Don't Let Dad Saw The Legs Off Corpses Or Your Funeral Home Might Get Shut Down
It's all well and good to let your father help out around the family funeral home, but if he doesn't have an embalming license—and is maybe too handy with an electric saw—keep him away from the important duties. A South Carolina funeral home just had its license revoked because four years ago the owner's father sawed the legs off a 6' 7" body to make it fit in the casket. The owner didn't tell the family at the time, and they only found out about it recently when an ex-employee told them. (See below for links to cool funk music—yes, it's related to this post!)
The body belonged to then 60-year-old J. Hines, an
albino black man who had several modest hits in the 1970s as a soul and funk guitarist with J. Hines and the Boys. He became a preacher later in life. His widow, Ann Hines, wasn't at Tuesday's hearing and didn't return a phone message from The Associated Press.
In honor of Hines, we tried to find some music of his for readers to listen to. We're all lucky, because someone else already did this and put together both a bio and several mp3s of Hines' music. Our favorite one is Can't Think of Nothing, but Funky Bumble Bee is also pretty great.
If you have to bury an oversized loved one, be sure to tell the funeral home that you intend to view the full body before burial. And not to try anything funny with a saw.
"Judge closes SC funeral home that cut corpse legs" [Associated Press]
(Photo: joeannenah)
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Comments:
You know, if Gramps would have eaten the leftovers, no one would have been the wiser.
...Sort of like a very large, somewhat formaldehydey-scented drumstick!
Isn't albino black like adult children or jumbo shrimp?
@MissPiss: Yup. Yucks aside, what are they thinking? It's a form of mental illness, it's so beyond the pale.
This is totally an episode of Six Feet Under!
didn't this happen on a episode of the outer limits or the new twilight zone?
They used to do this a long time ago when coffins were made in just one size. If the person was too tall then they would just cut the feet off. I don't really see the big deal. He's dead, it makes no difference to him.
Tragedy struck when a dead man's legs were cut off prior to his funeral. When contacted years later, the man made no comments on the issue.
I don't mean this at all in a snarky way, but wasn't this in the news a few months ago? I feel like I read about it on my local news, and the commenters there (cretins, really) made all sorts of comments about how "who needs their legs when they're dead, anyway?" I'll have to look into it.
Who cares, they are dead.
@MissPiss: Not lately. There were some really gross and reprehensible stories about this kind of thing about five years ago. Most involved stealing body parts out of dead bodies and selling them to bio-med companies that sold them for surgical procedures.
@zjgz: While I don't think he was buried in a Jewish cemetery, the Jewish (and I think, Jehovah's Witness) faith believes that the body should be buried whole. This is why orthodox Jews do not get body piercings or tattoos or donate organs. So in some cases, it would be a big deal.
@Hoss: Not even a little bit, as Albinism is a genetic condition that effects not only skin color, but hair color, eye color, sensitivity to light, and vision. You can be albino and have normal colored skin and hair, but have oddly colored eyes and poor vision, or even normal colored eyes and poor vision.
Not to mention, that black people with Albinism may have white skin, but all other physical features will remain consistent with their race.
@Hoss: actually they are hunted in some parts of africa by superstitious people who think that their body parts have magic powers
@ajlei: Yeah, it's old news, but the judge just ordered the funeral home closed this past Tuesday, after reviewing the situation (i.e., after the state Funeral Board exhumed the body and found the severed legs inside).
@Hoss: It's also how Red Rodney toured with Charlie Parker when stages were still segregated in the South ... Parker billed his redheaded trumpet player as an albino to get around the laws against having whites and blacks on stage at the same time.
If you pay well over $10,000 for a paticular service (a funeral) to honor the dead, and if "chopping the legs off of grandpa to make him fit the box" is not in the contract then we should ALL care. Same as violating any other contract. I like cars with functional brakes, medications that aren't 15% arsenic and grandpa's remains properly respected.
@Hoss: No. I can only assume that with your attempt at humor was inspired by a dumb animal similar to the one in your profile pic.
Well did they get 1/2 off the fees?
Sorry someone had to say it. But this is pretty bad. Sure the guy is dead, but you know, respect for the body, family wishes, things like that should be observered. If they family said Sure go for it for the cheaper casket then buy all mean have fun and get a sword or an ax. But that normally isan't a request, unless the dead guy was a magician, then that would be a neat trick.
The attorney found only one other time a funeral home had its license revoked- ya and how many others were caught illegally sawing peoples legs off without notice to the family?
ZERO.
@silver-bolt: MissPiss is talking aboutM burr oaks which has been in the ::EVERY:: news [consumerist.com] I think they were just trying to be green. that makes everything okay right? because I said it was green?
How did the family not notice that Grampa's casket was only 6 foot long?
@Trai_Dep: "Yes, we sympathize with the recent loss of your loved one. However, we must discuss one detail that may be a bit unsettling: A standard casket can accommodate a person up to 6' in stature. While generally we can bend the knees if the body is a bit taller, say 6'4", but your dearly departed is a bit taller than that.
We can special order a custom-size casket for his remains, but you should also be aware that it may not fit inside a standard cemetery plot, and they may charge you extra, possibly for a second adjacent plot.
You could opt to have his remains cremated instead, or... we can resolve this matter with the aid of a bandsaw..."
@mianne: "we can resolve this matter with the aid of a bandsaw..."
Even though I knew what you were implying, I think as a grieving family I would think that you would cut two holes in the end of the casket for his feet to stick out of. The advantage of this is you don't need Pallbearers, just stick some roller skates on the deceased and push him.
Clearly Dad wasn't a fan of H.P. Lovecraft. If he'd ever read
In The Vault, he would have left that saw in the toolbox.
@diasdiem: While I agree with mostly harmless...
I don't think that you notice the size (lengthwise) of the dead's coffin. Unless it's a small person or baby or a very, very obese person you probably don't even notice.
@Nicole:
I knew a guy in college who was an albino. He had white hair and he used to punk it out and streak it different colors (this was in the 80s). It was so cool.
When mom complained that the truck bed didn't have seatbelts, my dad gave me a rope. How many of us can honestly say that our old dads wouldn't do something like this? Dads are well known for fixing stuff cheap and easy. They're the masters of keep-it-simple-stupid.
@bohemian: You are thinking of Biomedical Tissue Services of Fort Lee, New Jersey, a tissue-recovery firm.
And don't forget the infamous Marsh Vault and Grave / Tri State Crematory from North Georgia in 2002...
[en.wikipedia.org]
I had actually met the mother of Ray Brent Marsh in 1999 - 2000. She struck me as a stuck-up community activist (probably covering for the mess at home).
@Hoss: Nope, completely possible and I have seen American folks of African heritage with this condition.
@ajlei: @Chris Walters:
As Chris said- it is proved and the business shut down so the main stream media can report it now. The topic is on the fringes of the average reporter's gnat sized brain because of the Burr Oak problem...
@henrygates: When my granddad couldn't get the bag of his sister's ashes open to scatter on the family farm, he wanted to tie it to the back of his Buick and drive around until it broke open. The family had to intervene to stop this plan.
I agree, that's why I support sex with corpses...because if she wouldn't give it up while she was alive, she sure can't stop you now!
@Hoss: Yes, it is like your other examples, in that it is a noun preceded by an adjective.
I know you're being disingenuous to make a joke, but to run down your examples, 'black' is used in this case to mean someone of African American origin rather than a color, 'children' is used to describe offspring who are not necessarily minors, and 'shrimp' is used to describe a crustacean, not as a slang term meaning a small person.
Hope this helps!
What is it with people messing with dead people lately?!