I had the chance to buy some teeth with gold fillings at an estate sale a while back. Seemed too creepy to deal with. What if they were teeth recovered from exterminated Jews or something? Ewww....

@geoffhazel:

Well, I can see the problem there. No one wants Jew teeth when you can get good ol' christian teeth. Personally, I prefer atheist teeth myself. I like to put them in a big jar and late at night I swear I can hear the sounds of little screams and smell brimstone from them.

@henwy: By all means avoid buying gold fillings that belonged to a Buddhist. Otherwise you might one day run across a child asking to have them back!

@geoffhazel: You could make cufflinks out of them like the lawyer in The Great Gatsby.

There was one of these set up in Raleigh last weekend at a holiday inn near the mall.

It anything it's probably just a case of private citizens using the Cash4Gold name, renting the hotel space, buying up all this gold and then actually selling it to Cash4Gold (or whoever gives them the most money).

If the "4" in the name isn't enough of a warning sign, then there just isn't any hope for some people.

I would also like the media to know that anyone using my companies name, Cash4BowlingBalls.com, is doing so illegally. Only I, Steve Davidson, will send you a pre-paid mailing sack, and have master globulologists examine your bowling ball and send you cash! We offer the highest prices for your used and mis-matched bowling balls.

@henwy:

Yeah, I do the same thing myself with Christian teeth. Except late at night, I don't hear anything......

[www.theonion.com]

Cash4Gold is worried about people fraudulently using their good name? There's a difference between a name that's advertised constantly and commonly associated with ripoffs and a name that's good.

Hah. A fraudulent company is saying look out for frauds?

HAHAHAHA.

I haven't laughed like that in a while.

It's like a Nigerian prince warning you about the UK lottery scam

@Shoelace: Ze sarcasm! Zey do nahhthing!

Cash4Gold should be happy about this misappropriation of their name. Misappropriating a good name is bad, so misappropriating a bad name can only be good, right?

I think you should have said "sully" the good name of Cash4gold instead of "soil".

On a side note, I am going to create a business called Cash3gold. It's like 6 minute abs, but better!

@Saboth: How about Cash2Gold?

@Saboth:

I would go for Gold4Cash, or Gold2Cash

I am opening a company called Cash2Gold, whereby using ancient, copyrighted magic, I can actually turn your paper money into real gold! Don't be fooled by other alchemist claiming they have the secret such as Cashn2gold or Morticizan da Magnificent, only send your paper money to me and I will send you back however much gold it creates.

Is this article here just so we can have a good old laugh? Because this is very hilarious, hahahahhahahahhaha

Well, I suppose it's possible that the hotel-based events are an even bigger ripoff than Cash4Gold.

Seriously, they have to do this. If you don't protect your trademark, you can lose it.

Guess now I'll have to rename my gold-buying events Monster Gold.

@Saboth: Cash5Gold. It's 1 better.

Perhaps you should also update your previous, apparently inaccurate story in case someone finds it and believes those parties are run by a legitimately shady company and not an impostor.

@Saboth:

> It's like 6 minute abs, but better!

Not six, seven!

Seven chipmunks
Twirlin' on a branch
Eatin' lots of sunflowers
On my uncle's ranch.

You know, that old children's tale. From. The sea?

@madanthony: Well don't come crying to us when Monster (R)(TM)(C)(PAT PENDING) sues you for using that.

Where I live (Murfreesboro TN) there was a jeweler that went out of business. Someone bought the store and kept pretty much all of the name. Now they've got people at every street corner on the main road (Memorial/Old Fort) that have giant yellow arrow signs that read "CASH FOR GOLD" with a smaller sign underneath that has the business name.

They aren't even the somewhat entertaining sign flipper/spinner guys. They just sort of "rock" the sign back and forth.

I get really sick of seeing these people during my commute to work.

@paulrules: Was that shift+laugh? Or the more hearty CAPSLOCK+laugh?

@TCama: Hmm. I'm not sure. Perhaps we should ask the boy in this article how his birthday cake turned out. =P

[www.msnbc.msn.com]

@HillSA23: Nice!

@Josh_G: I'm going to start my company called CashFerGold.

I'm deterred from patronizing any business that uses a number as a synonym for a word. I also won't support anything that replaces the letter s with z.

@JerseyCam.orgFounder_GitEmSteveDave: What about redrilled balls? I encountered a pink ball at Goodwill that had the original holes filled with clear and was redrilled for the most petite (and I imagine) woman's hands. I could barely get my fingers half way down the closely spaced holes.

That got me thinking on whether I could by a used ball and get it filled and drilled for myself.

@craptastico: The modalities of all persons presuming to represent UK lottery are falsehoods. Available moneys are always storied in secure storage lockers by the former Nigerian prime minister of culture awaiting your paying the rental fees to a lawyer able to get the locker released. All transfers via safe and secure Western Union.

@geoffhazel: The old timer probably had to get dentures and kept the old teeth.

@tahamaki: Those sign guys were up here in (North Nashville,TN) too with their CashForGold waggling signs.

Perhaps only the furniture and phone businesses pay enough for the guys to flip and spin the signs. Like a sliding scale: if you pay us minimum wage per hour we just stand there holding your sign, every dollar above minimum gets an added activity every 5 minutes.

According to the US Patent Office ([tess2.uspto.gov]) - Cash4Gold applied for trademark in Nov 2007, abandoned the application in April 2008, and applied again for a Cash4Gold trademark in January 2009 -it's still pending.

I'm very concerned that this will derail their goal of processing $100 million in gold by the Fourth of July...I'm pulling 4 you Cash4Gold!

@enthreeoh: Came in here to link that. . . great timing!

Honest question: is Cash4Gold really a scam, or is it just fun to make fun of?

I ask because obviously it makes intuitive sense that it *could* be a scam. I mean, really, "mail us your gold, we'll tell you what it's worth" can't possibly go wrong, can it?

That said, if they *were* scamming people routinely, given their high profile, wouldn't they be out of business by now?

What's the real story, Consumerists?

@JerseyCam.orgFounder_GitEmSteveDave: Well, I always wondered what I could do with my used balls. Thanks for the information.

Is this something like naming your business "Madoff Investments?"

Google Cash4Gold and Consumerist has done a couple of articles on them...not very positive. I used Goldkit.com and got $79 for a old gold filled molar I was about to toss in the garbage because I was sick of looking at it in the drawer. Very pleased with them.

@NegativeNelli_GitEmSteveDave: If I polish my balls, how does that affect the offer price?

@m4ximusprim3: @econobiker: As I am not a certified master Globulologist, I am afraid I can not answer your questions. If you do not like our appraised value, you have 5 days from when your 7th class mailing sack was mailed from us to ask for your items back for a complete refund. Satisfaction is guaranteed. You should direct any questions to our spokesperson, Ed McMahn.

@madanthony: Where do you think Monster gets the gold for their connectors?

@Daveinva: This will give you some insight as to what you are dealing with:
[consumerist.com]

@slickdealer:

Probably because the former owner is too busy enjoying Heaven....

@Jonathan Marek Bailey:
Ahhh facebookers. They always find a way to make me chuckle.

@Coop:

Thanks! We tend to be funnier than the average anonymous troll that only has self-confidence when hiding behind an avatar and a handle. Those people just tend to be insulting. :)