Sorry, You Can't Fly Because Your Name Is Hyphenated
Alright everyone, gather round and let me share with you the pain of living with a hyphenated name. Occasionally it's fun and amusing, a third nipple stapled to your ID. Occasionally, it's a miserable nightmare, as Yarn Harlot Stephanie Pearl-McPhee learned when she wasn't allowed to board a flight after an anonymous airline's computer severed her hyphenated name. Neither passports, a conversation with the booking agent, nor a printed receipt showing the proper hyphenated name could convince the airline gate agent that Pearl-McPhee was anything more than a foolishly named terror.
I don't want to change my name, I just want to shuffle Pearl from my middle name there — over there to the next box, next to McPhee. Simple, yes?
No. That's a name change. They can't change it. I cant change it. Only the agent who booked it can change it. I call Andrews McMeel (who are the agent who booked it and also eight flavours of awesome through the whole thing) and tell them what's happening. They check the original booking, and find that while they provided my name correctly, and yay, verily, it is even correct on their receipt, something has shifted in the AWISNNBIATATGTTGH [Airline-Whom-I-Shall-Not-Name-Because-I-Am-Too-Angry-To-Give-Them-The-Google-Hits] computer. We agree that this is crazy pie, but that it sounds simple to fix. They call AWISNNBIATATGTTGH and point out that all of my names appear on the ticket. (This, it turns out is sheer folly, since I had already tried the superweapon of logic on AWISNNBIATATGTTGH, and they were undefeated.) AWISNNBIATATGTTGH replies that it does not matter, since my last name on the ticket is McPhee, and McPhee is not my last name. (On this, we all agree.)
For my part, while they are on the phone with the lady from AWISNNBIATATGTTGH, I pull out various pieces of ID with my name on it, and brandish the sword of calmness and information. It is fruitless.
Kathy from Andrews McMeel eventually figures this out too, after a very, very noble attempt to be sensible in the face of it all, and she finally snaps, and tells the AWISNNBIATATGTTGH lady (who is now on the phone with AWISNNBIATATGTTGH head office and Kathy, one phone to each ear) to forget it. The name is wrong. It does not matter why or how it is wrong, the degree of wrongness doesn't matter. We get that we can't change it. (The reasons for this are unclear, but the name now cannot be changed. Possibly because there are about 14 seconds until the flight closes. Who knows.) Kathy tells them to forget the ticket. That ticket is dead to us. We don't know any McPhee lady and we don't want to. We wipe the slate clean and say that we would like to buy a ticket to Florida please... a whole new ticket. A ticket that has nothing to do with the other ticket, and the lady from AWISNNBIATATGTTGH smiles a little, because she has won on the name thing, and then she says:
"Sorry. There are no seats available on that flight."
Pearl-McPhee finally gave up and walked away from the mystery airline so she could instead book a ticket with Air Canada.
In which I try not to complain [Yarn Harlot]
(Photo: dykstranet)
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Comments:
That mystery airline really should be exposed (my legal name has a hyphen in it). Or maybe not, since I only fly with our much better canadian airlines.
@notsogreatsatan: I clicked on the link and the site is yarn harlot and AWISNN... is an abreviation for the airline
Thank you! I was coming over here to say the same thing. I'm completely confused by the way this story was told.
@notsogreatsatan: Yarn Harlot is the name of her blog. She's a knitting instructor and pattern designer. Is she really supposed to explain that in every single blog entry on the off chance that Consumerist might pick it up?
As for AWISNNBIATATGTTGH, that's explained, too, but Consumerist didn't quote it.
because of my long last name my first name is often printed as Daniel instead of Danielle. I find it suprising that boarding passes can't accomodate longer names
@notsogreatsatan: Yarn Harlot Stephanie Pearl-McPhee is the authors name. I bet that stinks when she has to fill out a form with boxes for letters or heavens forbid, a scantron form.
It's probably Air Wisconsin. I see them everyday down here in Florida flying from up north.
@dave23: Also, if you read the full article, you would know that AWISNNBIATATGTTGH is short for: Airline-Whom-I-Shall-Not-Name-Because-I-Am-Too-Angry-To-Give-Them-The-Google-Hits
Whose name was billed for the original ticket?
This is what happens here in our new times of arbitrary and unnecessary restrictions and hoop-jumping for nebulous "security" reasons. What we get are power-tripping employees mixed in among the reasonable employees, land mines that we poor, hapless customers of these services might trip at any time through no fault of our own.
You never know if you're going to get someone who has decided they're going to be a jerk just for the thrill it gives them or if you're going to get an actual human, and all of the stupid rules and regulations that can be all too easily misinterpreted or misapplied are what make it possible for us to get completely boned in this quagmire that airline travel has become. It's just utterly ridiculous.
charge back......
If the Yarn Harlot exposes the airline's name, ravelry.com will explode with knitter drama.
You should've seen it when American confiscated a woman's metal knitting needles.
I am always afraid that my hyphenated name will cause this kind of problem some day. So far, it hasn't, but I did encounter a jerky fingerprinter. (I was being fingerprinted because I do volunteer work with children). He was really belligerent about asking me about my name. It's like he had never encountered such a think before, and he didn't get it when I said I used two last names. "So you use aliases?" he asked. "No," I said. "I use both my maiden name and my husband's name. It's really very common."
Were I the TSA or the gate agent, anyone with "Harlot" in their name would get a free pass. And upgrade, too!
@girlleastlikelyto: That alias question he asked you seemed like he was inferring something (like maybe you were a criminal.). I would be so livid. :/
It really saddens me that that IS really common, yet people don't get it.
*sigh* Just 'cause you hate your job doesn't mean you can be rude to me.
@girlleastlikelyto: One of my professors does this, but she doesn't hyphenate it. I wonder if she puts her maiden name as her middle and husband's name as her last. We address her by her husband's name, but she signs everything First, Maiden, Husband's. Hmm..
@dave23: Now do you recognize the futility of trying to name AWISNNBIATATGTTGH?
If you really want to see those in the know blanche, say the real name out loud. (Muggles, of course, are except: poor, unknowing fools)
@shadowboxer524: when I got married I changed my middle name to my maiden name and took my husbands last name. I usually write both too.
@Jessica Haas: But in this instance, since she could not reach a reasonable agreement (that should've been easy to reach) with the people involved - it probably is the best solution.
@Trai_Dep: did she ever have a "maiden" name?
On that note, why do CSRs always want to know the name of my mom before she had proper and thorough exposure to a penis? Can we please be rid of this question? That whole system will soon be pretty irrelevant in any case...I figure if a man wants to share a name he is more than welcome to take mine. Will my children be identified by their father's "maiden name?"
@Mills: I can kinda see that - in the hands of an angry person, knitting needles can be a little scary.
@Vanilla5: But she got to where she was going anyway, and by not letting her on the plane with her ticket, they probably refunded her anyway. (it was not mentioned in the article.)
@richcreamerybutter: The system works for most Americans most of the time, but you can rid yourself of it by making up the answer. It's not like they're comparing the name you give against the National Mother's Maiden Name database (i.e., the Internet); they're comparing against the answer you gave them. As an example, my mother's maiden name will henceforth be Sasquatch or maybe Turd-Fergusen.
Also, a most American women are still changing their names and most children are still born in wedlock, so unfortunately it won't soon be totally irrelevant (but it will always be insecure).
@girlleastlikelyto: No, it really isn't that common, and I live near hippy Berkeley, which probably has one of the highest concentrations of hyphenated last names of this sort.
From the perspective of a computer, having a "-" in your name is similar to a "%", or a "!", or a "*", in terms of running into some coder oversight and having fun ridiculous problems like this.
To me this is interesting because there are a number of arab naming conventions where a person will have 10+ last names describing their lineage, particularly if they are from a significant family, but they only use one major last name for non-formal situations. That is to say, the have a cultural need to have many last names, but they have 'figured it out' in terms of having a practical naming convention that works for the real world, something that hyphenating-last-name-making parents really haven't done.
my hyphenated name is the reason why i haven't received a tax return for the first five years i've worked. there was a disconnect between irs and social security with my name because one of their computers couldn't fit the full name. so i've gone years without filing taxes. before you say something smart, you don't owe penalties if they owe you. my best bet at this point is to tell them to audit me. it would work to my favor and fatten my pocket a little.
@girlleastlikelyto: An easy solution is just to take your husband's name. I don't understand why women have to be in control so much, lol.
@ludwigk: The computer's perspective is what the humans involved give it, though. It's the name equivalent of Y2K--people didn't think enough about reality when they made the design. And it's not like it's a new thing, or limited to America.
Although it sounds like this might have been human error anyway, with somebody putting the pre-hyphen name into the middle-name field.
@notsogreatsatan: so, there's this interesting mechanism on the web called the "hyperlink", which lets your web browser be sent to whatever other page is linked to.
@gauden44: It is basically a choice they have. Take your husband's name or keep your father's name. Hyphenator's annoy me. Pick one or the other - not both.
As for the article, the lady has a valid complaint but she should definately internet shame the airline by posting the name.
Hyphenated names are not scalable across generations. If everyone did this, our names would increase in length exponentially.
@floraposte: I've NEVER understood why this seems to be such a widespread problem with computers. It's really really easy to program computer software to avoid this sort of problem using some simple regexes and such. Same as how I don't get it when a website rejects your phone number for being in (xxx) xxx-xxxx format instead of xxx-xxx-xxxx. WHY? Just have the software correct it...it's not like it's hard.
@notsogreatsatan: Seriously. This story is infuriating for two reasons: 1) it's a crappy thing for the gate agent to do, since it sounds like she was following the letter of the policy in order to avoid compensating someone for the overbooked flight and 2) the author's self-restraint to avoid criticizing the airline makes reading the story next to useless.
Why not just name the airline? One does not typically change the names to protect the guilty.
@Jessica Haas: Sure it is. If I remember Dress to Kill correctly, that is... Got a bad back, chargeback. You've got diphtheria? Chargeback. Your head's come off! CHARGEBACK. :)
@johnva: I'm sorry, but you're wrong. There's more than one way to hyphenate (consider the Spanish method, for example).
Regardless, the prudence of hyphenating has nothing to do with the story.
I thought that keeping your maiden name for work/business reasons (wherein you already have established relationships and name recognition) and using your married name socially was extremely common, and that even airlines would not be so stupid as to deny this practice, but I'm sure they're just being greedy. I once had to pay 100 extra dollars because the agent got my name wrong when I spelled it to him on the phone when booking my travel. Can she do a charge-back?
@johnva: Yeah. I used to think the kids got the hyphenated name, and then I realized they usually just got their father's, so...from then on, there didn't seem to be much point.
@Jessica Haas: Sure, she got to where she was going - by switching airlines and purchasing another ticket. It was not mentioned whether they refunded her but since they were being so ridiculous in the first place, I wouldn't have held my breath on that one. But if they hadn't, a chargeback would definitely be in order as well as a letter to the unmentioned airlines' upper-level customer service team.
@notsogreatsatan: Yeah, it would have been nice. That plus the slightly mysterious "Yarn Harlot" epithet plus the very self-conscious writing style (it wasn't clear that this was excerpted from a blog, and it didn't appear to be a business letter to the company, so I was wondering if people wrote in to the Consumerist like this) made for a disorienting reading experience.
And the airline should definitely be named. Simply accruing google hits is not a plus for the company if those hits lead to critical accounts.
@ianarnott: You may not owe penalties, but it's still illegal. Your best bet is to file, because 1) they can't audit if they have nothing to audit and 2) an audit isn't something you want to ask for.
And I don't need to say anything smart, because I know that if you're missing the last 5 years of refunds, you're only able to collect on three of those. The government appreciates your donation.
What is a Yarn Harlot? What's a AWISNNBIATATGTTGH? The article defines neither, which implies I'm supposed to already know.. Is this a case of the author assuming we exist inside his/her head and automatically understand what they are talking about or am I just hopelessly out of the loop?