Sorry Miss Butt, Your Name Is Illegal
Reader Janet Butt was trying to sign up for an airline miles program when she ran into a prudish form processor that deemed her last name "illegal."
Janet writes:
I tried to sign up for the Airmiles Reward Miles program at www.airmiles.ca yesterday, June 2, 2009, but could not complete the registration process due to an error. The error read, "There are illegal words in your input text", as per the attached picture. At first, I thought that perhaps the system had a problem with the punctuation in the name of my city, St. John's, Newfoundland (as I have had issues with this on other sites before), but after removing the period and the apostrophe, I was still unable to register. Then it hit me. My surname is Butt.I Googled "funny surnames", just to see whether there were other "illegal" names out there. Oddly enough, I was able to continue without error by using the last names Balls, Death, and Cockshott (all real surnames)
No "illegal words" error when I tried to sign up as "Janet Nipples", either.
I contacted them via their feedback link and they contacted me today, saying that I could email my information to them for processing. I asked if they might fix this problem and got a reply with their generic message saying they would "forward my concerns to the appropriate department".
We don't know what to do here. We understand that there is a need for safeguards, lest the online world be overrun by Amanda Hugenkisses and Mike Hunts. Nonetheless, these restrictions eventually preclude people with unfortunate real names from using them, adding even more hassle to their lives.
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Comments:
They call me Adolph Oliver Bush.
*Cue the "big butts" jokes*
I can only imagine years of schoolteachers and prospective employees looking down, raising an eyebrow, and then looking up with vague amusement at Janet Butt. She's had to live with that her whole life, and now this.
Get Marty McFly. You need to go convince some distant relations that they're making a mistake.
I once knew a girl who's last name was Butts. It really was unfortunate. My last name was always the subject of ridicule in elementary and middle school because it sounds like "ass" and is constantly misspelled as Hass and not Haas.
Oh the perils of having a last name that is funny.
Let's not pick on the consumer here, making her the butt of our jokes...
She should just type in "(|)"
Seymore has exactly the same problem. Poor guy.
Try another language. Janet Nalga.
I knew a girl who's last name was Glasscock. She changed it when she married (at 18). I wonder if they would accept that last name?
(And no, you don't pronounce it like it looks.)
@pecan 3.14159265: I am fond of them...and I always tell the truth. You other siblings must also agree.
The last name "Biggerstaff" has always freaked me out. If you've never heard of or known anyone with that last name, you'll see what I mean when you meet someone with it.
I would agree with you, except that I know someone with the last name Butt. By no means is he a small fry in his company. In fact, he controls the entire North American and Canadian section of his multibillion dollar corporation.
Looks to be a shady operation anyway, if they can't spell "Enrollment" right.
If I remember correctly, Janet has a sister named Bertha. (sorry Janet, but someone had to say it)
I saw a soccer player with the last name of "Fucker", pronounced "Fuss-ker".
I had a similar-but-not-nearly-as-hilarious problem when signing up for credit cards. My address has a "1/2" in it, and I discovered that most credit card forms won't accept that.
My personal favorite is Craven Moorehead...
@undefined: For going through such duress, they should give her a two-for-one, or an "Ugh, Double Up, Ugh Ugh" deal, if you will.
H-E-B, a huge supermarket chain in Texas, is named after Howard E Butt and is still controlled by the Butt family. I remember my friends and I snickering about that in elementary school, but I think being 7 is a valid excuse.
Wait! Was she using her debit card? If so, then that's just the most terrible thing ever.
That's mighty cheeky of the airline to program things that way.
My friend Holden McGroyn has never had these problems
@Gramin: And his subordinates giggle uncontrollably whenever they read an email from him, I promise you.
In my little Ohio town, back in 1974, we had a HUGE F'ING TORNADO. It killed 33 people. Included in these 33 were the two sons of an Indian professor at a nearby college, whose last name was 'DIKSHIT'. My town decided to make a public memorial stone for those killed in the disaster... but luckily the parents decided to change their children's name post-mortem to DIXIT. Life is weird sometimes.
@KernelM:
I lived in Houston for a couple years and still snickered about it at 24. My BF liked to say "Let's go to Heb" as if reading it as a word and not initials. I also liked how they adopted "Here Everything's Better" as their slogan... seemed like they were trying to make people forget that the B stood for Butt.
I went to a friend's bar mitzvah many years ago when I was a kid (I'm not Jewish, so it was the only one I've been to), and at the synagogue where it was held, I remember seeing a list of benefactors to the synagogue. Among them was the name, "Louis Gaylord." I wonder how he's getting along with his name?
At a government proceeding, the lawyer's name was Mr. Schmuck (and he pronounced it like "luck"). His client's name was (this is real folks) Donald Duck. The hearing examiner had to call a recess to stop laughing.
My very favorite High School teacher was Mrs. Dick. I bet poor Mrs. Dick would have the same problem, as would the whole Dick family.
Okay this policy confuses me for reasons other than the obvious. You can only earn miles on tickets you use under your own name, yes? And you can't get through the security gate (at least not without a hell of an annoying and futile hassle) without them verifying your ticket name against some form of official identification, so why would they assume people would spend the ridiculous cash on an unusable ticket with a stupid joke name on it? It seems logical, and frankly quite a lot easier just to allow everything.
Aww, Mike Hunt. You will haunt me forever. What with my memories of tending bar near the Culinary in upstate NY... my sweet, naive self being taken in by the seemingly innocuous request...
... yelling out at the TOP of my lungs "IS MIKE HUNT HERE"? The second it hits your lips, you know... but are unable to stop.
Damn you, Mike Hunt. You have always been more trouble than I could imagine.
@missdona: I had a Jr. High teacher named Mr. Dick, too. He was 6'5", had a bowl cut, a porn 'stache and wore short-shorts with knee socks. In 1992. He was also mean, and once suspended a kid for greeting him with "How's it hangin', Mr. Dick." True story.
She and I should be friends. My maiden name is White, and more than once I received airline tickets (back in the olden days before e-tickets) with my last name spelled "Whipe".
At least people understand the difference between your first and last name, unlike mine, which could theoretically be switched, and often is. In fact, I get called lastname firstname more often than I get called firstname lastname, even by people looking at my ID, EVEN BY POLICE OFFICERS WHO YOU'D THINK WOULD KNOW HOW TO READ AN ID FROM THEIR OWN STATE.
I've known more than one Butt, actually. It doesn't seem so weird, but I guess auto-puter-systems want to head off those hordes of 13 year olds trying to sign up for airmiles..?
In another job a few years ago, I also came across the names "Titsworth" and "Bumpass"
Those are truly phenomenal.
It took nearly a year for Facebook to accept that my last name was actually "High"
Hee hee. Illegal Butts.