Ten Stupid Infomercials Will Shake Your Faith In Capitalism
The best thing about YouTube is that it lets us see wacky commercials and insipid infomercials without the inconvenience of watching TV. Where would the Comfort Wipe be without it?
TruTV rounded up ten stupid infomercials for your viewing amusement. Some are familiar, like the Slap Chop remix. Some aren't, like the Kush Support, a $55 nighttime cleavage spacer. My current favorite, embedded above, is the Uroclub—a portable urinal disguised as a golf club. Let's check out their ad copy:
How many times has this happened? You're playing 18 holes with your best buddies, drinking sport-"ades", water, beer, etc. You're coming up to the 3rd hole with no rest room in sight. There are no trees or bushes around and you just have to go, what are you going to do?
The UroClub™ is the discrete, sanitary way for your urgent relief. Created by a Board Certified Urologist, it looks like an ordinary golf club, but contains a reservoir built into the grip to relieve yourself. The UroClub™ is leak proof, easy to clean and no more embarrassing moments.
All for only $24.95. Order now!
Top 10 Dumb Infomercials [Dumb as a Blog]
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Comments:
Damn, just missed Father's Day.
They could call it the EuroClub and give it a little more panache.
Have you seen the new commercial for Arm & Hammer baking soda with Billy Mays in it? I about peed myself I laughed so hard.
(And how weird is it when the baking soda commercial is hilarious funny because it's so META? Isn't baking soda supposed to be a boring consumer good?)
Actually, stuff like this should re-affirm your faith in capitalism. It says that everybody who's got a crazy dream for a crazy product can actually get it out there to be universally ridiculed or bought by another crazy dreamer.
Holy frick, I want a Hawaii Chair.
What's worse than getting beaten with a golf club? Getting beaten with a golf club full of urine. Mafiosos will love this.
Question: What happens when you have to do number two?! Dammit Uroclub! You've sold me half a product! DAMN YOU UROCLUB!!!!
I suddenly want a Tiddy Bear...or maybe seeing all of those close-up boob shots makes me want to molest some "Tiddies". It's hard to tell.
I always thought some of these were fake. The UroClub, for example....what man would seriously buy one? The whole golf course (hell, the whole EARTH) is our toilet!
My favourite is the egg genie due to the fact that the woman who can't figure out how to hard boil an egg seems to have no problem whipping up perfect hollandaise sauce or using a pastry pipette with flawless chef level precision.
@LordofBacon: Who says you can't use this club to do #2? With a little practice, you should be fine.
And, to the guys walking down the next fairway, it will simply look like your trying to shove a golf club up your ass. Nobody will be the wiser.
@Dan Cull:
I love how the people they show using the Hawaii Chair are struggling to maintain their balance.
Well he is checking out one club...
/Sorry I just needed to say that.
Where's Kevin Tredeau?
@Nighthawke: Doesn't shake my confidence in Capitalism at all. Actually, I find it heartening. Perhaps I can come up with some ridiculous product and become rich.
Reminds me of a P.T.Barnum quote.
Wait, the Hawaii chair is great on his... abs? Funny, that's not the body part I expected him to say.
@Eyebrows McGee (now with more baby!): I haven't seen it since I FF past the 20 or so minutes of commercials that are in an hour-long show. I'll have to hit the stop button if I see it come on.
And if you wish to see more of Billy Mays, check out discover channel's Pitchmen. He and Anthony Sullivan are seen coming up with the next greatest thing. Of course, not everything they choose actually makes it. But I would still suggest recording it so you can skip past all the commercials that discovery jams into every episode.
"Where would the Comfort Wipe be without it?"
uhhmmm... do you REALLY want me answer that?
@Dan Cull: If you need any more convincing, here's Olivia Munn and that other guy from G4 TV doing a show in Hawaii Chairs, proving you can get a day's work in while sitting in one of these:
Has anyone caught episodes of the Pitchmen on Discovery? ([dsc.discovery.com]) I've only seen a few episodes, but I'm sort of becoming a bit more in awe of folks that get things to infomercial stage - plus, it stars Billy Mayes!
The future WTF? Infomercials of tomorrow are on this show!
Someone still needs to explain to me why you can make any outrageous claim you want about a "dietary suplement" as long as you display somewhere in small print "This statement has not been evaluated by the FDA."
Dude... I totally want a Hawaii Chair. It looks so fun!
@mizike: I always get indignant and angry when I see guidelines for cooking eggs that do not factor in the starting temperature of the egg. I'll stand there yelling and hyperventilating at an egg timer in Bed Bath and Beyond until my GF drags me away, ranting and pointing until its out of view. The Egg Genie would no doubt incense me in the same manner.
Wasn't the slap chop rap just a parody put onto youtube? From this you would think that the piece was actually used as a commercial.
@SacraBos: Y'know, I think us younger guys laugh about these inventions. But after traveling with my 60 year old dad in the car I have figured out these portable releiving devices have their place, especially for men with enlarged prostates.
My favorite part of any infomercial is the illustration of the "problem" the product is meant to solve. People are shown unable to bring food successfully to their mouths, unable to cook pasta or boil an egg, unable to dig a hole for a tomato plant, unable to sleep without flopping around like a fish on a riverbank, or unable to chop vegetables. It's hilarious TV.
@ludwigk: I dunno, we bought that Egg Genie guy (at BB&B in fact!) and it is at least as effective in hard boiling our (recently refrigerated) eggs as we were, the difference is the Egg Genie can be turned on and then ignored until the little buzzer goes off. Dead simple!
Does not faze me one bit. If it sells, then the idiot that bought it deserves it.