roller blades and such in unappropriated locations and in full view of the public. A child can get into trouble far faster now than when you or I were a child, (I am 44) and it seems the "neighborhood" does not watch children as they used to.
While I agree the dragging is wholly in the wrong, a leash for a child who is KNOWN to dart into the street, go off with strangers, run from their parent, or any other reasons is a choice best made by the people who are around the child more than the person who shot an 11 second video.

I use a leash as a safety measure/ training tool. I am teaching my 2 year old twin toddlers to hold my hands and walk with me in public. If a kid were to let go of me and start to bolt, the leash prevents the kids from running off or running into the street while we do this. That is the proper way to use them.

This lady is the reason that I get dirty looks while using mine. Grrr....Someone should drag her like that!

@AreYouConfusedYet?HowAboutNow?: When you have an 18 month old that bolts from you stealthily while you have your attention on the Verizon guy for two seconds, then you will know.

There is no excuse for DRAGGING a child with it though.

@Rectilinear Propagation: Exactly - that's why the Verizon employee should of said something to protect anyone else in the store let alone how irrehensible that is .

I don't care if the kid thinks it's fun . What if the kid caught something sharp on the floor .

@AreYouConfusedYet?HowAboutNow?:
I used to be allowed out until the street lights came on or my mom whistled for me. I also remember blissfully playing in dirt/sand/mud without my parents bathing me in Purell afterwards, as well as actually going outside during the summer rather than sitting inside playing video games. (I'm 29).

My ex used a leash one time with my son when they were traveling by themselves at the airport. He was around 2 or 3. Had her carry-ons plus him to deal with. Thought it would make it easier. The leash doesn't work too good when they decide to sit down. Picked him up and carried him the rest of the way.

Why should this mother have been arrested for abuse? The kid is not being hurt in anyway. He doesn't even seem upset. Most likely, he threw a temper tantrum and refused to get up, and the mom (rightly) ignored the tantrum and kept walking. Heck, the kid is getting a free ride; I probably would have loved this as a kid.

Probably it would have better for her to spank the kid and insist that he walk, but that still probably would have gotten her accused of 'abuse' and the police called.

@AreYouConfusedYet?HowAboutNow?: Kids need a leash when they like to behave like a crazed pinball, careening off everything and everyone.

Looks like fun, to me. Kids love that being dragged around on the carpet (at least my kids do).

I'd like to see more details on the story. For example, the mom's side.

Was the kid having a 'I'm not moving and you can't make me' lie down, to which she reminded him, in a remarkably simple way, that yes, she can make him move? It's not like a two mile jaunt.

I also wish there was sound. Is the kid screaming? I notice the child's legs aren't flailing as if he's trying to regain footing. Is he bothered at all? Since it's not a gravel walkway, but instead a store floor, it's not particularly harming to be dragged on. And most harnesses for children don't go around the neck.

In all honesty, and I know there are flames heading my way for this, it doesn't seem that bad. To me, it's far, far worse to see parents powerwalking through a mall with one child's arm in hand, the kid running to keep up, and sometimes not very successfully, so the child is, essentially, dragged by their arm as the parent shops.

I hate most kids and I'd be the first one to drag some screaming snot nosed brat across the floor by the hand while he's gone into limp mode because he didn't get some toy*. HOWEVER this is just disturbing. Maybe it's because there is no sound, or because the kid is completely flat on the ground (and the mom is walking pretty darn fast- ouch rugburn!). The child is also holding on to it, not to pull away, but as if it's choking him.

*don't worry, I'm childless

@cambiata: A voice of reason. That poor woman. I'd beat him.

@sybann: flame away!

@Rectilinear Propagation: She's dragging him from a harness and he's holding the leash.

@cambiata: +1

As a counter point, rather than get her cellphone "fix" maybe mom should have picked the child up kicking and screaming and dragged them out of the mall for some alone time.

I had to do that to my daughter.... ONCE. She never did it again.

@Fujikopez: If you can not handle your child then you should not be at the Verizon store. Put him in a stroller, or STAY HOME. The rest of us do not need to hear your brat screaming in the store while you take care of your business. YOU made the choice to have the kid, the rest of us, don't want to deal with him. Hire a babysitter, but dont make the rest of us have to deal with you and your brat.

"Melissa Catherine Smith-Means, 37, of Gaylesville, Ala., was arrested by Rome police around 12:30 p.m. She was charged with felony first-degree cruelty to children. Police say she was observed by customers and employees at a store on Broad Street, dragging a small child around by a backpack leash. The child had visible marks on the neck from the incident. She remains in jail without bail."

I suspect this is a woman who just went over the edge and made a horrible decision as opposed to a really horrible person. I have a child that was and still can be very frustrating and I can see in my mind a scenario where I'm 'tempted' to haul her around like this - but I never would... You pick the kid up and go back to the car. Then you hire a babysitter so you can run your errands - heck depending on the age of the kid, use his allowance to pay for it until he can behave in public if you need to teach him a lesson.

People would freak if you did this to an animal, I'm astonished people didn't do anything while she did this to a child.

@Ilovegnomes: Sometimes I want one of those leash things for my 4 year old.. She's figured out that if she yells "Let go! You're hurting me!!"
and her dad's family will release her.

Makes my life hard when she comes back.

Wow, some people seem to think that a parent can just snap their fingers and trustworthy babysitter appears. Totally not the case. And it certainly is not always practical to wait around at home until one magically appears so one can run important errands. First you have to find a babysitter that's available during the hours you need, then you have to trust that babysitter with your child, then you have to pay them a pretty good rate (I have to pay $10 an hour). Its not all that easy and simple.

So presumably the parent has to take the child with them at least sometimes. In that case, I do agree that a stroller (with good strong straps) is probably better than a leash for controlling young children. I had to deal with mine this weekend, and when the 23 month old kept running around while I was helping out my 4 year old, the young one was strapped back into her stroller. Yup, she cried and screamed some (gee, so sorry to those that just can't stand the sound, too bad but I don't have a magic babysitter), but at least she was safe and not being hurt.

I'd like to give the mom the benefit of the doubt, but I do agree that if the child was acting unruly or pouting/refused to get up, it would have been better to pick up the child and hold him rather than drag him. If you can't hold them up, then you should have brought the stroller.

@GrandizerGo: Things were not Brady Bunch super-safe in the 70s and 80s. Our parents just didn't freak out as much. Are you forgetting that this used to be Sesame Street's idea of showing us of a good idea for play:

Yeah, because running through random metal pipes and random construction sites was super-safe. This is why our educational show was noted as not being wholly safe for children to watch alone when they released it a few years back.

None of us wore bike helmets, knee pads or were covered in sanitizer anything. We were able to play with lawn darts and slip n' slide before it had bumpers and a retaining pool. The vast majority of kids I knew weren't medicated. We could get dry ice everywhere. I knew kids who had hitchhiked in junior high.

I don't think things are more dangerous by a long shot - I just think we're more paranoid. And somehow this okays treating your kid like an animal in the name of "just in case." Because it's a lot easier than actually parenting.

@gaywolverine: If you can't handle your own behavior, can you stay home too? I dislike brats as much as anyone else, but parents who actively take control of the situation and try to control the behavior of their children in public are so much better than parents who just don't care. I'd rather a kid be on a leash so he isn't running into my legs at full speed than a kid who doesn't have anyone stopping him.

My knees thank you, leash-wielding parents!

When I was a kid, if I threw a tantrum, I was reminded of the sheer hell and fury of my mother's anger by her voice, not her palm or fist or anything else. That woman could scare the fur off dogs. Eventually, I stopped myself before even thinking of throwing a tantrum because I knew my mom would yell at me. Looking back on it now, it was pretty emotionally scarring, but because it was mean, not constructive. Her anger was not authoritative, it was closer to immense frustration with life, and came out closer to hate than to constructive discipline. Things are better now, mostly because she's happier, and mostly because I'm an adult and I stood up to her.

I think maybe this mother was trying to take a proactive method of defying her child, but it looks extremely wrong, and isn't something she should do again. Even if no one was injured, you gotta know what it looks like to other people. You're not in your own home, you're in a public space. And everyone has a cell phone with a camera now. You won't escape the wrath of YouTube.

@AreYouConfusedYet?HowAboutNow?: Um, you've never had to take my kid through a crowded airport. Using the "leash" meant I kept contact through a crowd, even with a car seat and suitcase in my other hand. Well worth any odd looks to keep her safe.

[www.southparkstudios.com]

@pecan 3.14159265: the child leash has been around for ages. If you watch From Russia With Love I believe you will see briefly a girl with one one being followed by mom.

@gaywolverine: What the hell kind of attack is this? Why do you assume my daughter is a screaming brat? She's not. She's a quiet and polite kid. But she has been known to very quietly and quickly, despite repeated "conversations" (if you can call it that with a toddler), wander off around corners and such. Why do you hate toddlers so much, or assume they are all screeching animals? Face it, children are part of our society, so suck it up.

@Charlotte Rae's Web: Main difference: Pet leashes are attached by the neck, kid leashes are harnesses attached around the body (note the description "backpack leash"). The reason it would be shocking/abusive if this were done to a pet is that the pet would be choking during the incident. Whereas this kid is just getting the type of ride some kids beg and annoy their parents/aunts/uncles to give them. Way different.

@pecan 3.14159265: Or they could just walk over, grab the kid, pop the kid for acting like a little heathen, and carry it on back to the desk to finish their business...that's how I was brought up, worked JUST FINE!

@Stephmo: ah, now we also know why most HOA's don't allow laundry to be hung outside: it will smother the children

@snowmoon: That's how it was done to me...I can vouch for the effectiveness of that method.

@cc82: Ha ha, classic.

@pecan 3.14159265: I was spanked as a kid when I got too far out of line...but after one or two of those incidents, the hard stares/stern commands were more than sufficient most times...then again, there was also the positive reinforcement side of it, usually in the form of a cookie or something if I behaved the whole time...no guarantees on it, but what little kid is going to misbehave if it means ruining his chance at an awesome cookie? Basically my parents methods assured that temper tantrums and bad behavior never ended in me getting my way, whereas going along with their rules bettered my odds of it if the other conditions lined up (time to go to a store and desire of the parents to do so).

@Jevia:

Some people think getting a babysitter, even one that you haven't had the FBI run a background check on yet, is better than yanking the kid around with a leash. I personally think both activities indicate a parent who didn't quite get the responsibility she was taking on when she decided to have a kid.

This lady was at the Verizon store, not rushing into the hospital behind the ambulance carrying her near-death husband. In other words, this was not an emergency in which she had no way of planning for what to do with the kid.

I'd bet quite a bit that she decided to drag (metaphorically) the kid all over hell's half acre shopping here and there, expecting the kid to have the speed and stamina of an adult who's legs are three times as long. When the kid finally had enough, rather than realizing that little children are not just micro-adults and should therefore not be expected to run about all day while mom plays the mass consumerism game, instead she decided not to let the kid get in the way of her very important business.

There is a real trend in parenting these days in which people want to have a child, but do not want to suffer the inconveniences that go along with children. They therefore throw the kid in daycare within a month or so of birth, and do their best to only have to take the kid out of storage when the parent feels like playing mommy. I'd not at all be surprised if this video is the result of exactly such an attitude, in which case this lady is one of, frankly, the majority of parents out there who should never have children.

More people really should leash their children.

Oddly, I never had a leash put on me as a child, none of my friends had leashes put on them as children...suddenly it's necessary now? Are the kids more poorly behaved or are the parents just crazy amounts of lazy?

Maybe the trouble started when she tied the leash to her bumper. Then forgot she did. The little tyke probably held on for a few miles...

@Con Seannery: Yeah, because if she'd been filmed popping her kid, she would have totally NOT been turned in for abuse...

@Charlotte Rae's Web: Oh, I am tempted to do the same thing every single time a kid I'm watching decides to crumple to the floor to prevent me from making them leave. I think _wanting_ to drag kids is pretty common, but most people have that part of their brain that makes them stop before they do it. Pick the kid up.

@AreYouConfusedYet?HowAboutNow?because parents are lazy and won't watch their kid, plus they think their child will get stolen (I doubt the abduction per capita rate has gone up as much as TV coverage has). Also, no one is willing to let kids learn lessons the hard way. I got lost one time at the mall, big time. After that I made sure I paid attention to where my mom was.

I used to work for the city and everytime a kid wandered off to find ice cream or couldn't find the camp, the mom thought he had been stolen or killed (even 13 year olds...). It seemed as a teen I knew a lot more about kids than parents.

@Jevia: If you can't afford the cost of hiring a sitter or you can't afford or don't want the impact that having a kid tends to have on a your life, then don't have a kid!

This seems very simple to me.

Once you do have one, you are going to be dealing with it, for better or worse, for the next 18 years on average and nothing the kid does should be a surprise. Everything they do has been done, probably by you when you were that age. And sometimes the kid will keep you from doing stuff. The answer isn't "put the kid on a rope and drag it" or whatever.

@ThinkerTDM:

Yup...

@cambiata: Because if the kid's acting up enough for her to even come close to justifying dragging around the poor thing like that she should be doing her business online or over the phone.

@Con Seannery: Heck, on the way out, pick the kid up by the ankles for about 5-10 seconds, assuming you can control yourself enough not to drop them afterward. That gets their attention without causing any harm, and they almost certainly stop kicking and screaming.